Either I’M too drunk to bE drunk or too fi==ukkkin’g Stupid to bE Stupid, oR WP is STUPID! i AM GONNA GO W/OPTION “c” UP-PUP_Fuckin’ Dated! Profane Profanity! (With Special Guest Star Cordelia) I am So Far Away From “Give-a-Shit-Land” that even If I had Unlimited Access to the Hubble: It would Make as ’bout as Much and Concern to Me as a Cup of Warm Copenhagen Spit! I’d Just FLUSH IT Along with all the Other sUPER-dUPPER superfulious callifragile —-you know rhe resa=a=song—if you have a fucking brain! I am removin’ from MY Knife (and MY LIFe)! WP Brings OUT The Worst Liver WurtZ Parts of Me! I am trying to Be KIND! But WP is turning this into a fukkkin STRUGGLE! I MAY AS WELL BE BACK IN IRAQ! LIFE WAS SO MUCH EASIER THEN! WP is Pissin’ Me The FUK OFF! hAVE I failed to MENTION TODAY How MUCH I HATE WP??????

My Girl!

Dedicated

To

That

Bitch

I admire

for

Her

Courage

My Girl!

Cordelia!

I LOVE HER

I use a lot.

A lot of

Profanity

What can I say?

I am a Texan / Sailor

Or a Sailor / Texan

‘Tis my nature.

Never mean to offend.

Perhaps I should mend

My speech a little.

Naw!

Fuck that!

***

From ‘Lear’:

CORDELIA:

“Unhappy that I am, I cannot heave

My heart into my mouth. I love your majesty

According to my bond, no more nor less.”

LEAR:

“How, how, Cordelia? Mend your speech a little,

Lest you may mar your fortunes.”

“Daddy! Me ”Fortunes’ Goy (Lil Lenny-Jew Humor there–if you don’t catch the ref—you need not be HERE!)

mY fukkin’g ‘fortunes never existed! marred long fukkin’ time ago!” Married some other

ASSHOLE!

NEVER CAUGHT Her NAME!

NOT THAT THAT WOULD MATTER! FUK Her1 FUK HER! FUCK THE WORLD!

STOP! THIS GREYhOUND!

i’M GETTIN’ OFF!

Just for FUCKIN’ FUN

Because

I’m

a

MORON!

Street Cred: Julie Nolke

I FUKKIN’ LOVE HER!

No One Ub=derstns

My

Sins-of-Humor

This makes me

Sad!

Why

Do

I wasste

MY

Finitte

Time?

Castin’

Pearls

At

Swime?

Swim’en”

With

Bow-legg’d

wimmens!

(I really need to be….put down! For The Sake of hUMANITY — OR at LEAST That FRAGILE Future of What Pipe Dreams it fkkin’ harbors for its lame-ass-self…. shit! Ninety-nine and some chge of all creatures who ever walked or swam on this fukkin’ planet have gone xe-fukkin’ stink! You tink Homo-Sapiens are “special? Well a wink ias as good as a nod to a bling fuckin’ horse!

Some

Asshole

Out

in

:”Radio-

Land

Needs

to “Hip”

Me!

Becuz

I am doin’

This

Shit

in

My

tireless

Effort

To

Fucking

“Entertaine

Yer

Dumb

Assesses!

Please

Believer

When

I

say,

I have

Better

shit

I

i Could do

To

Occupy

My

Fucking

MIND

But

I love

to

try

to

brighten

Your day!

In

My

Simp,ly

Way!

I fukkin’

work

REAL FUKKING

HARD

at

IT

goggamn it!

I work real hard for the money!

That money

I need so

desparately

Need

But

would

Never

Ever!

Ask

You

For!

I suppose

All I would love

Is a

Little

Simlple

“Fuckin’ Thank – You”

mAYBE JUST once per year!

What do that cost you?

A fucking

Mouse miss-fire?

It is not my desire to write in a fuckin’ vacuum!

I am here to try to make you laugh!

Spend the time!

Drop a

fukkin’ dime

But….

Honestly!

I don’t

Give a shit

I write for me

The rest of y’all

can

go get

wrecked!

I won’t miss

Y’all!

For

What you

are

Trying


To

Fucking

DO!

I do NOT

Fuck about!

I am

SMART!

i HAVE been

’round

The fuckin’

Whurl!

Three

Fukkin’

Times!

Do

Y’aa

Think

I

Cannot

Better Find

Ways

To

Waste

My

Fukking time?

And my MIND?

BUT I LOVE

MY READERS!

ALL FIVE OF YOU!!!!

Yeah! I know I’m an asshole!

Git over

That!

Or Git away from me!

I aint

lookin’ for your

fukkink’ smyan-me!

Go on!

Be a FUCKING

PHOTOGRAPH!

I’LL Frame you

And

HANG

You

On

My

“I love Me Wall”

Then

Everytime I see

I

See

you

I

will

Laugh

My

Fuckin’

Ass

Off!

Do you honestly

Wish

me

Dead?

Pretty

Sure

I can

fullfill

That

Vain

Fantasy you have!

Fuck all of this!

I AM SO

SICK

OF

LANCE!

HE AIN’T FIT TO LIVE

WITH!

JUST CALL ME

“HUD!”

gODDAMMMMMNIT!

And…..

In

closing

Let

Me

Say

This

About

This!!!!

“It ain’t

Easy

Bein’

Lance”

And that

is

All

I

got

To

say

About

That!

I do realize

I have

Lost

My fukkin’

Mind!

But

I will

Find it

Again

SometimeIt

Was here

Just a minute ago

Could not

Have

Strayed

Far!

Maybe

I

Just

miss-placed

In

My Pocket!

“Insaniity”

is

JUST

A

Scare

Word

For

Cowards!

God-Fuckin-Zilla

Crit Drinker!

I wish I Were Fukkin’ GAY!

(Don’t Worry–GIRLS–I ain’t!)

But I FUKKIN’; LOVE YOU Crit Drinker Man! I fukkin’ LOVE YOU!

MY MAN! YOU NAIL IT EVER’ FUKKIN’ TIME! GODDAMN FUKKIN’ DAMN!

My mind is FUKKIN’ GONE!

I’m REALLY sORRY

kids!

Just joshin’

I AIN’T SORRY

fer

SHIT!

i’M a cunt!

Love

That

‘Bout me!

****

i’LL GET TO THE Vid Creds Once I awake

FROM MY

Coma

‘Cause

I

NEVER

Fail

To

Give

Credit

When

Fukkin’ du du du

And

FU

Dice!

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