No Names Have Been Changed To Protect The Innocent,
‘Cause They Ain’t None To Be Found Up-In-He’ah.
Well, At Least I showed Up
“Been Around The World–Twice–
Seen Two White Whales Fuk”
And I Could Shoot Straight
My Only Saving Grace!
I am more than quite certain Y’all have been chompin’ at the bit to understand how BUD/s (SEAL) Classes are ‘Formed Up’ in
I am here to ‘Educate’ You
Yer Welcome in Advance.
Back when I got my ‘Suicide Chit’ approved (second time) to ‘Attend BUD/s’ Training—Second Attempt.
I was floating about off the Coast of San Dog—Having Completed My ‘Round-The-Whurl’ ‘Cruise—Love Boat, That Weren’t, but that is a different Post…
Here is how it ‘Works:’
Three or so weeks B4 ‘Class-Up’ Day, all the ‘Stragglers’ an’ Wanna-Be’s Come Descending upon Coronado/ Nav Spec-Warfare Command.
To ‘Kill’ the Time, and to ensure we don’t get ‘fat’, we are assigned a BUD/s Instructor to-keep-our Minds-‘Occupied.‘
We get wet an’ Sandy.
Just so we NEVER Forget why we showed up in-this-first-Place.
My “New” Class—One-Five-Eight, (Please Allow Me to Digress for a moment): My Class, One-Four Oh No! Was a ‘Summer’ Class–‘Bout One-Hundred ‘Poly-Wogs–Of Which 25 Graduated. My Class, One-Five Eight, A ‘Winter Class’ –Two years Later, Start, ‘Bout Seventy-Five– Graduated about 18–Sadly, I was NOT One Amongst Those MEN)
Ed. Note Winter Classes Are ALWAYS smaller. Only A Fool Would Willingly Attend a Winter BUD/s Class
Class 158 Had a contingent of Annapolis Officers
‘Shit-Birds’—As My USS Callaghan Master Chief Gunner Lovingly Referred to them.
Well, these Azzholes Were ALL Gung Ho—To Steal The USMC Vernac.
The Sunday, B4 We were to ‘Class-up On Monday, SEAL Tradition Demands a ‘Hair-Cut ‘Party’
We gather ‘round and we shave our heads.
To keep the sand and the bull-shit to a minimal.
Kegs O’ Beer, et cetera are imbibed.
It is a ‘Tradition, doan-cha-know?
The day before our ‘Hair-Cut Party,’ The Shit-Birds—er… Officers—Thought it would be ‘Great Fun’ To Print-Up Some Flyers to Throw at the Beach Babes as we did our last ‘Pre-Training’ Four-Mile Beach Run.
The Flyers Read:
“Come Join The Haircut Party”
Future SEALs From
“Class One-Five Eight”
Behind The BUD/s Barracks,
Having already ‘Been to BUD/s and an alumnus of Class One-Forty,
I knew this
We Did our Last Beach Run and these Idiot Officers (In SEAL Training The Shit-Birds Do EveryThang The Enlisted Men Do)
The Idiot Shit Birds, threw out their lame-ass flyers at every Beach-Babe we encountered during our Final Beach Run of ‘Pre-Training’, Always Shouting out,
WAY BAD IDEA!
Natch, The BUD/s Instructors Got Wind of this!
There are things and there are things one can do while attending BUD/s Training.
Assuming you will ‘Graduate’ is Never one-of-them.
Survival is just enuff.
“Oh God! Please Just Letz Me Make Just one-more-Day!”
“The Only Easy Day Was Yesterday:
The day we ‘Classed-Up, One of the Bud/s Instructors Waved around one of our ‘Flyers’
Does not even come close.
We Paid for That.
My Twice Failure At BUD/s
Has Forever defined Me as a ‘
If You Have NEVER Tested Your Limitations in-this-fashion,
I PITY You:
You Have NOT Yet ‘Lived’
Best of BUD/s Instructors
To Be continued…