All the lettuce is brown

And the milk

is

Gray

So I ran away!

Because shit like brown, pulsating, alive lettuce frightens me. I prefer my lettuce dead, not running about, chasing me.

And gray milk?

Don’t think so!

Not appealing to me.

Been there.

Done that.

In Iraq.

Never again.

No Sir. No Ma’am!

My Life?

I’m lovin’ it!

Wanna keep it.

Alive.

Wanna keep my life… alive.

Spend your pity on someone else.

But first call in an air-strike on the lettuce–for me–thanks– ‘preciate Ya!

I will survive.

Thank You

Drive Thru

Better Version Found Below

P.S., I Love You Michelle

Cali-Dreamin’ and Schemin’

Vid Cred: Thefreddy Show

***

Added Bonus Reference

“P.S., I love you.” You. You. You. (Michelle, My Belle.)