“Don’t Rain Shit On My Parade”

“If someone takes a spin it’s me and not you.”

I Adore Barbara. (But You Faithful, Regular Readers Already Know This)

The version I wanted, but WordPress is stupid.

“Three A.M., it’s me again.”

Three A.M. and I was in the middle of a dream about ‘Shit River’ in Ologapo City, Philippines. (Freud would’ve loved me)

Then I woke up.

Woke up to a very un-dreamy-like smell of real shit. Real potent shit. Horrible smelling shit. Knock a buzzard off a shit wagon smelling shit.

I was living in an old two-story house in Commerce. Just outside my bedroom was the walk-in closet where I kept all the clothes I owned. I have never owned much in the way of clothes, by the way.

I heard something dripping like rain behind the door, but it wasn’t raining outside. I opened the door and sure as shit, shit was raining down from the ceiling.  All over my clothes. Spattering on the floor. My Chow Mix doggie, Tizzy, was obviously responsible.


I went around the corner, and there  he was  in that dog-taking-a-shit posture at the top of the stairway: Obviously with a really bad case of the doggie drizzling shits.

Took me until seven a.m. to clean up the shit and wash all my clothes.

I called in sick to work telling my boss,

“I feel like shit.”

11 thoughts on ““Don’t Rain Shit On My Parade”

  1. This is one of those “timeless” posts I do love.
    I would snip a favorite quote from this one, but then I’d have to copy and paste the whole thing into your comment box. 😀

  2. Good Mornin’ Tela!
    (Try wakin’ up to a shit storm!)
    Uh… sincerely hope you never have to…)
    Thanks for dipping in.

  3. Just fillin’ Gaps in my writing.

    Paulie: [talking about Adrian] You like her?
    Rocky: Sure, I like her.
    Paulie: What’s the attraction?
    Rocky: I dunno… she fills gaps.
    Paulie: What’s ‘gaps’?
    Rocky: I dunno, she’s got gaps, I got gaps, together we fill gaps.

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