ASSHOLES! SLAMMING DOORS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT

And Therefore Disrupting My State of Somnambulistic Glorious Oblivious Glee.

Just trying to catch a few Z’s here.
Slamming Doors!
Why??? What the fuck??? Why must you do this???
I live here in the Lion’s Den Apartments as quiet as a Church Mouse.
I know how to open and close a fucking door without awakening the dead.
Because I RESPECT my neighbors. And their right to peace and quiet.
Apparently I am THE ONLY ONE who exhibits this level of RESPECT!

****
To my LOUD – ASS, Inconsiderate Neighbors:
YOU ARE ALL ASSHOLES!!!

Go FUCK Yourselves!

But please endeavor to do it quietly

Thanks in advance

ASSHOLES!

Otherwise…

Ram it, Ram it, Ram it up your Poop Chute

NYC (Or CNN) Or Le Both, Ruined My New Year’s Eve Experience!

I LOVE NYC (or at least my fantasy nostalgic version of it from The Forties)
For Lance, The New Year Only Begins when New York City drops that Big Ball in Times’ Square.
This year they ‘Dropped the Proverbial Ball.”

(Or did drop the Actual Beautiful Big Shiny Ball–I honestly don’t know–Because–CNN)

And chose to broadcast fucking car commercials instead.
Fuck you NYC! I am finally so OVER You!
(I am gonna remain in Texas.)
IF they did actually literally drop the Big Ball, fuck you CNN because you did NOT SHOW it.
Fucked up my New Years’ EVE Experience
Fuck you CNN!
(If anyone can find a video of the Ball Drop from tonight, 2020, if there actually is one, please send it to me—I wanna see it)
I am so pissed that I don’t even wanna watch Lame-Ass Don Lemon get drunk.

(What a Fucking IDIOT Moron HE is, but THAT IS A DIFFERENT POST)

From a recent Facefuk Post of Mine:

“I CANNOT wait to watch DON LEMON make a complete and absolute ass/fool of himself tonight.

He never fails to ‘deliver.’  And make me LMFAO!

(Watching CNN ‘do’ NEW YEARS EVE has become a Lance Marcom ‘Family Tradition.’)”

Fuck it!

The Magic is GONE!
Not a propitious beginning for 2021!
I fear we are gonna be more properly FUCKED than we already are….
We got No Karma to cash in.

The below is a powerfully, passionate, Magical rendition of one of my all-time favorite songs.
Way to Go Liza!

“Liza with A ‘Z’”

(Only ‘true’ Liza Fans will Catch the reference)
Bravo!
I have always loved you ‘Lisa’…

Opps! Sorry! Oh of course, only real Liza fans will get the joke.
(But of course, you already know that)

OK. Just gonna throw this in for reference (This post is all over the place. Unlikely I will ever ‘come back’ and clean it up)

Anyway… more on Liza:

“Liza with a ‘Z’. Not ‘Lisa’ with an ‘S’”
–Liza
(Old album of hers that I wore out listening to over and over and over and over again.)

I love you Liza!

This Rare Time, The ‘Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Sciences’

Got it Right:

Life is a Fucking Cabaret.
Try Living it!

*******

Oh! And lest I forget to drop this in:

I also laugh my ass off watching these Bobbsey Twin Idiots:
Andy Cohen and Anderson Cooper
CNN, You are a FUCKING JOKE!
I don’t want to be unkind, but these two assholes wear me out with their fake, forced banter.

FUCK YOU CNN!

I drop in something more “Happy” and “Upbeat” Below

FUCK TWENTY-TWENTY VISION!

(I have reading glasses–I can see the truth)

FUCK 2020!

(And YOUR lack of Compassion for Humanity)

“Hey Twenty-Twenty One!

Don’t make me angry.

You won’t like me when I’m angry.”

(Just trust me on this and keep your mouth shut and your ears open)

And of course, I am the quintessential ‘Dancing Clown’

(This should go without saying)

There has never been, nor never will be, a woman in ‘my life’–virtual or otherwise–that I will love more than Joni.

And if you have ‘groan-tired’ of me bangin on about Joni you are visiting the wrong blog.

“Cherchez la femme
Whenever love comes around
Someone’s a dancin’ clown
Cherchez la femme
Whenever hearts start to pound
Someone’s a dancin’ clown”

C’est moi Joni.

C’est Moi!

A Dancing clown.

C’est Moi!

More Joni may be found here (If you give a fuck, that is)

Annie! Don’t Get Your Gun—We Cool–Lah Dee Dah

I grew bored watching “Independence Day

Couldn’t finish it. Was just wasting my time.

I love sci-fi and of course I have seen this film already a few times. It was better years ago, but it just does not age well. So I pulled the plug on it and moved on.

I selected a real ‘quality’ movie that never ages for me, to re-watch:

“Annie Hall.”

(More cerebral—smarter—better. So much better–Perfection film.)

I called up Diane Keaton (I have her on ‘Speed-Dial’)

“Hey! Wanna come over for dinner and a movie? I have Annie Hall. queued up”

“Not one of my favorite films, you got anything else in your repertoire? Like ‘Star Wars’ or something? But sure. Just let me grab a cab. What’s for dinner?”

“Lobster” I said “And you don’t wanna know what else is for dinner, but you are on the dessert menu. Know that.”

“On my way,” she said, and hung up. Rather abruptly. Presumably to grab that cab. Or crab. Or lobster.

I was gonna tell her, before she hung up, that this was no BYOL PARTY -‘Bring your own lobster.’

I had it all, already ‘sorted’

(I hoped)

You must watch the below, otherwise my post just falls all apart

Bonus Clip Below (Strangely related)

“You gots to be mo’ careful.”

More Shit That Makes Me Happy

Maybe it will make you happy too

Related

Credit: Pharrell Williams

Credit: Sam O’Nella

You gots to be mo’ careful:

Credit: Sam O’Nella

Credit: Sam O’Nella

Emmylou is so drop-dead beautiful (and so ‘feisty’ in this performance. I love love LOVE her!)

Linda goes to Mars and leaves her mind behind.

(I can certainly relate)

One More from Beautiful Emmylou:

Best lyric from this song:
“It ain’t no time for lengthy speeches.”

Or this one: “There ain’t no way to stop the water”

(It’s a ‘photo finish.’)

Such a wonderful song. I love you Emmylou!

Oh Domino’s!

So I ordered some more nasty food from Domino’s.

Delivery gal shows up with my order.

“You got a receipt for me to sign?”

“No. You’re good,” she said

“That’s a shame, ‘cause I wanted to add in a cash tip for your prompt diligent delivery service. But since I cannot do that, here is a better tip:

“Don’t bet the ponies.”

(She was too young to appreciate the Joke or the Mafia Reference.)

She just looked at me as if I were from Mars (Which is actually my “Home Planet”)

I am an Illegal Alien here ya know

(But I have applied for my ‘Little Green Man’ Green Card.)

***

Update:

Got an email from ICE today

It read: “Application Pending. Meantime, watch your ass.”

Fucking Bureaucracy!

“Linda & Lance Go To Mars” (And They Lived Happily Ever After)

Yet one more stupid FaceBork Post:

“I gotta repost this post and allow me to enlighten and explain to you why:

At least thirty-three percent of the songs are songs that JOhnny Whitley reminded me of or turned onto for the very first time.

Thank you Johnny:  My good, great newly re-discovered friend from “The Old HG Daze”.

Thank you Johnny. You have brought joy back into my life.

Joy was missing in action.

Now she has returned.

“Welcome back Joy. I have missed you.”

(Muse sitting on the ‘Nasty Couch’ looks up and glares at me)

I am sincere in this statement .

You have not  an idea.

But actually, I’d wager you do.

“Linda Went to Mars.”

And Lance was on that same spaceship….

We were shit-mates

Me and Linda.

And we ENJOYED  the ride.

We did not so much enjoy our “arrival”

You see…

Life is all about the “journey”

Never about the final destination arrival.

Very much so

MERRY  CHRISTMAS”

Oh shit!

I made an esoteric reference

Here is the link:

Shit that makes me happy

Added value: