WASTED

Perfect!

Gonna add this to my Life’s Soundtrack:

Soon available as a Box’d-Up Set

Available At Fine Book Stores Everywhere.

(If you have a time-machine)

But Now! However…. No!

Wait! No Fine Book Stores Left???”

No kinda, semi-fine Bookstores?”

No sorta-fine Bookstores?”

No Marginally Fine Bookstores?”

No Mediocre-Fine Bookstores?”

No Bargain – Basement Bookstores?”

“NO!”

Well… Fuck me Then! I Quit!”

“Lance, You are already Proper-Fucked!

And you can’t quit: you are an indentured

servant-tude—

Dude”

******

Try Amazon.

Free Shipping…If you have been ‘Primed.’

But ‘BYOP’– Bring Yer Own Pump.

************

“And I could have done so many things Baby

If I could only stop my mind

From wondering what I left behind

And from worrying about this wasted time.”

****

“Oh My God! What’s Happening to me?”

*************

Bonus Track:

BONUS BONUS DOUBLE BONUS TRACK:

Street Cred: JoniJourney

*************

Cheers Y’all!

******

“You don’t care much for a stranger’s touch, this far down the line.”

I’m afraid….

It’s all been wasted time.”

****

Yeah! I fucked up the lyrcs—Go ahead, ask me how many fuks I give.

I can save you from the Mathematical Pain:

Lance casually regards slide-rule.

Picks up same.

Works it.

“Ching! Ching! Ching! Bing!”

Lance regards the slide-rule….

.*******

Then announces:

Survey Says:

Zero!

Zero Fucks Given!

****

Thank You;

Drive through.

Dead Reckoning, Abusive Muse: This is the End

Video Credit: Christian Davies

Previous

I was not to be denied.

“Kate! Katherine! Muse!” I shouted, as I bounded from my computer chair over to her.

“I love you! Will you marry me or no? I must know!”

I stood in front of her, trembling.

She stood up, sidestepped the nasty coffee table, and walked up to face me at very close range.

She pierced me with those eyes. Looked down (almost sadly—I perceived—then took my hands into hers)

She looked back into my eyes and said,

“Lance, Baby, you understand I am not a real girl. You created me. I live in your mind and at your leisure.”

“Whaaaa?”

“Yes. I am a figment of your mind. Does not mean I don’t love you. I will always be here for you. And if you choose, I will love you. I will ‘write’ you, as far as you may write yourself. But ‘marry’?

I cannot.

You must write for YOU, and only for YOU.”

*********

She dropped my hands and sat back down on The Nasty Couch. Took a sip of Pinot, picked up her NY Times, took another sip of Pinot, and a drag off her Virginia Slims, and as if nothing had just happened, got back to being Her.

I retired to my writing chair. Sat there for some moments, tears welling, then smiled inside.

“She will always love me. She has no choice. It is all up to me,” I mused.

And then I got busy writing.

After some pregnant pauses…

“Hey Asshole! You better be writing something readable!” I heard from over my shoulder.

Yes! She loves me still!

                THE END

And Afterall:

Just to ‘Lighten’ the mood…

The Sudden Stark Realization That MS Muse Was Not Real…

Bummed Me The Fuck Out.

But I got over it.

Here is a PSA: DO NOT FUCK WITH ME

Some youngish Black Bitch knocked upon my door (at zero four)
Probably a whore
“Are you alright?” she asked. “I heard something.” (Which is Bullshit)
“Well, what did you hear?” I asked. She just rolled her eyes and walked away.
These ppl don’t know who they are attempting to fuck with: I’m crazy (and dangerous)
And I am packing: Big Hard Iron and Soft Lead. Which I will be more than happy to deposit into your head.. IF you are dumb enuff to fuck with me.
And trust me: I am a damn good shot. I never miss my intended target.

Julie and Julia

This is one of the most charming movies from ‘semi recent’ times.

It works on all levels. It is a delight to watch.

P.S. I love Amy Adams. Surprised? You shouldn’t be.

(Meryl Streep ain’t no slouch neither)

And of course, this movie is all about ‘writing’ which hits so close to home for me, your humble servant.

“I can write a blog. I have thoughts.”–Julie

Added Value:

******

The Real Julie Powell (Clik the link linked in below.)

And of course, She is a Native TEXAN

(Born in Austin)

Which makes her even more magical for me.

https://www.biography.com/writer/julie-powell

Ending song for this wonderfully, brilliantly done movie.

(Everything ‘works’ in this film)

It is Perfection

Vid Cred: Julia Tejero

*****

Bonus Cooking Scene Below

I drop this in

Just for the Grin

And for the Laughter Factor

Rhonda: Chapter Two and a Half

One night after some passionate love- making, I rolled over, looked at Rhonda and said,

“I think I’m falling in love with you.”

She rolled over and said,

“Don’t.”

How could this White – Trash Okie Woman possess such much subtle knowledge and inject it into my mind?

Of course, I fell even more madly in love with her after that.

I miss her.

I miss her smile.

And her Laughter

And her body

Lovely Muse-Chapter: I couldn’t care less. Guess how many fucks I give. Take your time. I got nothing BUT time.

Wake up call:

Love Ladonia:

“I like your twist, just stop tagging everything.”

I could not disagree. Nor agree more.

Thank you “Love Ladonia”

(I was fucking born there, by the fucking way. What claim to fame do you have? How dare you to have the brass balls and the unmitigated gall and temerity to

CALL ME OUT?!)

For helping me get over myself and come (bring?) me on back down to Earth Son.

From now until the END OF TIME I will NOT ‘Tag’ anyone. FOREVERMORE.

(Please and Thank You and You’re Fucking welcome.)

So sorry If I bothered you and for being an asshole..

I just try to brighten someone’s life.

If only for a brief moment in time.

That is my ‘goal.’ (“Who put these Ideas in your stupid head? Fuck were you not thinking?’ asks my Lovely Muse)

If you wanna ‘read’ me, from now on, search me out. Because I am done with doing the ‘Heavy Lifting.”

(At least I am gracious enough and Man Enuff to Admit when I am WRONG)

As opposed to some Rude ASSHOLES I have had the pleasure to ‘experience’ while just walking around trying to be a good man, during my short existence on this Fucking Planet Earth.

“Put your money on the table and drive it off the fucking lot… smartly.”

(Oh, and by the way, did I mention today, “WordPress you are STUPID?”)

And a fucking douche bag of a platform?

And you make my life more difficult than it already is.

And that is a challenging task, but some fucking how, you manage to pull it off.