Henry Le Five

This too (not so much about women)

Not my painful, plainful verbiage,

but …

Derek

What a modern science actor!

(And a really swell guy)

“Lance, there you go again…”

“Sorry! On with the show!”

“Oh for a muse…of fire!”

****************

I love Shakespeare. I love words. I love the simple fact that the only good advice my father once gave to me were the words out of his mouth: “Son, words have meaning and their coinage, well spend them well…”

Now… I am not that too heady. In fact, I am simple. Yet I do still love the coinage of a good phrase. Indeed I do.

Therefore, I leave you this. As all good Bloggers do, I desire a Stage! My Kingdom for a Stage!

Read… and… well…stay tuned.

And Kenneth Branagh At his Best

(Uh Oh! King Harry is pissed off!)

And Even Better

(and here, find the subtle wrath: you don’t wanna be these guys)

And Even More Better: “Once More Unto The Breach!”

And You Gotta Love This Guy: “In Thunder and in Earthquake”

 In my opinion this is Branagh’s finest movie

Henry The Fifth

The Abusive Muse

WAKE UP!”

“Whaaaa?”

“Wake the fuck UP!”

“Who are you?”

“Your Muse.”

“Oh, I thought You That Delirium Tremens Monster.”

“No. He will be around later. Right now you have me.”

“Okay. Something on your mind?”

“Yes. You need to get up and write.”

“I am sleepy.”

“Time enough to sleep when you’re dead.”

“Really? We gonna go there?”

“Get your ass up; plant your ass on that chair. Hit the keyboard. Write!”

“Don’t wanna.”

“’Want’ has nothing, and everything to do with this.”

“Okay.”

To Be Continued….

Part two here

‘Annie Hall’ That’s All! The Best Movie Of All Time. Annie! Don’t Get Your Gun—We Cool? Lah Dee Dah

Annie Get Your Gun–Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better

(I Love Women)

Betty Hutton

(I Think)

***

“I can knit a sweater”

“I can fill it better”

Great Fuckin’ Line!

Vid Cred: RayinDC

Annie!

I grew bored watching “Independence Day”

Couldn’t finish it. Was just wasting my time.

I love sci-fi and of course I have seen this film already a few times. It was better years ago, but it just does not age well. So I pulled the plug on it and moved on.

I selected a real ‘quality’ movie that never ages for me, to re-watch:

“Annie Hall.”

(More cerebral—smarter—better. So much better–Perfection film.)

I called up Diane Keaton (I have her on ‘Speed-Dial’)

“Hey! Wanna come over for dinner and a movie? I have Annie Hall. queued up”

“Not one of my favorite films, you got anything else in your repertoire? Like ‘Star Wars’ or something? But sure. Just let me grab a crab. What’s for dinner?”

“Lobster” I said “And you don’t wanna know what else is for dinner, but you are on the dessert menu. Know that.”

“On my way,” she said, and hung up. Rather abruptly. Presumably to grab that cab. Or crab. Or lobster.

I was gonna tell her, before she hung up, that this was no BYOL PARTY -‘Bring your own lobster.’

I had it all, already ‘sorted’

(I hoped)

You must watch the below, otherwise my post just falls all apart

Bonus Clip Below (Strangely related)

“You gots to be mo’ careful.”

Crab Lady!

Vid Cred: K. Antoinette

And God-Fukkin’ Damn You To Hell Word-Press! It’s just me, Self-Deprecatin’. UBH: Cast of Caricatures

“Comphy Numb

Only Decent Performance This Asshole

Dee-Crapio

Ever Did

Better Romeo Below:

Motherfuck u Wp! Scroll the fuk down!

  1. Sal (Hispanic Marine) Gift of Gab and Excellent Sense of Humor “Sadder than a Midget with a Yo-yo.” His quote. Not mine.

  2. Lydia (Old and Gray and Grizzled Away—but wonderful)

  3. Michael (Big dude. ‘Bout thirty stone.) We called him “Pete”—not sure why

  4. Christine (Bat – shit crazy. And obnoxious. And a bitch–but just for one day. Then she found politeness. And then fit right in with our “in-crowd.”)

  5. Jacob— Junkie—young junkie—Always wearing a Nirvana T-Shirt–nuff said.

  6. Phil—Texan—issues he had—showed up drunk Day One and checked himself in. Not sure how that works, but whatever.

  7. Nino (My ‘Roommate’) Did not like him, but he was there, so, what ever-the fuck-ever.

  8. Kelsey (my favorite ‘broken’ one’—loved her) “Take the Mary Poppins Unbrella and fly the fuck out of town.”

  9. And of course,

  10. Yannah…

  11. “T” I mean, “Ethel, the Pirate’s Daughter.” And cheater at Black Jack (and life in general)

No doxing here.

Whoops!

Too late.

This “Story” is going somewhere.

I just need to line up the cast and crew.

Stand by…

But one last quote from Sal:

“Kids are like little drunk Midgets.”

I promised him I would steal that quote.

Now I have.

Promise fulfilled.

P.S. This piece was more fun to write than it will ever be fun to read.

You realize you have a problem when you laugh at your own jokes.

“Time to seek council Son.”

“I heard you were a drunkard’s drunkard.”

“Never when I’m working!”

“Give me my sin again.”

“You kiss by-the-book.”

(Brook???)

(I LOVE SHAKESPEARE!)

And Claire Has Such Wonderful,

Beautiful eyes….

And yes! My mind has departed for destinations unknown

“Lance, why do You Write so much about Women?” “I write what I know.” First Rule of Thumb: Write What You Know.

Catherine Zeta-Jones: Welsh Witch Who Stole My Heart (With a bit of Stevie on the side)

Or, I gots “Cat-Scratch-Catherine-Fever”

You decide.

I have been recently chastised for writing too much about women.

Well, fuck me!

What would you have me write about?

I am a Red-Blooded Texan-American Male who still has a pulse.

This is not abnormal behavior from such a man.

Well-documented how much I love/respect/admire/lust after women I find interesting/strong/sexy/attractive…

Need I go on?

No?

Well, thank you then.

Let’s get on with the show.

Catherine!

First time I ever saw her was in the movie “Entrapment”

Well, she surely ‘entrapped’ me and stole my heart.

(and some other parts of my anatomy—But I will spare you the details on that—suffice to say, I watched her in that movie five times in a row. All in one day)

And ever since, when I want to look / listen / drool / I revisit her.

And thanks to the magic of our age, our  wonderful internet age, I can satisfy my needs.

Ain’t much into porn, but I sure as shit am into women that I admire and if they are really beautiful… and smart…and talented…. and foreign… Welsh, Brit, French, Italian, Israeli, Kenyan, Oklahoma-en…

OK, not Okie—been there—done that—married that. Divorced that.

(Which was the worst mistake I ever made. Monumental fuck up on my part.)

Read more about it here. If’n ya wanna:

Screw it.

Moving on…

I am desperately trying to build a respectful tribute post to Catherine by showing you some stolen clips from the internet.

Thank you

Watch and then drive through.

***

“Sexy” as a word fails here.

There are no adequate words to describe this….

Entrap Me Baby!

Welsh Witch

Stevie Nicks

“Rhiannon rings like a bell through the night
And wouldn’t you love to love her?
Takes to the sky like a bird in flight
And who will be her lover?”

***

“All your life you’ve never seen
A woman taken by the wind
Would you stay if she promised you heaven?
Will you ever win?
Will you ever win?”

***

“Your life knows no answer”

“Dreams unwind
Love’s a state of mind”

Stevie, I love your hair.

A man could get lost in there.

Never to be seen again.

For those who like to ‘read more about it’:

Catherine Zeta-Jones was born September 25, 1969 in Swansea, Wales (and raised in the nearby town of Mumbles), the only daughter of Patricia (nee Fair) and David James “Dai” Jones, who formerly owned a sweet factory.

She attended Dumbarton House School (Swansea). Her father (the son of Bertram (1912-1970) and Zeta Davies Jones (1917-2008)) is of Welsh descent and her mother (the daughter of William (1921-2000) and Catherine O’Callaghan Fair (1920-2001) ) is of English, Irish, and Welsh ancestry.

Her brothers are David Jones (born 1967), a development executive, and Lyndon Jones (born 1972), who works at her production company. Her birth name was simply Catherine Jones, but she added her paternal grandmother’s name (“Zeta”) so as to stand out from the many other young women with the exact same name.

***

And Yes.

I have seen this one.

And I have read the book it was based upon:

And here is a fun fact:

Late one night…. dark and stormy—Some high school friends and I were stuck at a railroad crossing. There was a storm. It was fucking dark.

I had a paperback copy of the book in my hip pocket. I pulled it out and using a BIC cig lighter, read from it to my friends. Just to pass the time as the train took it’s sweet time to get the fuck out of our way…

Scared the shit out of my friends.

(They were not familiar with the story)

I really enjoyed that moment and was sad when the train finished going by…. I had not even gotten to the ‘good’ part yet.

And I have seen the original movie…

Yada

Yada

Yada

But this ain’t about that.

That belongs in one of my ‘Film Posts”

She ‘Haunts’ My Feeble Mind:

Verily Related:

Bonus!

Catherine Fever!

Re-Writ Re-Post. Yeah So What? “Look like the Innocent Flower, But be the Serpent under’t” or “Come you Spirits, That tend on mortal thoughts, Unsex me Here.”

Out Of All Shakespearean Female Characters

This Cowboy Finds Lady Macbeth

The Most Captivating

The Most Fascinating

The Most Stimulating

The Most Everlasting

Francesca Annis, The Best Lady Macbeth

Ever! and Forever!

***

Blond Ambition:

***

“Take The Dagger”

She Didn’t Verbalize That. She Didn’t Have To

Just Look Into Her Eyes. Could You Say ‘No?”

I Know I couldn’t.

***

MACBETH

     My dearest love,

Duncan comes here tonight.

LADY MACBETH

     And when goes hence?

MACBETH

Tomorrow, as he purposes.

LADY MACBETH

     O, never

Shall sun that morrow see!

Your face, my thane, is as a book where men

May read strange matters. To beguile the time,

Look like the time. Bear welcome in your eye,

Your hand, your tongue. Look like th’ innocent flower,

But be the serpent under ’t. He that’s coming

Must be provided for; and you shall put

This night’s great business into my dispatch,

Which shall to all our nights and days to come

Give solely sovereign sway and masterdom.

MACBETH

We will speak further

LADY MACBETH

Only look up clear.

To alter favor ever is to fear.

Leave all the rest to me

***

“Make Thick My Blood”

“Unsex Me Here”

***

Why do I hold Lady Macbeth in such high esteem one may ask?

Isn’t it patently obvious?

She is cunning. She is manipulative. She is strong. (Much stronger than her husband)

“Screw your courage to the sticking-place, And we’ll not fail.”

***

She is intelligent.

She is ‘ambition-on-steroids’.

She is resolute.

She is brave.

***

She is Affectionate and Loving.

(Yes! Oh Yes She Is!—To her husband)

***

She is loyal (The whole world of her ambition is her husband)

***

She is broken.

She is madness. (In mind and in deed)

“Out! damned spot! One, two, — why, then ‘tis time to do’t. Hell is murky. Fie, my lord, fie, a soldier and afeard? What need we fear who knows it, when none can call our power to account? – Yet who would have thought the old man to have had so much blood in him.”

***

She is Beautiful.

She is Beautiful.

She is So Very Beautiful

***

In very many respects, she reminds me of Shonnie.

***

But now she is gone.

“Out, Out Brief Candle”

***

And now for something completely different…

Just a little levity.

‘Tis Good For The Soul.

Street Cred For Vid: Wisecrack

***

Author’s Note (And Two-Cents):

Yes, I know.

Roman Polanski is an Asshole.

So What?

Anyone who ‘reads me’ knows my position on ‘artists’ and art.

If you do not, here is the ‘short’ version:

“I don’t give two cups of warm spit about what they (artists, creators, movie stars, entertainers, et cetera) do off camera, off stage, away from the set, away from the recording booth. Or whatever they choose to do while in their boudoirs.

All I care about is what they create.

Does it enrich my life?

Does it entertain me?

Does it educate me?

Does it make me laugh?

Does it make me cry?

Does it move me?

Or Does It Waste My Time?

These are the only measures of worth I employ.”

***

Anything Else IS A WASTE of my Mental Energy and My Time.

And My Time is the Most Valuable Thing I Own.

Or as we say in Texas (Usually about Land, but it fits even better in this context):

“Time, get all you can.

Keep all you can.

They ain’t making any more of it.”

That door swings both ways:

So, I hope I have NOT wasted YOUR Time.

Cheers,

–Lance

More Two Cents Worth Regarding Art and Artists Here:

Below Please Find The Relevant Text If You Do Not Want To Follow The Link To The Complete Post Above.

***

Now I am cognizant of the fact that there are myriad ‘Madonna Haters’ out there in ‘Radio Land.’

Here is My Philosophy, (Well-Documented in some of my posts) and some advice:

You don’t have to love the ‘artist-person’ to love the art. There are lots of performers I detest because of their off-stage persona or antics, or just piss-poor personality in general.

But… That does not stop me from enjoying and appreciating their art.

I do not give two shits about their politics, arrogance, religion, sexual preferences, et cetera. If their art entertains and enriches my life, I am good with them.

On the other hand, they can be as wonderful and charming as all get out, but if they have no true performance talent, I move on.

Here is the advice part for anyone out there who may need it:

Do not be so narrow and small-minded, and full of your own morality that you prevent yourself from enjoying good art.

***

Want a Second Opinion?

Watch this from Critical Drinker:

That loss is yours.

And yours alone.

Believe me, the artists, the great ones especially, don’t give a shit if you boycott them or not.

Try to remember:

“Life is a Cabaret”

Enjoy it while it lasts. Don’t deny yourself value and enjoyment in your life just because some great performer pisses you off due to their persona while off-stage.

***

Cheers Again!