Henry Le Five

This too (not so much about women)

Not my painful, plainful verbiage,

but …

Derek

What a modern science actor!

(And a really swell guy)

“Lance, there you go again…”

“Sorry! On with the show!”

“Oh for a muse…of fire!”

****************

I love Shakespeare. I love words. I love the simple fact that the only good advice my father once gave to me were the words out of his mouth: “Son, words have meaning and their coinage, well spend them well…”

Now… I am not that too heady. In fact, I am simple. Yet I do still love the coinage of a good phrase. Indeed I do.

Therefore, I leave you this. As all good Bloggers do, I desire a Stage! My Kingdom for a Stage!

Read… and… well…stay tuned.

And Kenneth Branagh At his Best

(Uh Oh! King Harry is pissed off!)

And Even Better

(and here, find the subtle wrath: you don’t wanna be these guys)

And Even More Better: “Once More Unto The Breach!”

And You Gotta Love This Guy: “In Thunder and in Earthquake”

 In my opinion this is Branagh’s finest movie

Henry The Fifth

Pygmalion-Like, I Created Her & Then I Promptly Fell Madly In Love With Her. Go Figure.

And it has occurred at me: I never ‘gave’ her a Proper Name.

I am gonna go with ‘Katherine.’

Works for me (And Hopefully, Her)

I was at my computer, banging out my latest travesty of prose.

As Was instructed/demanded by MS Muse.

Finished it and hit The ‘Publish’ Button.

(I NEVER allow Anyone, not even MS Muse, to proof-read nor comment or my so-called ‘work’ before I cast it out into the endless sea that is the Internet.)

Muse will certainly be the first to read it and then as she is reading it, I’ll stand by for heavy rolls and unhappy critique.

But this post is not about that.

I leaned back in my chair, cracked open another beer, and glanced over my shoulder at MS Muse.

She had not yet gotten the “Moron-Writer-Just-Posted Alert.”

She was preoccupied with working her NYT Crossword

(Using an INK PEN! Vice a PENCIL like all the rest of us Mortals. Who has confidence enough to do that? She does.)

As I was staring at her, she apparently became aware.

She put down her New York Times, stared right back at me and said,

“Now what?”

I cleared my throat, mustered all the courage and moxie I had remaining, and said,

“Will You Marry Me?”

It didn’t exactly go like this, but this here/below, is

MY FANTASY.

I can concoct it as however it serves my wont.

Or ‘want.’

Call it ‘Creative License.’

If you must.

To be continued…

P.S., I am in love with Carly Simon & Emma Thompson

(As if Regular Readers Did Not Already Know This)

She(S) was / is a bit of a slut,

But ain’t we all?

(I warmly embrace my ‘slutiness.’ It defines me)

Carly’s Slutiness Makes Me Love Her Even That Much More!

She is for reals!

******

Sorry Carly!

I should not have called you a slut–I live in a Glass House—

Casting Stones is Not Wise on My Part.

Yes! I Am For Real!

Lo Siento Mi Vida. Do NOT Look At This! Let Alone READ It! This Post Is All Fukked Up! Half The Thumb-Nails Don’t Even Show Up!

“TRIGGER WARNING!

This Post is Obnoxious & Insulting,

But It Accurately Depicts My Frame of Reference

At The Time I Wrote it.

I NEVER Lie to Y’all. –Updated! Had to Add Some Linda at The End–Cannot Believe I Forgot! This Post is all Fucked UP. Guess What? I No Longer Dare to CArE! Don’t GIvE A sHiT! fUcK IT! “Hearts are like AssHoles; eVer’one gOts one!”

Wasted Time

I Honestly Don’t Know Why I Waste My Finite Time. I Pull Together All Kinds of Poignant Videos. No One Watches.

God Forbid Someone Comments!

Takes Some Time

Drops a Thin Dime

Says

“Thank You! You Made Me Laugh!”

Oh Hell NO! Cannot Be Bothered To Spend A Fuckin’ Mouse Clik!

Fuck All Y’all!

And I Sincerely Mean That!

“All The Y’alls, Y’all”

Vid Share Cred: Chris Spags

Content Creator: K Ryan Jones (I think)

And of Course The Mesmerizin’

Connie Britton

George Don’t Give A Shit

He is My Spirit Animal

George Ref’ d The Magic Words!

He SAID

“Bobby Darin”

“Mack the Knife”

Anyone who reads me, knows most of my shit is bullshit about women! is about women–my relationships with women. I love women. This is well-documented.

I have broken lots of hearts.

Lots of good woman hearts.

My heart, my one one, my only one, has been broken too.

I should take better care of it.

Try to Look out for it.

More.

More earnestly.

More diligently.

Less carelessly.

Heart Broke.

More times than I wish to recount.

But.

I always manage

to sailor on.

And I will.

Continue.

For

Ever.

This is cruel.

And

BRILLIANT

Billie Holiday

A National Treasure

Tragic Ophilia

Cred for Vid: jakuerika

Billie H is the broad singing; but you knew that already….

*********

And crude.

But it is how I choose to survive.

I honestly have no choice in the matter.

Yeah! I’m An Asshole!

Streetcar My Desire

*********

If you do not get my sense of humor, you are in the wrong place.

And you need to leave.

Now.

Right Now.

Right Fuckin’ Now

And In Haste

Hasta La Vista!

Lo Siento Mi Vida

Linda!

In My Humble Opinion, This is One Of The Most Beautiful, Wonderful Songs Ever Performed and Performed By The Most Beautiful, Talented Woman in the World

(Sorry Joni–Forgive me later–I’ll buy you lunch–I Promise.)

The Thane of Cawdor Sleeps No More. Or… Which Witch? “She Turned Me Into A Newt”– “A Newt?!” “I got Better” (And Hey Word-Press! Why Cannot I Properly Edit This?)

I Got Better

***

For all you Shakespeare fans Out There In Radio-Land:
This is worth your time investment.

Regicide

As An Honorably Served Military Man:

This Scene Pains Me

***

Graham Nash & Stephen Stills – Military Madness (Live)

***

Lance is Broken. Shit-A-Brick!: “Wonderful World of Worthy Writers.”

We are, each of us, all of us, complicated, worthy people, full of brightly brilliant ideas, passionate passions, boundless potentials and infinite possibilities. We have our Stories. We want to Share Our Stories.

We are “Writers,” which makes us just a little bit different, special, and weird.

(In a very good way)

We each have our own personal foibles, strengths, weaknesses, levels of humanity, quirks, degrees of sanity, degrees of insanity, levels of intelligence, variances of meanness, variances of kindness, oscillating magnitudes of mood, cascades of creativity, brilliance of brevities, vacillating verbosities, and on and on…

In short we are all individuals possessing something unique that only each unique one amongst us can share.

And THAT, My Dear “Special Writer-Friends” is what makes this vocation so Magical.

And so very fulfilling and so very rewarding.

***

Ninety-Nine Percent of my Writing is Autobiographical.

And I know from visiting the Blogs, that most of my Fellow Writers, at the very least, Write a good deal of same.

For me, I find it healthy and cathartic.

Your mileage may vary.

But remember Socrates’ renowned statement,

“The unexamined life is not worth living.”

Content Credit: “School of Life”

***

Some of us have our own personal agendas.

Some of us do not.

Yet, We, each and every one of us, is worthy: Agenda Full, or Agenda Empty.

Honestly, I am fresh out (of agendas) currently, but I am shopping for one to rent.

***

Upon ‘Sober’ Reflection…

(Yes! I have Quit for Good, The Drinking–Having Chosen Life Over Death Because I still have years and years and years worth of shit I want, need, to write and to share.)

Yes! Upon sober reflection, I realize I DO have an agenda after all: My ‘agenda’, modest as it may appear, is to spread a little joy and deliver a bit of enrichment into the people’s lives who honor me by investing some of that most valuable, finite commodity we ALL share:

“Time”

I work very diligently not to waste even one single moment of yours, because there is no such thing as a ‘Money-Back-Time-Guarantee’.

“Love It, Or We’ll Refund All Your Time Spent. With Interest. No Questions Asked! Guaranteed!”

Sorry. Don’t work that way.

Some of us are Brilliant, Talented Writers.

Some us are just getting started and may need advice from time to time. Just ask; you will most likely get an inbox overflowing full.

“So, You Want To Be A Writer?”

This is a “Must Watch”

If You are a Wanna-Be Writer, That Is

Street Cred for Vid: Shea, Et al.

***

Some of us are polished, published, poets, prose-writers, playwright professionals, some of us are copywriters, some of us are even journalists, some of us are a combination of a few or of them all.

Some of us have genetic talent.

Some of us must work harder at it.

Most of us suffer Writer’s Block from time to time:

Content Credit: “Ivan Kander”

***

But the fact that we are all here, grinding out word after word,

Proves our worth and our respect for our craft.

And the Fact that you are reading these words right now proves you have respect for your fellow writers in Our Wonderful Writer’s Community

I think what my ‘message’ is trying (and most likely failing) to eloquently say… is that I love the writers in my fellow writer community.

We all have worth.

(Well except for that worthless schmuck who don’t like Lenny Bruce… and Y’all know I am even just kidding on that.)

“Thank You Mask Man”

Video Share Credit: ThankYouMaskedMan1

Kinda

Not Really!

Never kid About Comedy; Comedy is Serious Business!

Never Joke About Lenny; Lenny is Serious Business!

And if Y’all Think I’m a Serious Person, and not joking, I am gonna purchase you a one-way ticket to ‘The Re-Education, Never-Take-Lance-Too-Seriously Gulag Facility’, recently re-modeled and up-graded–it has running water now.

And Gulag Goulash Every Saturday Night.

–Lance, Your Humble & Worthy Servant, Who Loves, and Respects, All of ‘Y’alls’.

*****

Bonus ‘Added Value’

Shakespeare & Marlowe:

Credit: Miramax

Poem For “Ethel”–Fake Name–UBH: Interlude

Black Hair

Black Eyes

Bright Smile

Great Thighs

Wily Words From Her Mouth

Gave No Pause

Left No Doubt

Words Delivered With Such Charm

Better Watch Out

You’ll Be Disarmed

Your Walls Came Crashing Down

Your Weapons On The Ground

She Was Standing There

(Laughing At My Folly)

Laughing Everywhere

You May As Well Surrender Right There

Taking Me Aside, She Said

“I’ll Never Be Your Bride.

“But You Knew This All Along.”

She Left Me With A Song

And Made Me Smile Again

Then Left Me With a Fact:

“I Cheats At Blackjack”

(Inside Joke—Will Elaborate On This In A Future Post As We Delve Deeper Into This Odyssey)

“A Broad River Divides My Lovers: As Unchangeable As Nature.”

Best Carly Song Ever NOT Written by Kris Kristofferson. I misspoke.

Here is the one I meant (Written by Kris):