Stimulate Me Bitch!

Woo-Hoo!

Wu Flu!

You have ‘Stimulated’ Me!

“Per your instructions, we are notifying you of the following

Account activity on the Checking account # *0000 with Guaranty Bank & Trust:

Account Bal is $2,333.53 as of 03/17/2021 01:13 AM”

****************

Ever’month—Right?—No?—You just a One-Trick Pony?

Well, “Go to Fuk You Then!!”—

California! Here I come!”

Vid Share Street Cred: diarci.
Thank You, diarci

******************

FREE BONUS!

It won’t cost One Dime!

(Just Send One Dollar—

Postal Money Order!)

Street Cred: Floyd & And The Gang.

DUH!

(Yeah! I’m Crusin’ For A Brusin’)

*********************

P.S.,

The ABBA Girls Are

JUST TOO HAPPY

In This!

(See above!)

They LOVE Their Work!

And This IS ….

Precisely Why…

I will love them

Until I Die!

THEM!

(Sorry!

Esoteric Sci-Fi, 50’s Movie Ref)

Every Good Boy Deserve A Flavour. (No ‘Flavours’ Given Here.) Just Some Free Advice: “Forced Self-ISOLATION MAY BE MENTALLY UNHEALTHY.” (You’re Welcome.)


Living all alone here at The Lion’s Den for nearly one year now…

I’m starting to feel a lot Like Matt Damon:

**************

Hey! I was told Linda was to meet me HERE!

It’s a relatively small planet.

I shouldn’t be hard to find!

Where The Fuk is SHE?!

************

*****************

RIP Jimi.

Your genius will Never Be Exceeded

Nor Cheapened.

*******

Thank You For Stopping by.

Bye!

“Tennis Anyone?” –Didn’t Think So… Perhaps Dinner & A Movie Then?

A Sumptuous Feast. Fit For Any Beast:

OK: Ready, Set, GO!

(Or is it, “Game. Set. Match?”)

I am easily befuddled…

Got my evening all mapped out:

Dinner and a movie—then perhaps a little ‘hanky-panky.’

Alcohol may come into play!

Char-dun-Yay!

All The Way!

&

Sade. Sade. Sade.

Pronounced

‘Shar-Day!’

How many times must I re-mind?

Sade insisted we invite Tom Over!

“Sure,” I said. “Wanna invite your Mother too?”

My Dreams of Wooing, Wedding, and Bedding

Sade

Became as a Schooner, Sinking Slowly in The West.

(See Below for Some Kris Sailor Fun)

(Sade’s Momma)

Tennis Never Really Was My Game—Just Sayin’

*********

Tom arrived–already Four Sheets into the wind:

Game ON!

Let’s Get this Party Started!

It was at about this time that

MS Muse showed up,

carrying a can of Whoop– Ass.

We all kinda settled down a little at this point….

I un-corked the wine and put in the movie.

***************

Any and all laughs / jokes are on me,

But the Booze Ain’t Free

(Hit The Tip Jar on Your Way Out)

Merci!

(And Cheers!)

********

POST-SCRIPT FOR THIS UN-SCRIPTED POST:

In Case This Minor Detail Escaped Your Comprehension:

I LOVE SADE!!

POST-POST-POST – SCRIPT:

I’m NOT REALLY AN ASSHOLE:

(I just play one on WORD-DEPRESSED)

**********

POST-POST-POST-POST-POST – SCRIPT:

Watching Sade running down the filthy streets of (NYC?)

And past the ship docks…

Reminded me of yet another Strong, Determined, Beautiful

“I Will Not Be Denied”

Woman.

Whom I love, Respect, and Admire:

Barbra!

Best Line From The Song:

“At least I didn’t fake it.”

POST-POST-POST-POST-POST – POST-SCRIPT:

I love My Life.

And All My Ex-‘Wife’s

And All My Ex-Girl-Friends

And all the women I have had the honour to have known.

(Especially The Ones I got to Know in that ‘Biblical Sense’)

The very small and faint link below (Underneath Maddy) works… But WordPress IS STUPID! AND REFUSES TO EVEN ALLOW A THUMB-NAIL!

***************

As Promised Above:

Kris is Mentally Ill–This is why I love His Texican Dumb-Ass.

(Did that sound Gay?

Fuck it!

I don’t care!)

************

One last ‘Fun Fact’

And then I’m Done:

If it had not been for My Second,

Lisa-The-Shakespearean-Marlowe Prof,

(No! Lisa was my ‘Third.’—My Memory is somewhat flawed at times; and math has never been ‘my strong suit’

(I don’t even own a suit)

–Rhonda was ‘My Second’–But who’s counting, right?)

But 3rd time’s Le charme, n’est-ce-pas?

I would never have grown to truly, properly appreciate Sade, if not for ‘Mrs. Marcom The Third.’

Lisa had ALL of her CD/s

And for some many months…

She is all we listened to…

(Over and over, and over—again–she made us Happy)

Coast-to-Coast

***************

OH! Almost Forgot!

Lisa had one More Secret ‘Secret’ To Share

(I was Not Prepared—

for this One!)

She loved Madonna.

Had ALL Her CD’s as well.

Oh well!

Had no choice:

I fell in-love with Madonna too

********

“Happiness lies in your own hands.”

Ponder that.

How I live my life!

Only YOU are responsible for YOUR Own Happiness–

You are sole proprietor, caretaker, keeper of your own happiness.

No one, save you, can ‘make’ you ‘Happy.

It’s all on you.

Nobody else.

******************

“Here’s to My Old Friend,” He said.

“And kissed his ass Goodbye.”

–Kris

Famous Texan

Lance Looks in the Mirror

First time in some years…

(Risky, Dangerous Enterprise? Yes?!)

Casually regards the visage staring back at him.

“Something’s missing,” he says.

Dons DEVO hat.

Yeah!

Hell yeah!

That’s the “Look!”

********

“Maternity Flight Suits????”

Joe? Really?

I never watched the movie, “G.I. Jane”

(Because it was a farce and insulted the Navy SEAL program), but… come on Man!”

“Maternity Flight Suits????”

***********

(Maybe it is time for me to give ‘G.I. Jane’ a second chance. Cannot possibly be worse than the garbage coming down the pike these days.)

*******

I died along the way.

But at least I showed up.

Twice

*************

This post is in desperate need of some

‘Joni’

To talk me down off that ledge

I have found me Precariously placed on…

(or is it ‘upon’?)

Which is the ‘proper’ word?

Ask me how many fucks I give.

I write; therefore I Yam!

Just call me ‘Popeye!’

************

Vid Cred: jmms429

Song credit: Who do you think?

SPAM ALERT! “DANGER WILL ROBINSON!” Posted on FaceFuk Today—Not Sure Why Or a Version of a Perversion

SPAM ALERT! “DANGER WILL ROBINSON!” (Posted on FaceFuk Today—Not Sure Why)

*****

I posted this on 26 January, but I don’t think ‘it took.’ So here it is again.

Yep. SPAM

Recycled

Will Write Some New, Original Shit Real Soon.

Promise.

(Hey! I still have that bridge for sale–20 percent off–Today Only.)

I am rather proud (There is that ‘Vanity’ Thang again—Rearing its ugly head) of me for the construction of this one. But It was sincere and it was ‘heartfelt.’

There is a plethora of Upbeat, Happy, and Positive Stolen Content. —Take a look.

Hook or Crook

Street Cred For Vid: Pharrell Williams

******

My Good Friends, Yes, times are severely Fukked Right Now. We all know this, but, if we lose our optimism, positivity, and hope, and give in to Nattering Nabobs of Negativity, (CNN, I’m staring/glaring at YOU!)

Then We become Part of The Problem, and not The Solution.

Keep the Faith Friends. Stay Positive, Optimistic, and Joyous. Life is a Gift, no Matter The Current State of Fukked-Up we find The Times to be. Things will Get Better. They Always Do. 

(I missed my ‘Calling!’ I should have been a preacher! Joke, By the Way,)

END OF SERMON

(And Don’t Neglect The Tithing Plates — Commentary and Feedback)

Cheers!

****

Credit to Spiro Agnew For The ‘Nattering Nabobs’ quote. I endeavor to always Give Credit Where Credit is due—Speaking of, I have maxed out two of my five credit cards. I may need to win the lottery soon—just to maintain my luxurious, glamorous lifestyle.

And here is The Genesis: (You really did not think Spiro had The Smarts to come up with this on his own, did you?)

“The term was used by William Safire in a speech written for United States Vice President Spiro Agnew in 1970, which received heavy media coverage. Agnew, increasingly identified with his attacks on critics of the Nixon administration, described these opponents as “nattering nabobs of negativism”.

Pandora, The Most Beautiful Girl In The World…


Content cred: Julie Nolke

*Ring Ring*

“Hello? “Is this GOD?” (My Phone Was Glowing–Natural Assumption–I knew instinctively it was not The BatMan. As we have been ‘On The Outs’ Ever Since I accused him of Fucking ‘The Boy Wonder”–Long story)

So, It must be God: He is the only one who ever calls me.

*Pregnant Pause*

So I repeated my question:

“Is this God?”

“Yes it is, My Son.”

“I ain’t your Son. That would be that ‘other’ guy.”

“Oh Sorry, Hey Zeus is the only one who ever calls me. What’s on your mind, My ‘Friend’? Oh wait! I called you. You seem to be stressed out these days.”

“I just have a couple of quick, simple questions.”

“Go on…”

“Why did you create gnats?”

God said, “Ask Pandora.”

So I asked, “What’s up with this WuFlu? This part of your ‘Devine Plan?'”

Then GOD hung up on me.

What an asshole.

****

Much More Julie:

And For reference:

Just for Fun: