I’m So Sorry – Not Sorry Kids, But I Cannot Leave This Alone. It Wounded Me & Hurt My Cold, Cold Heart. Cut Me To The Quick. This Was Meant To Be A Tongue – in- Cheek Fun Post, But Some Asshole Took Offense Becuz I Used The ‘C’ Word–It Was Directed At ME! No One Else But Me! ME FOR FUCK SAKE! If You Be Too Stupid To Understand That Go Find Some Cute Kitten Vids To Explore & Enjoy! Jeeze Louise! Rent a Sense of Humor! “Just a Quick One For Fun (Food Makes Me Throw Up In My Mouth)”

If You Call Yourself A Diva, You’re Probably A

CUNT!

Cred: Sarah Silverman

******

Elton John, Dua Lipa – Cold Heart

(Sorry Hank. Thank You Elton)

Cred: Sir Elton John

****************

Okay Hank:

Devil Deserves His Due:

Cred for Vid: Country At Its Finest

********

Read the comment here if you have no life or a min of time to waste:

barbaramullenix November 15, 2021 at 12:59

“Well, you finally topped yourself. I have some of the ‘thickest’ skin around and you finally pissed me off enough to tell you. I don’t know the sort of women you associate with, but none, to my knowledge, after hearing the work ‘cunt’ would have anything to do with you. I would reconsider your claim to be a ‘functioning’ alcoholic if you deem some of your phrasing to be anything but misogynistic.
Goodbye, and I hope you eventually get your life together.

***

I’m Calling ‘Bullshit’ On Her Comment:

Supercilious Bitch!

******

misogynistic?!

Are You fucking kidding me?!

I am about as far removed from misogyny as one can possibly be!

Read My Fuckin’ Blog!

I do nothing but celebrate & praise women on these pages!

Emmylou Harris on 3/13/77 in Chicago, Il. (Paul Natkin/Image Direct)

Today was a beautiful Texas early-autumn day.

Forever Autumn

Jeff Wayne, Richard Burton, Justin Hayward

This is a Most Beautiful Song

I Had The Entire ‘War of The Worlds’ On Cassette When I was in Sinai

Played it so much I had to buy a new copy

My cassette player ate my first

I threw THAT Cassette Player into a Wadi for The Bedouins and Bought a new, more better, more loyal one!

(Srry; I gots distracted—post is below)

Only a few problems:

I was dangerously low on booze.

(And I HATE DT MAN!)

And it was a Sunday.

And I was drunk

I refuse to drive drunk.

Not because I fear The LAW

But because I don’t wanna harm some innocent.

I went outside and sat down.

The sky was so blue

The air was so clean

I watched three crows on the wing

Diving down ever’ once in a while…

Picking up on shiny things

Joni!

Black Crow

I looked at the morning
After being up all night
I looked at my haggard face in the bathroom light
I looked out the window
And I I saw that ragged soul take flight
I saw a back crow flying
In a blue sky

Had heard Timothy, my neighbor, mucking about.

Figured he could drive me to the beer store soon as they could legally (Crack of Noon in Tejas–Gotta let them Church O’ Christers outta their pen) sell me some wine or beer, or le both.

And some Copenhagen and a bit of food too (While I was at it)

But he was shade-tree mechanic working on someone’s car down the way.

So I just waited and watched the crows

And day-dreamed of booze and food….

*****

To be continued

I Promise

Copenhagen Junkie – Chris LeDoux

Vid Share Street Cred: tjcrnj

Ramen Noodle Song

Vid Cred: Cartoon Connect

****

Had to add

From the Commentary Section:

barbaramullenix to Lance:
“I love me some Ramen Noodles. Cheap too!

****

Lance to barbaramullenix:

Yeah, Ramen Noodles are chock – full of vitamins and minerals & nutrition come to fruition

Vitamin ‘A’ for ‘Asshole, you should not be eating this’
Vitamin ‘C’ for ‘You really are a dumb cunt, ain’t ya?’

Vitamin ‘D’ for “this Dumbass gonna eat this Shit
Mineral ‘S’ for “You’re gonna have a stroke’
Vitamin ‘E’ for ‘Eat me; see what happens to yer body’

Vitamin ‘K’ for You’re not gonna be OK, So’K?”

LOLOLOLOL!

Cheers!

–Lance

This Was Meant To Be A Tongue – in- Cheek Fun Post, But Some Asshole Took Offense Becuz I Used The ‘C’ Word–It Was Directed At ME! No One Else But Me! ME FOR FUCK SAKE! If You Be Too Stupid To Understand That Go Find Some Cute Kitten Vids To Explore & Enjoy! Jeeze Louise! Rent a Sense of Humor! “Just a Quick One For Fun (Food Makes Me Throw Up In My Mouth)”

Read the comment here if you have no life or a min of time to waste:

barbaramullenix November 15, 2021 at 12:59 Edit:

“Well, you finally topped yourself. I have some of the ‘thickest’ skin around and you finally pissed me off enough to tell you. I don’t know the sort of women you associate with, but none, to my knowledge, after hearing the work ‘cunt’ would have anything to do with you. I would reconsider your claim to be a ‘functioning’ alcoholic if you deem some of your phrasing to be anything but misogynistic.
Goodbye, and I hope you eventually get your life together.

***

I’m Calling ‘Bullshit’ On Her Comment:

Supercilious Bitch!

******

misogynistic?!

Are You fucking kidding me?!

I am about as far removed from misogyny as one can possibly be!

Read My Fuckin’ Blog!

I do nothing but celebrate & praise women on these pages!

Emmylou Harris on 3/13/77 in Chicago, Il. (Paul Natkin/Image Direct)

Today was a beautiful Texas early-autumn day.

Forever Autumn

Jeff Wayne, Richard Burton, Justin Hayward

This is a Most Beautiful Song

I Had The Entire ‘War of The Worlds’ On Cassette When I was in Sinai

Played it so much I had to buy a new copy

My cassette player ate my first

I threw THAT Cassette Player into a Wadi for The Bedouins and Bought a new, more better, more loyal one!

(Srry; I gots distracted—post is below)

Only a few problems:

I was dangerously low on booze.

(And I HATE DT MAN!)

And it was a Sunday.

And I was drunk

I refuse to drive drunk.

Not because I fear The LAW

But because I don’t wanna harm some innocent.

I went outside and sat down.

The sky was so blue

The air was so clean

I watched three crows on the wing

Diving down ever’ once in a while…

Picking up on shiny things

Joni!

Black Crow

I looked at the morning
After being up all night
I looked at my haggard face in the bathroom light
I looked out the window
And I I saw that ragged soul take flight
I saw a back crow flying
In a blue sky

Had heard Timothy, my neighbor, mucking about.

Figured he could drive me to the beer store soon as they could legally (Crack of Noon in Tejas–Gotta let them Church O’ Christers outta their pen) sell me some wine or beer, or le both.

And some Copenhagen and a bit of food too (While I was at it)

But he was shade-tree mechanic working on someone’s car down the way.

So I just waited and watched the crows

And day-dreamed of booze and food….

*****

To be continued

I Promise

Copenhagen Junkie – Chris LeDoux

Vid Share Street Cred: tjcrnj

Ramen Noodle Song

Vid Cred: Cartoon Connect

****

Had to add

From the Commentary Section:

barbaramullenix to Lance:
“I love me some Ramen Noodles. Cheap too!

****

Lance to barbaramullenix:

Yeah, Ramen Noodles are chock – full of vitamins and minerals & nutrition come to fruition

Vitamin ‘A’ for ‘Asshole, you should not be eating this’
Vitamin ‘C’ for ‘You really are a dumb cunt, ain’t ya?’

Vitamin ‘D’ for “this Dumbass gonna eat this Shit
Mineral ‘S’ for “You’re gonna have a stroke’
Vitamin ‘E’ for ‘Eat me; see what happens to yer body’

Vitamin ‘K’ for You’re not gonna be OK, So’K?”

LOLOLOLOL!

Cheers!

–Lance

Just a Quick One For Fun (Food Makes Me Throw Up In My Mouth)

Today was a beautiful Texas early-autumn day.

Forever Autumn

Jeff Wayne, Richard Burton, Justin Hayward

This is a Most Beautiful Song

I Had The Entire ‘War of The Worlds’ On Cassette When I was in Sinai

Played it so much I had to buy a new copy

My cassette player ate my first

I threw THAT Cassette Player into a Wadi for The Bedouins and Bought a new, more better, more loyal one!

(Srry; I gots distracted; it happens—post is below)

Only a few problems:

I was dangerously low on booze.

(And I HATE DT MAN!)

And it was a Sunday.

And I was drunk

I refuse to drive drunk.

Not because I fear The LAW

But because I don’t wanna harm some innocent.

I went outside and sat down.

The sky was so blue

The air was so clean

I watched three crows on the wing

Diving down ever’ once in a while…

Picking up on shiny things

Joni!

Black Crow

I looked at the morning
After being up all night
I looked at my haggard face in the bathroom light
I looked out the window
And I I saw that ragged soul take flight
I saw a back crow flying
In a blue sky

Had heard Timothy, my neighbor, mucking about.

Figured he could drive me to the beer store soon as they could legally (Crack of Noon in Tejas–Gotta let them Church O’ Christers outta their pen) sell me some wine or beer, or le both.

And some Copenhagen and a bit of food too (While I was at it)

But he was shade-tree mechanic working on someone’s car down the way.

So I just waited and watched the crows

And day-dreamed of booze and food….

*****

To be continued

I Promise

Copenhagen Junkie – Chris LeDoux

Vid Share Street Cred: tjcrnj

Ramen Noodle Song

Vid Cred: Cartoon Connect

****

Had to add

From the Commentary Section:

barbaramullenix to Lance:
“I love me some Ramen Noodles. Cheap too!

****

Lance to barbaramullenix:

Yeah, Ramen Noodles are chock – full of vitamins and minerals & nutrition come to fruition

Vitamin ‘A’ for ‘Asshole, you should not be eating this’
Vitamin ‘C’ for ‘You really are a dumb cunt, ain’t ya?’

Vitamin ‘D’ for “this Dumbass gonna eat this Shit
Mineral ‘S’ for “You’re gonna have a stroke’
Vitamin ‘E’ for ‘Eat me; see what happens to yer body’

Vitamin ‘K’ for You’re not gonna be OK, So’K?”

LOLOLOLOL!

Cheers!

–Lance

More Random Memories from the Middle East: Still Sinai

Previously: One  Two

***

The IDF soldier navigated down the hill as Janet got ‘properly’ dressed inside our tent to greet our visitor. I didn’t bother. I figured cut-offs and no shirt just fine. As for him, well he had slightly longish unkempt hair, as was the norm for IDF soldiers back then. Most of them were reservists anyhow. IDF was a mega-weekend-warrior class anyhow. His beret was tucked into his shirt at the shoulder. His olive-drab uniform was dusty. In general, the IDF Army was unkempt, un-kept, un-disciplined and Fucking Ferocious.

Perfect soldiers.

This truth never did escape me. Some respect from me was obviously the ‘order of my day’ here…

I watched him cautiously descend onto the  my beach. The night before I had un-cautiously descended and ascended (ten times), full of false courage brought about by some imbibing and dope. But what the hell! So… I studied his unsteady progress toward me.

As he approached he switched to English, “This is restricted zone,” he said as he pointed with his rifle over his shoulder to what looked to be a military base of some minor proportions.

“Well, It was dark when we got here and I didn’t notice,” I lied.

“You must leave. Now.”

“Something wrong?” Janet said, sticking her head out of our tent.

“Janet, I got this. Go back inside,” I almost barked.

“Fine!” she said. “Gin or Whiskey for breakfast?”

“Back inside!”

“Fine!” she huffed and disappeared inside the tent.

Turning my attention back to the IDF soldier, I asked/said, “So ‘we’ (Meaning US, the U.S. of us), can pay for this ‘wonderful’ base here in Sinai, and you come climbing down from ‘Mount Fucking Sinai’ to inform me that I am not welcome here? Is this correct?”

He laughed at that and proceeded to take a seat on a beer cooler next to our now burnt out campfire. At least this one had a sense of humor.

“I am Jacob,” he said. “And who are you my American Friend?”

“Lance,” I said, cautiously  extending my hand, which he took and shook earnestly. “Would you like some breakfast? We have tuna fish, whiskey, or gin. Your choice.”

Again he laughed. “Coffee?”

“Fraid not. Sorry.”

“I noticed you have some ice in your big cooler. Where did you get it?” (How did he know this?)

“Eilat,” I said.

“Do not drink the water from the melted parts then.”

“Why not?”

“Because it is made with ammonia at the factory in Eilat. Toxic. Do not drink the water.”

“Hell! My man! I drink the water in Cairo.”

“Your funeral then.”

We laughed some more. I was warming up to this guy.

“Seriously though my friend, you cannot remain here.”

“Yeah? Well, we were planning to push south today anyhow. South to Ras Mohammed.”

“Beautiful diving and snorkeling there. Mind the sharks though.”

“The ‘Sharks’ are why we are going.”

“All you Americans… are Cowboys?” he snorted.

“Yep.”

“Okay then. Bonne chance! I take my leave now. Be sure you take yours too. Soon. Shalom.”

“Cheers, and nice to meet you Jacob.”

“Bye,” he said and walked away.

***

“Well, you fucked that up,” Janet said, finally emerging from the tent.

“How so?”

“Now we have to leave this place.”

“Janet, I never intended to stay here more than the one night. I wanna get to Ras.”

“I like it here.”

“Pack your shit. We’re leaving now.”

She ‘packed her shit’ and I schlepped it and the rest up the cliff and loaded our little chariot. Within two hours we were back on the road again, heading south. As we were driving through the Sinai with the mountains on our right, she pulled out her Bible and instructed  invited  demanded of me to ‘turn off that damn noise.’ That ‘noise’ was Bob Marley and I hesitated… for a moment, then saw some seriousness in her brown eyes and acquiesced. She opened her ‘book’ and began to read from Genesis.  I must admit it was fitting, given the time and the place.

We spent some miles in this activity. I smoked some cigarettes and studied the landscape. The Sinai Desert along the coast of the Gulf of Aqaba is wondrous beautiful. As I said, the contrast moved me. Janet’s reading (which she did quite well, I may add) added to the ambiance. This girl had some talents. “In the beginning…”

But, the magic moments could not last (Janet and I had a propensity for combat). We eventually got into an argument about thirty clicks outside of Sharm el Sheik. I was slightly gin-buzzed by this point and in no mood for…

“Stop the fuckin’ car!” She shouted.

“Whaaa?”

“Stop the FUCKING CAR!”

“Shit! What for?!”

“I’m getting out! That is what FOR!”

“Janet, we’re in the middle of a fucking desert in a Muslim / Bedouin country. Are you sure?”

“Yes! Goddamn it! I am sure. Stop the fucking car. I hate you!” (Not entirely sure where this sentiment came from, but it was, I could see, sincere.)

“Fine!” I stopped the car. “Don’t forget your fuckin’ Virginia Slims,” I said as she opened the door, got out and proceeded to ‘march’ down the empty road.

I would have (should have) left her there, but y’all know I could not.

 More to come… Here

Video Credit:

TheCowboy4411