Robin Williams!

Robin Williams!
New shit: “Nobody knows the Trouble I’ve Seen.” (And administered)
Fuk it!
(I’ll edit it later)
Goddamn it!
Git off my back!
Author’s Note (at the beginning… Yes. Yes. Fucking YES!! I know! Not Great Form!)
Fuck it!
Author’s Note:
Recent Au Courant events (Afghanistan) are bumming me out.
Charlie Wilson: “These things happened. They were glorious and they changed the world… and then we fucked up the endgame.”
Nuff said?
“Yes Lance. Now STFU and write.”
“Okay.”
Okay, but…
One last ed. note:
This lame-ass post has a lot (even by my sub-standard standards)
A lot of attached… Lancelot Links and Vids.
It is highly (and drunkenly) recommended you ‘experience them all’ to get the
‘Full Benefit’
Jes sayin…
***
Now I know.
Now I know why
Now I know all the reasons whey–why
(“Lance! There is ALWAYS a Fucking Song! Ain’t they?!)
(Fuck off! Voice in my head)
And fuck you too Muse!
Run tell all that!
****
Now I know why I get drunk
Now I know why I used to stay drunk
Now I know why it is a good thing
And good for one
To stay drunk
Simple logistics and meta-physics:
To avoid the hangovers!
“The hairs of some dogs”
As it were
The hair of Man’s Best Friend!
For lack of a reason
Hairs of dogs are in season
***
Time of The Reason-Season
“What’s your name? Who’s Your Bag-Daddy??”
“Me! C’est Moi!”
(Asshole!)
Who’s Your Daddy?
Street Cred for Vid: andrew91118
Tis reason enuff.
To dip snuff.
(And I love dogs)
Amen
P.S. This is a ‘temporary’ affliction. It too shall pass.
“How do you know this Doctor Marcom?”
“Because I have been to Drunken Med School Grasshopper.”
This Computer Has Been Drinking (Not Me)
Street Cred for Vid: MasterBiblicalMemory
***
“But, Dr. Marcom, none shall pass. Pass out perhaps, but ‘pass’? Naw.”
None shall pass thru this life unscathed.
“Oye vay of little faith!”
“Dr. Marcom, you are stupid.”
*heavy sigh*
“Some people, you just cannot reach.”
What we have here…
Communication
***
Cynthia-The-Housekeeper and my Only BFF here in Commerce Amerika…
She.
She is ‘on to’ me.
She knows me.
She came to my door.
Asked me if I wanted to strip my bed.
Freudian Slip?
(Tuesdays here at Lion’s Lair are ‘Strip Yer Bed-Sheets Day)
I replied,
“No Ma’am; I’m good, but thanks for askin'”
She gave me that ‘Black-Woman-All-Knowing-Look’
That ‘Look’
That look that telegraphs.
Telegraphs “I know you’ve been drinking again”
My Tell-All, End All Tell.
Tis a curse!
I have no skill at poker.
Nor do I possess a poker-face.
My Cynthia asked over those “I already know the answer” eyes:
“You Okay?”
“Yep. I’m okay,” I lied.
“I’m watching you,” she said.
“I know you are Honey, and thank you for that,”
I replied.
As she walked away, I said to her moving away from me back,
“I love you.”
She said over her shoulder,
“I love you more. Catch ya later Alligator!”
(Her favorite catch-all, end-all phrase. I never ask why. Why she likes it. She just likes it. And that is reason enough for me. Because I am in love with her. Love is just that way Y’all. It works in those mysterious ways. Kinda like the Invisible Spaghetti-Man-in-the-sky. Man. Oh man!)
As soon as I shut the door I heard my Motorola Phone speaking to me:
“Hello Moto!”
(Note to self: ‘Change name to ‘Moto.’)
“Fuck you Moto!” I said.
Then I did something very very uncharacteristic:
I answered the damn phone.
“Hello?”
“Is this Rance Marcom?’ (Heavy Indian accent)
“No.”
“I need to speak Rance. Is he there?”
“Are you from India Mister Moto?”
“I from Capitol One.”
“No. I think you’re from India.”
“Mister Rance Marcom?”
“English ain’t yer first language is it? I just told you, ‘Mistah Rance’ ain’t here.”
“I need speak to Mister Rance Marcom.”
“Sorry to say, he is in Kabul at this moment getting his ass shot at.”
Mister Moto / Capitol One hung up on me.
Cannot imagine why.
***
In closing
In trying to put a fine point on the point that is This Pointless Post:
I love booze.
I love what it does to me.
I love what it doesn’t me.
I love it when it does not kill me.
(Apocryphal: ‘Write Drunk. Edit Sober)
I love it.
(Did I say this already?)
Don’t cry for me Miss Dementia
I’ll be fine.
***
The (Still) Living
END
*static on radio*
“Houston. We have a problem…”
TBC…
j’espere
(Dat’s France-ish for ‘j’espere’. Google it! Yu lazy-fair mo-fo’s)
***
In closing
In trying to put a fine point on the point that is This Pointless Post:
I love booze.
I love what it does me.
I love what it doesn’t me.
I love it when it does not kill me.
(Apocryphal: ‘Write Drunk. Edit Sober)
I love it.
(Did I say this already?)
Don’t cry for me Miss Dementia
“Objection Your Honor! The Witless Witness is Inebriated!”
“Sustained. Mister Moto, continue, but sobriety is the soul of wit. Please take some effort to remember that.”
“Yer honor…”
“Boom! Thirty Years! No Beers!”
It was at this point, Yoda spoke to me:
“Fucked you are.”
“Thanks for that Yoda.”
I NEVER Go Out On New Years Eve.
Why? One might ask.
I refuse to drink with amateurs.
That’s why.
***
I’m just a-sittin’ here, tryin’ to get drunker ‘n’ Cooter Brown.
And BTW, Who The Fu*k is ‘Cooter Brown’?
Found Him!
Bears a Striking Resemblance to Your
Humble Raconteur
(Ain’t He Precious & Cute & Cuddly?)
HaHaHa!
****
I LOVE NYC (or at least my fantasy nostalgic version of it from The Forties)
For Lance, The New Year Only Begins when New York City drops that Big Ball in Times’ Square.
This year they ‘Dropped the Proverbial Ball.”
(Or did drop the Actual Beautiful Big Shiny Ball–I honestly don’t know–Because–CNN)
And chose to broadcast fucking car commercials instead.
Fu*k you NYC! I am finally so OVER You!
(I am gonna remain in Texas.)
IF they did actually literally drop the Big Ball, fuck you CNN because you did NOT SHOW it.
Fucked up my New Years’ EVE Experience
Fu*k you CNN!
(If anyone can find a video of the Ball Drop from tonight, 2020, if there actually is one, please send it to me—I wanna see it)
I am so pissed that I don’t even wanna watch Lame-Ass Don Lemon get drunk.
(What a Fuckkking IDIOT Moron HE is, but THAT IS A DIFFERENT POST)
From a recent Facefuk Post of Mine:
“I CANNOT wait to watch DON LEMON make a complete and absolute ass/fool of himself tonight.
He never fails to ‘deliver.’ And make me LMFAO!
(Watching CNN ‘do’ NEW YEARS EVE has become a Lance Marcom ‘Family Tradition.’)”
Fu*k it!
The Magic is GONE!
Not a propitious beginning for 21!
I fear we are gonna be more properly FU*KED than we already are….
We got No Karma to cash in.
The below is a powerfully, passionate, Magical rendition of one of my all-time favorite songs.
Way to Go Liza!
“Liza with A ‘Z’”
(Only ‘true’ Liza Fans will Catch the reference)
Bravo!
I have always loved you ‘Lisa’…
Opps! Sorry! Oh of course, only real Liza fans will get the joke.
(But of course, you already know that)
OK. Just gonna throw this in for reference (This post is all over the place. Unlikely I will ever ‘come back’ and clean it up)
Anyway… more on Liza:
“Liza with a ‘Z’. Not ‘Lisa’ with an ‘S’”
–Liza
(Old album of hers that I wore out listening to over and over and over and over again.)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hWURas7fYwk
I love you Liza!
This Rare Time, The ‘Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Sciences’
Got it Right:
Life is a Fucking Cabaret.
Try Living it!
*******
Oh! And lest I forget to drop this in:
I also laugh my ass off watching these Bobbsey Twin Idiots:
Andy Cohen and Anderson Cooper
CNN, You are a FU*KING JOKE!
I don’t want to be unkind, but these two assholes wear me out with their fake, forced banter.
FUCK YOU CNN!
I drop in something more “Happy” and “Upbeat” Below
FUCK TWENTY-TWENTY VISION!
(I have reading glasses–I can see the truth)
FUCK 2020!
(And YOUR lack of Compassion for Humanity)
“Hey Twenty-Twenty One!
Don’t make me angry.
You won’t like me when I’m angry.”
(Just trust me on this and keep your mouth shut and your ears open)
And of course, I am the quintessential ‘Dancing Clown’
(This should go without saying)
There has never been, nor never will be, a woman in ‘my life’–virtual or otherwise–that I will love more than Joni.
And if you have ‘groan-tired’ of me bangin’ on about (Joan) Joni you are visiting the wrong blog. Go Away!
“Cherchez la femme
Whenever love comes around
Someone’s a dancin’ clown
Cherchez la femme
Whenever hearts start to pound
Someone’s a dancin’ clown”
C’est moi Joni.
C’est Moi!
A Dancing clown.
C’est Moi!
Most diseases have some chance for a cure.
There is NO Cure for Alcoholism.
None
Nada
It is just something one has to come to terms with.
Trust me Kids:
I have been battling with her ever since I was thirteen years old.
But I’m still standing!
And fighting the good fight!
Still Standin’!
The Piano Computer Has Been Drinking
Cred: MasterBiblicalMemory
*****
If I try to cast her out…
Well, this outcome is
WAY
Worse
It takes a long time to drink yourself to death.
The DT’s can kill you in a week, or even less.
Depending on the weather
“I came here to drink myself to death”
I am so much in love with Carly And Carla
Carla, I Have been in love with you for all of my adult life
Jimmy Buffett – I Wish Lunch Could Last Forever–
The Place with No Clock”
Crosby, Stills, Nash –
No Young Yet!
Helplessly Hoping
I need To take/make a piss! a piss~Now, Don’t Miss!
I am so much in love with Carly And Carla
Carla, I Have been in love with you for all of my adult life
Jimmy Buffett – I Wish Lunch Could Last Forever–
The Place with No Clock”
Crosby, Stills, Nash –
No Young Yet!
Helplessly Hoping
I need To take/make a piss! a piss~Don’t Miss!