How did we ever become the Champion of the Free World?

The Bastion of Capitalism?

The Shining City on a Hill?

The Cradle of Modern Western Civilization?

Yeah Kids, Duck and Cover (and while you’re down there, kiss your ass goodbye.)

OK. I suppose it was ‘The Age of Innocence’ (Or maybe the ‘Age of Stupid People’)

I did those duck and cover drills just like everyone else.