Please Do NOT Look At This. Let Alone READ It. TRIGGER WARNING!

This Post is Obnoxious & Insulting, But It Accurately Depicts My Mood At The Time I Wrote it.

***

I NEVER Lie to Y’all. And I NEVER ‘Sugar-Coat’ Nothin’.

Updated! Had to Add Some Linda at The End–Cannot Believe I Forgot!

This Post is all Fucked UP.

Guess What? I No Longer Dare to CArE! Don’t GIvE A sHiT! fUcK IT!

“Hearts are like AssHoles; eVer’one gOts one!”

Oh My God!

I Can’t Believe It’s Happening

(To Me)

Again.

And Yes,

I Was Just Re-Leashed From Hospital

Yesterday Noon

Had to pay some Kid Twenty Quid Just to Drive Me Home

(‘Bout half-a-mile)

And No,

I Could NOT ‘Walk It”

For You See:

My Legs Had Stopped Working

For Some Bizarre Reason

***

Wasted Time

I Honestly Don’t Know Why I Waste My Finite Time.

I Pull Together All Kinds of Poignant Videos.

No One Watches.

God Forbid Someone Comments!

Takes Some Time

Drops a Thin Dime

Says

“Thank You! You Made Me Laugh!”

Oh Hell NO!

Cannot Be Bothered To Spend A Fuckin’ Mouse Clik!

Fuck All Y’all!

And I Do Sincerely Mean That!

Vid Share Cred: Chris Spags

Content Creator: K Ryan Jones (I think)

And of Course The Mesmerizin’

Connie Britton

***

George Don’t Give A Shit

He is My Spirit Animal

George Ref’ d The Magic Words!

He SAID

“Bobby Darin”

“Mack the Knife”

Anyone who reads me, knows most of my shit is bullshit about women! is about women–my relationships with women. I love women. This is well-documented.

I have broken lots of hearts.

I Regret That Now

I am Truly Sorry

Lots of good woman hearts.

My heart, my one one, my only one, has been broken too.

I should take better care of it.

Try to Look out for it.

More.

More earnestly.

More diligently.

Less carelessly.

Heart Broke.

More times than I wish to recount.

But.

I always manage

to sailor on.

And I will.

Continue.

For

Ever.

This is cruel.

And

BRILLIANT

Billie Holiday

A National Treasure

Tragic Ophilia

Cred for Vid: jakuerika

Billie H is the broad singing; but you knew that already….

*********

And crude.

But it is how I choose to survive.

I honestly have no choice in the matter.

Yeah! I’m An Asshole!

Streetcar My Desire

*********

If you do not get my sense of humor, you are in the wrong place.

And you need to leave.

Now.

Right Now.

Right Fuckin’ Now

And In Haste

Hasta La Vista!

Lo Siento Mi Vida

Linda!

In My Humble Opinion, This is One Of The Most Beautiful, Wonderful Songs Ever Performed and Performed By The Most Beautiful, Talented Woman in the World

(Sorry Joni–Forgive me later–I’ll buy you lunch–I Promise.)

Sorry Kids, But I Had to Re-Post This. It Has ‘Almost’ All Of My Favorite Women, Self-Contained Within. “Lo Siento Mi Vida.”

I Am Gonna Take A Wild Guess Here,

But I Miss Having a Good-Hearted Woman

In-My-Life

Cred. Who The Hell D’ya Think?

*****

“TRIGGER WARNING!

This Post is Obnoxious & Insulting,

But It Accurately Depicts My Frame of Reference

At The Time I Wrote it.

I NEVER Lie to Y’all. –Updated! Had to Add Some Linda at The End–Cannot Believe I Forgot! This Post is all Fucked UP. Guess What? I No Longer Dare to CArE! Don’t GIvE A sHiT! fUcK IT! “Hearts are like AssHoles; eVer’one gOts one!”

Wasted Time

I Honestly Don’t Know Why I Waste My Finite Time. I Pull Together All Kinds of Poignant Videos. No One Watches.

God Forbid Someone Comments!

Takes Some Time

Drops a Thin Dime

Says

“Thank You! You Made Me Laugh!”

Oh Hell NO! Cannot Be Bothered To Spend A Fuckin’ Mouse Clik!

Fuck All Y’all!

And I Sincerely Mean That!

“All The Y’alls, Y’all”

Vid Share Cred: Chris Spags

Content Creator: K Ryan Jones (I think)

And of Course The Mesmerizin’

Connie Britton

George Don’t Give A Shit

He is My Spirit Animal

George Ref’ d The Magic Words!

He SAID

“Bobby Darin”

“Mack the Knife”

Anyone who reads me, knows most of my shit is bullshit about women! is about women–my relationships with women. I love women. This is well-documented.

I have broken lots of hearts.

Lots of good woman hearts.

My heart, my one one, my only one, has been broken too.

I should take better care of it.

Try to Look out for it.

More.

More earnestly.

More diligently.

Less carelessly.

In Short: I am a Slut

But Only a Slut For Linda

“Heart Like A Wheel”

Heart Broke.

More times than I wish to recount.

But.

I always manage

to sailor on.

And I will.

Continue.

For

Ever.

This is cruel.

And

BRILLIANT

Billie Holiday

A National Treasure

Tragic Ophilia

Cred for Vid: jakuerika

Billie H is the broad singing; but you knew that already….

*********

And crude.

But it is how I choose to survive.

I “Honestly” have no choice in the matter.

Yeah! I’m An Asshole!

Streetcar My Desire

*********

If you do not get my sense of humor, you are in the wrong place.

And you need to leave.

Now.

Right Now.

Right Fuckin’ Now

And In Haste

Hasta La Vista!

Lo Siento Mi Vida

Linda!

In My Humble Opinion, This is One Of The Most Beautiful, Wonderful Songs Ever Performed and Performed By The Most Beautiful, Talented Woman in the World

(Sorry Joni–Forgive me later–I’ll buy you lunch–I Promise.)

I need…. Never F&cking Look down! You May Drown

Lo Siento Mi Vida

Some Self-Sorrow Bull-Shite

I’m Sorry For My Life

And All My Ex-Wifes

This Post is Bull-Shite

But It Accurately Depicts My Mood At The Time I Wrote it. I NEVER Lie to Y’all. –Updated! Had to Add Some Linda at The End–

Cannot Believe I Forgot! This Post is all Fucked UP. Guess What? I No Longer Dare to CArE!

Don’t GIvE A sHiT! fUcK IT! “Hearts are like AssHoles; eVer’one gOts one!”

Wasted Time

I Honestly Don’t Know Why I Waste My Finite Time. I Pull Together All Kinds of Poignant Videos. No One Watches.

God Forbid Someone Comments!

Takes Some Time

Drops a Thin Dime

Says

“Thank You! You Made Me Laugh!”

Oh Hell NO! Cannot Be Bothered To Spend A F^ckin’ Mouse Clik!

Vid Share Cred: Chris Spags

Content Creator: K Ryan Jones (I think)

And of Course The Mesmerizin’

Connie Britton

George Don’t Give A Shit

He is My Spirit Animal

it’s Important in life to not give a shit”

George Ref’ d The Magic Words!

He SAID

“Bobby Darin”

“Mack the Knife”

Anyone who reads me, knows most of my shit is bullshit about women! is about women–my relationships with women. I love women. This is well-documented.

I have broken lots of hearts.

Lots of good woman hearts.

My heart, my one one, my only one, has been broken too.

I should take better care of it.

Try to Look out for it.

More.

More earnestly.

More diligently.

Less carelessly.

Heart Broke.

More times than I wish to recount.

But.

I always manage

to sailor on.

And I will.

Continue.

For

Ever.

This is cruel.

And

BRILLIANT

Billie Holiday

A National Treasure

Tragic Ophilia

Cred for Vid: jakuerika

Billie H is the broad singing; but you knew that already….

*********

And crude.

But it is how I choose to survive.

I honestly have no choice in the matter.

Yeah! I’m An Asshole!

Streetcar My Desire

*********

If you do not get my sense of humor, you are in the wrong place.

And you need to leave.

Now.

Right Now.

Right Fuckin’ Now

And In Haste

Hasta La Vista!

Lo Siento Mi Vida

Linda!

In My Humble Opinion, This is One Of The Most Beautiful, Wonderful Songs Ever Performed and Performed By The Most Beautiful, Talented Woman in the World

(Sorry Joni–Forgive me later–I’ll buy you lunch–I Promise.)

The Idiot And The Odyssey Take One And Take Duh. There Will Be A Part Three. There Will NOT Be A Part Four Because I’ll Be Dead’r ‘N’ Disco Before That Ever Happens

Before We Begin, I Simply MUST Kick This Off With My Newest Favorite Song, Just to ‘Set’ The Tone:

I Havta Write What I Know.

I Know Women

I Know Booze

And Not Much Else

So There Ya Go and Therefore Here We Are

***

Midland, “Drinkin’ Problem”

“They Call It A Problem; I Call It A Solution”

I Have Melded Two Posts Into One–One Old, One New. I Do This For Continuity And History. Don’t Want Y’all Gettin’ Lost In The Weed Garden That Is My Life

Over the past three or four weeks or so I have been to the Commerce Hospital ER no less than five or eight times.

The Greenville Hospital at Least Three Times

But who’s keeping score right?

I am, that’s who.

I need the ‘Frequent Flyer Miles’

I am goin’ for the record. I think I am there now, or at least real fuckin’ close.

Not proud of it.

Damn sure ain’t ashamed of it.

I have also been to “Glen Oaks Dry-Out Emporium” at least four or five times.

Nice folks, and I ALWAYS meet the most interesting ‘fellow brokens’ while ‘stationed’ there.

And a few of the female staff wanna adopt me.

Bless their hearts.

Reminds me of a song,

And be very Careful what you wish for Ladies

Anyhow, my last ‘Institutionalized’ experience afforded me two days and nights in the Luxurious Commerce City Jail.

Strictly my choice, believe it or don’t, but in truth. I volunteered.

I’ll explain in the my next installment

And, Yes!

“I’ve Got The Answers, Because I’m G’Damn

Bona-Fide!”

My computer is acting really stupid, so I am forced to cut this short for now.

I shall continue, after I take a ball-peen hammer to my comp.

See Y’all in a few.

Stay Safe.

And Stay Far Away From The Commerce City Jail

If You Are Able

P.S., If Y’all are new here, or have not been paying attention, all of these ‘experiences’ were fueled by alcohol, but most of you already know this. Not tryin’ to insult your intelligence, nor disparage your knowledge

*****

Part The First

I realize I have been remiss of late—Not PostingSorry ‘Bout That.

I was over-taken by Events

Perhaps if you read this you will understand and grant me a ‘Pass’.

Or Not

Desperado- Linda Ronstadt and the Eagles

“Your Prison is Walkin’

Thru This World all Alone.”

Yes! My Life Has A Fukkin’ Soundtrack.

And Linda Has A Flat-Ass–I Love Her Anyway!

For you see:

“I have of late—but wherefore
I know not—lost all my mirth, forgone all custom of
exercises; and indeed it goes so heavily with my
disposition that this goodly frame, the earth, seems to
me a sterile promontory, this most excellent canopy,
the air, look you, this brave o’erhanging firmament,
this majestical roof fretted with golden fire, why,
it appears no other thing to me than a foul and pestilent
congregation of vapors. What a piece of work is a man!”

But Tread Soft With My Heart.

You Will Not Like Me If You Anger Me

I Will NOT Be ‘Played’

The Forever

Hopeless Romantic

&

Dyed in the Wool

‘Cock-Eyed Optimist

C’est Moi!

Ed. Note:

This may be somewhat convoluted, as my memories are often clouded by my booze experiences. I will endeavor to give the best true accounting as I honestly try to remember the events which landed me here, 07JUL2022

“Bad Liver and a Broken Heart”

–Tom Waits For No Man

Midland – Drinkin’ Problem

Brilliant!

****

About a month and a half ago I tried to quit drinking.

Guess what happened?

Went to the Commerce Hospital ER No Less than 3 or 4 times.

Discharged from Hospital last time and was informed I was being evicted from my domicile of two years.

“Too Much Drama” was the reason I was given.

Made sense to me—could not argue her point.

She gave me 24 hours to vacate the premises.

That was NOT gonna work for me so I begged an ‘extension’ of three days. She Granted. (‘Bless her heart’)

Meantime, I called the Commerce Police and asked if they could give me a ride to Glen Oaks ‘Dry-Out/Looney Tunes’ Hospital in Greenville—‘Bout fifteen miles away.

“Sure, We aim to serve and protect.”
“Great! Come get me. I’ll be here on the floor and the door is unlocked.”

Civil Servant Cop came and got me, assisted me to my passenger seat and then dropped me at ‘Glen Oaks Hospital for the Broken’

Since I am a veteran,

They required no money from me—May God Forever Bless them.

I spent about nine days at Glen Oaks—Met some other wonderful ‘Broken’ Souls—There were loving connections Made. I enjoyed the camaraderie.

Eventually, one of the staff, a pimply-faced not much more than a kid, drove me back to my ‘home’ which was no longer my home…

I proceeded to load some of my shit into my Ford LaBomba Explorer.

My erstwhile lover/best friend in my universe had made arrangements for me to stay at the Magnuson Hotel until I could find an apartment—a very cheap apartment.

Finally managed to do that.

Then things got weird.

To Be continued.

Very soon–today, in fact.

Believe That? Wanna Buy a Bridge?

Stay Tuned

For Some Bizarre Reason This Moldy Old Post Gets ‘Hits’ Everyday. I Have No Clue as to Why. Surely I Have “Written” Better Shit. Which Goes Mostly Un-Noticed & Ignored

–Save For A Few ‘Die-Hard Fans’–(Thank Y’all Die-Hard Fans) But Alas. Woe Is Me. I’d Like to Reach A Larger Audience.

(This is Mainly Just A ‘Puff-Piece’–Constructed of Stuff I Callously/Un-Abashedly/Shamelessly Stole Off the Internet)

***

Whatever–I Do Not Look Gift Horses in Their Mouths.

“Christopher Hitchens: On The Suicide of His Mother”

Yeah. That’s The Title Of this Shit-Post

***

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern:

This seems to be popular.

Of late.

fuk it.

Perhaps it is just the sign of the seasons….

“What’s Your Name?

Who’s Your Daddy?

Is He Rich Like Me?”

People Seemed to Have More fun In the Sixties.

But isn’t that Always the Way It Is?

We Always hearken to Our Past.

Why?

Our Future Is Right Now–

Meow

Cred: Some Walking Dead Zombies

***

Maybe we all want to commit suicide.

I have Pondered it Too Many Times

(But I Am A Coward)

Yet…Relinquish the world back to the roaches.

Surely they could do no worse, management – wise.

“To Die–Sleep No More”

The below is transcribed from Hitch’s book “Hitch-22”

Hitch 22 cigs

***

…because most of what I know about manic depression I first learned from Hamlet.

“I have of late,” the Prince of Denmark tells us, “but wherefore I know not—lost all my mirth.” Everyone living has occasionally experienced that feeling, but the lines that accompany it are the best definition of the blues that was ever set down.

(“Tired of living, scared of dying” is the next-best encapsulation, offered in “Old Man River.”) Who would carry on with the unending tedium and potential misery if they did not think that extinction would even be less desirable or—as it is phrased in another of Hamlet’s mood-swing soliloquies—if “the ever-lasting” had “not set his canon ‘gainst self-slaughter”?

There are fourteen suicides in eight works of Shakespeare, according to Giles Romilly Feddnen’s study of the question, and these include the deliberate and ostensibly noble ones of Romeo and Juliet and of Othello.

It’s of interest that only Hamlet’s darling Ophelia, whose death at her own hands is not strictly intentional, it is the object of condemnation by the clergy. My own indifference to religion and refusal to credit any babble about an afterlife has, alas, denied me the hearty satisfaction experienced by Ophelia’s brother Laertes, who whirls on the moralizing cleric to say:

“I tell thee, churlish priest,

A ministering angel shall my sister be,

When thou liest howling.”

Memorable to be sure, but too dependent on the evil and stupidity of the heaven/hell dualism, and of scant use to me in deciding how it was that a thoughtful, loving, cheerful, person like Yvonne, who was in reasonable health, would want to simply give up.

I thought it might have something to do with what the specialists call “anhedonia,” or the sudden inability to derive pleasure from anything, most especially from the pleasurable. Al Alverez, in his very testing and demanding study of the subject, “The Savage God,” returns often to the suicide of Cesare Pavese, who took his own life at the apparent height of his powers.  

Don't stay here

“In the year before he died he turned out two of his best novels… One month before the end he received the Strega Prize, the supreme accolade for an Italian writer. ‘I have never been so much alive as now,’ he wrote, ‘never so young.’

A few days later he was dead. Perhaps the sweetness itself of his creative powers made his innate depression all the harder to bear.”

***

Thank you for reading.

-Lance

(We now return you to our regularly scheduled…)

For Reference:

I love Helena Bonham Carter… Cannot help myself. (This scene is disturbing: do Not Watch)

If You Watch Nothing Else, Please Please PLEASE  Watch This:

Credit: And watch it AGAIN!

Here now (I hope) is the proper credit:

https://www.youtube.com/user/jakuerika

Cred: jakuerika

OK: One Last Expanded “Moldie Oldie” (For Today) I AM WORKING ON A BRAND-NEW Post–Look For It Later “What a Piece of Work Is A Man.”

Hamlet (Shakespeare) – Thug Notes Summary and Analysis

(I LOVE This dude!–Must Watch)

Scrambling to post…

(Don’t worry: I really don’t mean a word of it)

Yet:

Here are two of my ‘Favourite’ Things.

(Okay: Three, or Four, or even more)

“I have of late, though wherefore I know not, lost all my mirth.”

Must See (related here) Oui, C’est la vie

I just threw this in to see if y’all were paying attention

This concludes today’s history lesson.

And yes: these will be on the test.

Cheers,

Lance

And of course there is this:

Your Humble Servant: Capt. Von Trapp, circa, 1975

Your Humble Servant: Capt. Von Trapp, circa, 1975

And This:

If there is a greater actor than Derek Jacobi, I’d like to meet him / her.