God Willing & The Creek Don’t Rise–This Will Be Mercifully Brief. And I Won’t Descend Into Some Over-Blown Verbose Bull-Shite American Graffiti

Hey!

I ‘Invented’ A New ‘Holiday!’–

It’s Called

“Reader Appreciation Day”

Hooray!

***

“Thanks, Thanks, And Ever Thanks”

****

Dido – “Thank You”

***

I Just Want To Say:

I Appreciate All Of My Readers

(All Three Of You)

Thank Y’all For Your Visits.

I Am Sincere In This Sentiment

Look Look LOOK! Look At What My Angel, My LaTrish, Brought To Me This Morning (Wheel’d About in a Stolen Walmart Shopping Cart! Good Gawd! How I Love This Woman!–We Think On The Same Same Wave-Link)

Food!

“But Why?”

I Always ask her when she throws something nice at me

Always get the same respond:

“Because You’re a Good Man Lance.”

How do she think she know? I’m an asshole.

Why has she ‘blessed’ me? I am an atheist–She knows this.

***

This time I did not ask. I just said,

“Thank you”

And then I kissed her cheek,

Threw my arms around her and embraced her deep.

Whispered in Her Ear,

“I love You Dear.”

***

“Food! Glorious Food!”

“Angel of the Morning”

Juice Newton

With her Extensions

So ‘Eighties’–Lovin’ It! 

Why is LaTrish so good to me?

I Have No Words.

They Get Stuck in My Throat,

But My Heart Is Bursting

I am not worthy of such acts of human kindness

****

Glorious Food!

I Must Re-Post This Because It Makes Me sad & And I Love My Pity-Parties. “Cowards die many times before their deaths; The valiant never taste of death but once.”–W. Shakespeare (this is really long–please try to slog thru it)

In 1971 when my step-sister Madelyn and I were fourteen and thirteen respectively, my parents would often go out of town on the weekends. My father and stepmother seemed to always have some magic convention or gathering to attend in Dallas, Houston, Kansas City, or any number of other venues.

My father knew all the local high school kids from his directing of the senior plays every year. Two of the former graduates, Ronnie and Doug, then about twenty years old, remained very good friends of my father and particularly Ronnie, (who was Peanut’s Uncle). My father decided that Madelyn and I needed a ‘baby-sitter’ while he and Gloria were off on their long weekends, so they paid Doug and Ronnie to look after us.

Now mind you, Madelyn and I were both pretty certain we were over-mature for our age and could easily fend for ourselves, but we loved having two “big brothers” to help us throw the greatest parties in the history of Honey Grove while under their tutelage.

We used Marcom Manor as our venue of course and were always in a rush to get the house back into some semblance of order before the folks returned, usually on a Sunday, but occasionally on a Monday or Tuesday.

During Labor Day Weekend of 1971 my parents were off to a big convention in Houston and we had a great party planned for Sunday the Fifth of September. We were to have ‘The Mother of All Parties’ out at Lake Coffeemill, north of Honey Grove. (The party was going to serve double duty for me, as my fourteenth birthday was just five days away.)  Right up until the night before, I had no date lined up for this all-day Blow-Out, and I was in a panic.

Continue reading

Well, I just got back from New York city; Kris and Rita done it all

“Rita Coolidge, Rita Coolidge cleft for me”

ritacoolidgeandkrisk.jpg

–Willie Nelson

Since it is still Texas Independence Day, I am gonna continue to bombast my Blog with Texans I admire.

Here is (in my mind) one of the greatest (and most misunderstood and underrated) Texans: Kris Kristofferson, Rhode’s Scholar, ruffian, redneck, poet.

He married well. Too bad it didn’t take. Rita Coolidge! He should have found a way to make that work…

To Be So Smart, Kris, You Were An Idiot!

(I Can Relate!)

Here Is Something Dedicated To All the Cunts I Am Trying So Hard To Love. And Failing! (But I Will NEVER Give UP! I Will Continue To Sailor On! This Is Just HOW I ROLL!)

Y’all,

I spend a lot of time and energy trying to read, comment and appreciate (and even email) a lot of bloggers.

Yes!

All female!

How I roll–

Men–do your own thing!

Find your own Private Idaho’

Stay out of My Lane!

Make Your Own Kind of Music.

Good on you, if you do, but you bore me.

Women Fucking Fascinate me.

You Don’t

Get Over It!

But I try to do my part

My part to do my part to support them

To encourage them,

When they just ignore me.

Well….

Fuck them!

This is a song dedicated to them!

The ones who ignore me!

(GODDAMN! HOW I LOVE YOU SARA S!)

WORDS FAIL ME

AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE IN

THE FUCKING

‘WORDS-BUSINESS!’

******************

My Favorite CUNT!

cASS eLLIOt!

Yeah! I’d Fuck Her!

Thrice!

And We’d Both Enjoy

The

Experience(S)

For Any Asshole I may Have Offended….

I just say this:

“I Told You When I Met You I was Crazy!”

Listen To The Mother-Fuckin’ Song!

Or Else I Will Cut Off Your Allowance!

I’ll Take Your Fuckin’ Legs While I’m At It!

I Don’t Give Any Shits About How Many Times You Have Mowed The Goddamn Lawn!

LAUGHIN’ IT ALL AWAY!

LAUGHIN’ IT ALL AWAY!

LAUGHIN’ IT ALL AWAY!

LAUGHIN’ IT ALL AWAY!

LAUGHIN’ IT ALL AWAY!

LAUGHIN’ IT ALL AWAY!

LAUGHIN’ IT ALL AWAY!

LAUGHIN’ IT ALL AWAY!

LAUGHIN’ IT ALL AWAY!

“I Wish I had More Cents O’ Humor!”

But I don’t

Bee-Cause I’m Broke!

So

Fuck

The

Fuck

OFF!!!

Go Ahead!

Ask Me How Many Fucks

I Give!

I Dare You!

I Double DOG Dare You!

I Treble – Dog Dare YOU!

Sexy Goddess Elizabeth: My Last Wife, Chapter Two: In France We Kissed On Main Street

Cred for Vid: MysticPieces

(Yeah, I know this is a really old photo, but my thought process goes like this: If Joni ever sees this it may piss her off just enuff to come see me and kick my ass) And I would cherish the ass-kicking. For the rest of my life.

I really have not much to lose at this point.

In France we kissed on Main Street

Video Credit: MysticPieces (oops, I did it again)

********

I was Free To Follow My Desire In Paris

We spent an inordinate amount of time in our lovely, comfy little love shack of a hotel room.

I had fetched along some of my most – favorite movies to share with Ela—Yes, at this point, she had instructed me to call her “Ela” because that was the moniker she went by, but reserved for her ‘closest friends.”—I figured ‘Lovers’—but whatever. I had made it to “Ela Status.” Hoped this boded well for our relationship.

Got one of the Hotel Staff to hook us up with a DVD Player so we could watch the movies I had brought to the soiree:

‘Cabaret’, ‘Hamlet,’ ‘Macbeth.’ Midnight Cowboy,’ ‘Henry V’–Just some ‘Light-Hearted viewing! HAHAHAH!

She loved ‘Henry V’ and ‘Cabaret.’

‘Macbeth’ and ‘Hamlet’ not as much.

We wasted (well, not wasted to me) a lot of time holed up in our little room watching these movies, drinking vin rouge, and making love. I was in Heaven. I had already seen much of The Paris I was interested in seeing (This was not my First ‘Paris Rodeo’—Had been to Paris several times already. As had she.

So we just drank, made love, watched movies, and fell deep IN-LOVE (for the most part)

We did go out, usually in the late evenings to stroll down the Champs-Élysées and hang out at the Café George V.

We were having a wonderful Paris Experience.

But, it was rapidly coming to an end.

She had to return to her ‘Main-Mundane’ in Springfield and I had to return to ‘Le Sandbox’ that was Iraq. We kinda grew morose.

Then I had one of those ‘epiphany things.’

“Ela,” I broached. “Why cannot we just extend our stay here a few more days? I can change our plane tickets, sort things out with the hotel. My job won’t fire me. I am too good at it, as I am sure you are at yours. Let’s stay a few more days.”

She blinked at me through teary eyes, embraced me, kissed me and said, “Oh Yes! Oh Hell Yes!”

Then I got on the telephone to sort out all the logistics and the dice were cast.

It turned out to be a not-so-very-good crap-shoot, but it took some time for that realization to make manifest.

To be continued…

Chapter One Here