The Wino And I Know. “Yeah, Livin’ My Life Like A Song.”

Make Your Own Kind of Music.

I Certainly Make Mine

(Cass Elliott)

I Love Her!

***

“‘Cause I’m livin’ on things that excite me
Be they pastry or lobster or love
I’m just tryin’ to get by bein’ quiet and shy
In a world full of push and shove.”

And, Yes Jimmy: I’ve Also Seen Too Many Places

“The Wino And I Know”

–Jimmy Buffet

Street Cred: MoonLit Water

***

Lance In Not-To Distant Future:

Speaking of “Futures”–My Liver Do Not Have One.

Not A Pleasant One Anyhow.

That’s What The Lovely Young She-Doc Told Me During My Recent Commerce Hospital Adventure told Me Anyway–

She Sent Me Home With Some Scary-Ass Lit:

Two Inches Thick.

Had ‘Family Snaps’ Of MY Liver & Ever’Thang.

I Saved it For My ‘Crap/Snap-Book-Book–

And to Tack to My

“I love Me Wall”

(Just Some ‘Light’ Reading)

For Reminiscing: 

“Hurry; Don’t Be Late”

For Reminiscing: 

Say Moi!

No Wine Before It’s Mine!

Winos!

God Love ‘Em!

Street Cred: MoonLit Water

*****

Bonus Added Value:

King Richard-The-First:

****

I know I am STUPID!

But, I just want to make people

LAUGH!

(This is My Mission)

*****

“Livin’ My Life Like A Song”

–Jimmy B.

“It’s A Strange Situation…

Wild Occupation!”–

JB–Again.

*****

Man Wrote some really Great Shit!

And Yes! I Have Read His Auto-biography–

“A Pirate Looks At Fifty”

It Kinda Sucked–Was All About Nothing But Water-Planes—

I Never Read Another One–The First One Bored Me To Tears

******

I was Disappointed

*****

I generally

Don’t Like

To End My Posts On A Down

NOTE,

But…

This Song…

Is My So-Called Life.

******

Very Long Ago…

“I thought I’d found a life to suit my style.

Obviously I Was Mistaken

“Spider John”

And This Vid Kinda Sucks

But I prefer Old Washed-Up Drunks To Watch,

Rather Than When They Were In-Their-Prime

Below is the Orig Audio Version

For All You ‘Purist Parrot-Parrot-Heads’ Out There In Radio-Land

Here is the Audio-Only Original Version:

******

How Many Good Women Have I Cast Away?

Far Too Many to Count.

But How Many Lotharios Do You Know Who Ever Even Learned To Count Above Ten?

Al Wilson – The Snake:

“You Can’t Be The First, But You Can Be Next.”

Daily Lenny: Performance Film

Here is more from his video recorded performance and yes, most of it is esoteric.

The only video of Lenny (real good video) is from when he was near death. He was most assuredly not at his ‘best’.

But this is all we have.

So we must run with it, because, in my not-so-humble-opinion, his worst was better than the best of Cable Guy, Foxworthy, and even fellow-Texan, Ron White. But that is just me. The only ones who can compare in my mind are George Carlin and Richard Pryor, and possibly Sarah Silverman or Sandra Bernhard.

Carlin RichardSarahSandra

And Thanks For Your Visit.

More Lenny Discovered Here

http://texantales.com/category/lenny-bruce/

Stealthily…

 

Just Shoot Me! Why, Oh Why? Why is WP So Fukked–zUP? My ‘Links’ Are ALL Convoluted!–Too Much Empty Space Between The Space!” WHY?!

This Irritates The Fuk Outta Me!

I AM NOT A Nice Person When Yu Irritate the Fuk Outta me–

Trust Me:

I have References.

My Only ‘Work-Around’ is to DELETE My ‘Featured’ Image!

I DO NOT WANT To Do That!

Mister Bill!

Why????

***

Mr Bill Safety Tips:

Street Cred: Jeremiah Hupka

****

Alcoholics,” or As Janis Oft Refrained:

“I Don’t Do Drugs: I’m A ‘Juicer'”

(Of Course, She Was Lying)–

She Did Everything!

Sadly,

That’s How We Came To Lose Her In Nineteen Seventy.

Broke My Heart.

Truly Did

Just For Ref:

Janis

“It Don’t Make No difference Babe”

Have you ever gotten so drunk that you Fell

UP

The Down Staircase?

I Know I have!

And More Than Thrice

Now Yes, I know:

I Write A Lot About Drunks

Dat’s Because

I

“R”

One

But I Appear To Be…

In Good Company

And It’s So Much More Fun

To Slow-Kill One’s Self this Way

Than the Other Way

The Fast Way

“Don’t Bogart That Joint My Friend;

Pass It Over To Me”

The Greatest Bullshit Story Ever Told

“Roll Another One. Just Like The Other One”

Don’t Touch My Bags If You Please

Mister Custom’s Man

^^^^

“Up The Down Staircase”

*****

Robin:

*****

Richard:

*****

Ernest

****

Old Hollywood Stars Who Were ALWAYS Drunk

***********

Tanya!

Y’all’ll Havta Scroll Down On This One

If’n You Wanna see Tanya

Aint No Free Rides In This Mouse House

I Saved The Best For Last

Yep. My Mind Has Gone Awry: Into That ‘Null-an’ Void Territory’–The Black Hole ‘Land Of The Time Sink’– “Meet Mr. Lance, BROADCAST NEWS JUNKIE”

Into The Perilous Void:

Richard Pryor: The Wino and The Junkie

“Better Lay Off That Narcotic Ni*gger”:

“That Shit Done Made You Null And Void”

*****

Yes, this is a ‘Shit Post’

F*ck it!

Watch the below vid.

You will laugh your ass off.

Ditto this one below

Vid Cred: MAD LAB

***

But this is a light-hearted Shit Post, mocking me even more than I mock Broadcast News: CNN, MSNBC, Fox, Etcetera & Ad Nausea

And I am stalling, waiting for MS Muse to respond to my recent

Proposal of Marriage

She is sitting on the couch as I type these words.

(Yeah, she came home after the lights and water were restored)

I am beginning to find her a ‘fair-weather’ muse. Just sayin’.

Don’t matter. I still love her.

She had all her props:

  • Glass of Pinot.
  • Virginia Slim
  • Cell Phone
  • IPad
  • NY Times, Washington Post, And Waco Weekly Wipe
  • Attitude

Yeah. There’s that.

Always that.

Always That Attitude: Nuclear Option

*****

This post cannot stand alone on my prose.

The vids are requisite.

“I just have to look good; I don’t have to be clear.”

The volume is borked. So CRANK it up. (Video Credit: Video Music, via The YouTubes—Duh!)

Love Broadcast News.

Love Mocking Broadcast News.

Love the Eye-Candy ‘Info-Babes’ on Broadcast News. (Broadcast News puts the ‘Broad’ in News)

Andrea Tantaros CNN Bra Size & Measurements

Andrea Tantaros: CNN, Bra Size & Measurements

Guys, you know you want me to drop the link.

No!

Suffer in Silence

*******

Love that I harbor no true malice toward Broadcast News, but G’damn! they are so transparent with their bias.

Added Value: Holly-Go-Lightly

I sincerely hope you have enjoyed this brief interlude shit post I wrote while cooling my heels waiting for MS Muse to respond to my Proposal of Marriage

Cheers!

(‘Story at Eleven’)

*****

Bonus ‘Added Value’

Credit to John Ward: Genius Man

“No, it’s awful.”

My Cross to bear

My Spirit ‘Man-able’: Ted Koppel

Video Compilation Credit Below: iLoveChrisCuomo

Uh… Homo-Erotica?

CNN: The Most Trusted Name In News?

Am I homo-phobic?

No! But these two wear me out!

Some of my Best Friends are Fags (This is a JOKE BTW!)

“I love you Don Lemon.”

You never fail to entertain.

Now Please Excuse me while I puke—‘vacuate’ my stomach.

And my mind.

“The Memes Become Reality”

–IanMilesCheong

Don & Chris:

Two Marshmallows Colliding in Mid-Air:

Ignore the below, the last on your radio dial, because WordPress is FUCKED UP!

Won’t let me delete it!

It just keeps spinning ‘round an’ ‘round sucking up bandwidth.

Bandwidth I have not to spare,

Nor desire to share.

Fuck you WordPress!

“Uploading” it perpetually says.

Hey Whore-Press!

How ‘bout I ‘upload’ my Nine Millimeter into your dome?

How would that grab ya?

Add-Din-Dumb:

I got ‘on the horn’ w/WP

Kind service rep fixed my problem.

Toot Sweet

All-in-all, WP has Great Customer Service.

No denying that.

I take back my un-happy words hurled at WordPress… until the next time…

Why, Oh Why? Why is WP So Fukked zUP? My ‘Links Are ALL Convoluted!–Too Much Empty Space Between The Space!”

Alcoholics,” or As Janis Oft Refrained:

“I Don’t Do Drugs: I’m A ‘Juicer'” (Of Course, She Was Lying)–

She Did Everything!

Sadly,

That’s How We Came To Lose Her In Nineteen Seventy.

Broke My Heart.

Truly Did

Just For Ref:

Janis

“It Don’t Make No difference Babe”

Have you ever gotten so drunk that you Fell

UP

The Down Staircase?

I Know I have!

And More Than Thrice

Now Yes, I know:

I Write A Lot About Drunks

Dat’s Because

I

“R”

One

But I Appear To Be…

In Good Company

And It’s So Much More Fun

To Slow-Kill One’s Self this Way

Than the Other Way

The Fast Way

“Don’t Bogart That Joint My Friend;

Pass It Over To Me”

The Greatest Bullshit Story Ever Told

“Roll Another One. Just Like The Other One”

Don’t Touch My Bags If You Please

Mister Custom’s Man

^^^^

“Up The Down Staircase”

*****

Robin:

*****

Richard:

*****

Ernest

****

Old Hollywood Stars Who Were ALWAYS Drunk

***********

Tanya!

Y’all’ll Havta Scroll Down On This One

If’n You Wanna see Tanya

Aint No Free Rides In This Mouse House

I Saved The Best For Last