On First Meeting Michelle—Did Not Go So Well–It Got Better, But Then I Fucked It Up. (As Usual)

The Beatles Live- Michelle My Belle:

Cred for Vid Share: Maco939

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It Got Better, But Then I Fucked It Up. (As Usual) And if You are Assuming, Presuming, It Was Physical Abuse, Then You Are Deluded. And Have Not ‘Read’ Me—It Was ‘Neglect’ On My Part: Michelle Expected More From Me Than I Was Capable of Giving. That Was It. I am An Idiot! I Threw Away The Love of A Good Woman and a Kindred Spirit. She Was My Chance to Grasp That Brass Ring! A Military Woman–Whom I Respected! A True Patriot! And A Bona-Fide Sailor! And Like A Fool, I Just Let Her Walk Away.

I Know This Photo Below Is A Brit She-Sailor,

But I Love Her Face

And

She Is ALMOST As Beautiful

As

“My Michelle”

Michelle, ma belle
These are words that go together well
My Michelle
Michelle, ma belle
Sont les mots qui vont tres bien ensemble
Tres bien ensemble
I love you, I love you, I love you
That’s all I want to say
Until I find a way
I will say the only words I know that you’ll understand

Author’s Note:

This Was Yet Another Relationship That I Managed to Mangle & Fuck Up.

&

Let Her Slip Away

Yes! I Have Regrets!

In The Recruit Training Command at That time There Was A Volunteer Program We Could “Volunteer” For. It Was Called “Saturday Scholars” One Could Get Out of Saturday Duty if one Signed Up.

Michelle and I Signed Up.

The ‘Program’ Was to go to The Inner-City Ghettos of Chicago and Tutor Poor Black Kids. Michelle and I Were actually Very Sincere About This ‘Work’ and We Bonded Every Saturday as we rode the Bus To Chicago. We Wanted to do Good Work–Serve The Community–Honourably Represent Our Navy.

Which We Both Loved Equally

I loved her very much–Even More Than The Navy

We Were Cut From The Same Cloth, I Thought, but as I said,

I Eventually Managed to Fuck That Up Somehow

I am very Good In This Regard

Call me An ‘Overachiever’ If You Must

South Park: In the Ghetto:

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Elvis Presley – In the Ghetto

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Dateline: Late 1985

Time: 0800 hrs.

Geographical Location: Great Mistakes Naval Training Center—Just south of Chicago.

Venue: A Navy Auditorium

Suspect: One Ricky-Recruit, AKA

“Marcom-The Moron”

*Slips now into first-person narrative*

I had arrived just a little later than was prudent.

Hence, no seats in the back of the venue.

Searched about. Scanning…

Only open seats were in the front row.

****

I took myself up-front, found a seat next to a serious-looking blond she-sailor, decked out in freshly pressed dress blues. AJ-Squared-Away, she was.

Old Military / Sailor Saw: “Never sit up front and never volunteer for nothin.

I had already broken the first rule. I was about to Break The Second…

****

I was in dungarees—not pressed. Certainly not ‘AJ-Squared away’… slightly hung-over, if I am aiming at honest narrative here.

‘Under-Dressed’ does not even come close.

I had plopped down to her starboard.

Risked a look at her.

(I had already lost myself in her eyes)

She sensed my gaze, looked me dead in my eye and said,

“What are you staring at Sailor? Hi. My name is Michelle. What’s yours?” She said as she extended her hand.

I shook her hand and was surprised to experience a very firm grip/handshake.

A Naval Officer took to the old, very old wooden podium and began his spiel, trying to sell us on ‘Saturday Scolars.’ and drag out some volunteers.

Michelle went Eyes-Front: Intensely paying serious Military Attention.

I did not.

I kept gazing at her…

To the point of being too obvious.

Oh! And BTW, it did not escape me that she was a 3rd Class Petty Officer.

And an ‘ET–Electronics Techincian’

An E-4

She seriously ‘out-ranked’ me–in Brains and Beauty

And, obvious to me:

Out-Classed me.

In the Nav, we called them ‘IPO’s

“Instant Petty Officer”

If you Graduate from the ‘Right Navy School,’ you are auto-magically promoted.

I was, my own self, enrolled in such a school, but the successful end game—of MY Graduation—was tenuous at best.

Not my intent to bash Y’all over the head with a not-so-subtle…

But this do serve my narrative.

Serves it well…

Well….

Credit: Ethereal Music

To be continued…

Previously

Updated! Expanded! Someone ‘Liked’ This Moldy Old Post, So… Natch… ReSpam!.. “B&B No! Not Just For Bed & Breakfast Anymore!” Yes. I am a MORON! Yuk Yuk Yuk! Hardy Har Har!

Fun Fact: When I was ‘Marred’ to Lisa-The-Shakespeare Prof, MTV ran what they Dubbed

‘A Moron-a-Thon’

Five HOURS of Beavis & Butthead–Commercial-Free!

We had to keep a bed-pan at our feet so as to not miss a single minute—

OK, that is not really true…. I made it up.

Call it ‘Creative License

********

Lisa and I watched it all!

All five fukkin’ hours!

Took us three bottles of Chardonnay to get thru it

*****

I tortured my Facebook friends with these; figured I’d torture my WordPress friends as well.

What the Hell, right?

”Sharing is CARING.”

Original FB text from my three demented posts:

“Hey Baby.”

You will laugh

(If you’re sick and demented like me)

(Vid compilation credit: Gary Diablo)

More sick humor.(definitely NOT for everyone)

You’re welcome.

(Vid compilation credit: MMM)

And of course this is the All-Time-Classic:

“The Great Cornholio”

OK. I will stop ‘Shit-Posting’ (for now)

Sorry. I know I am sick in my head. I just want to make at least one person laugh with me.

Bonus Clip Below

Ponder this while you are savoring your next fast-food burger.

Good luck.

And of course: Customers SUCK

This Man (CERTAINLY) is a fucking genius.

Fun Fact: He was born in Guayaquil, Ecuador.

I did not know this, but now I know. And now so do you.

(If you’ve come this far.)

Mike Judge: Bona-Fide Brilliance:

Added Stupid Value:

(Because I’m stupid)

Ask me how many fucks I give

This is MY BLOG

And I’m stuck to it

Oh, and once again:

“Fuck You WordPress!”

(I always like to throw that in)

Just for ‘grins.’

And while on this silly subject, some more stupid silliness:

******************

Added Just Because I LOVE Her:

Who Will Save My Soul?

You will Jewel

You Will

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Even MORE Clown World–See-Quill–Part DUH. WIP! I’ll Edit This LATER! (And Most Likely ADD To It)

Cred: Mark Dice

Cred: Salty Cracker

Cred: Salty Cracker

Cred: Dice Man

***

Cred: Kurzgesagt – In a Nutshell

***

I Have Had The WuFlu

TWICE NOW

I am STILL Here!

And Yes! I Have Had My Fauci!

Appears As If I Will Continue to Survive

And ‘Sailor On’

Y’all!

Cred: Gloria Gaynor

It’s Not ALL Bad News

And Now For Something Completely Different

To Lighten This Mood

Crit Drinker Man

Why Modern Movies Suck – They’re Written By Children

Credit: The Critical Drinker

https://www.youtube.com/c/TheCriticalDrinker

UPDATED! MORE VIDS “AMERICA HAS LOST ITS FUKKING MIND! WE ARE LIVING IN CLOWN WORLD! (Yes! This Post May Be Disturbing to Some Casual Readers, But Those of YOU Who KNOW Me, Know That I am INSANE!) Other than THAT, I’m a real SWELL Guy. May I take Your Daughter to The Prom? I’ll have Her Home By Dawn!”

MUST WATCH OR Y’ALL MISS THE ENTIRE POINT OF THIS EXERCISE

Cred: Salty Cracker

Website: https://saltmustflow.com

SEND IN THE CLOWNS

Cred for Vid: Paragon Kelvin (And of course: Sinatra)

The JOKER DANCE!

Crit Drinker Review!

JOKER!

HAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!

This is

REALLY IMPORTANT!

FUKKIN’ WATCH IT!

PLEASE!

Cred: Crit Drinker Man! My MAN!

****

Arthur Shoots Asshole

BRAVO!

****

Y’all know I wouldn’t hurt a fly.

OK

THAT’S

A

LIE!

I HATE FLIES!

****

MORE BATSHIT CRAZINESS!

Cuomo is in DEEP SHIT!

Cred: Salt Man

Sh*thole Cities Run by Leftists 💩

Cred: Paul Joseph Watson

Rumor Is That Joe Biden Pooped Himself At Vatican Meeting

Cred: Salt Man

The Left is Losing Their Minds Over This New Documentary Film!


Cred: Dice Man

***

Topher – Let’s Go Brandon (feat. @D.Cure & @The Marine Rapper)

***

Trump Explodes Lefty Heads By Doing Tomahawk Chop At World Series

Cred: Salt Man

***

Production Hell – Batwoman

Cred: Crit Drinker Man

UPDATED! “AMERICA HAS LOST ITS FUKKING MIND! WE ARE LIVING IN CLOWN WORLD! (Yes! This Post May Be Disturbing to Some Casual Readers, But Those of YOU Who KNOW Me, Know That I am INSANE!) Other than THAT, I’m a real SWELL Guy. May I take Your Daughter to The Prom? I’ll have Her Home B4 Midnight!”

MUST WATCH OR Y’ALL MISS THE ENTIRE POINT OF THIS EXERCISE

Cred: Salty Cracker

Website: https://saltmustflow.com

SEND IN THE CLOWNS

Cred for Vid: Paragon Kelvin (And of course: Sinatra)

The JOKER DANCE!

Crit Drinker Review!

JOKER!

HAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!

This is

REALLY IMPORTANT!

FUKKIN’ WATCH IT!

PLEASE!

Cred: Crit Drinker Man! My MAN!

****

Arthur Shoots Asshole

BRAVO!

****

Y’all know I wouldn’t hurt a fly.

OK

THAT’S

A

LIE!

I HATE FLIES!

****

MORE BATSHIT CRAZINESS!

Cred: Salt Man

Cuomo is in DEEP SHIT!

Sh*thole Cities Run by Leftists 💩

Cred: Paul Joseph Watson

B&B (No! Not Bed & Breakfast)

I tortured my Facebook friends with these; figured I’d torture my WordPress friends as well.

What the Hell, right?

”Sharing is CARING.”

Original FB text from my three demented posts:

“Hey Baby.”

You will laugh

(If you’re sick and demented like me)

(Vid compilation credit: Gary Diablo)

More sick humor.(definitely NOT for everyone)

You’re welcome.

(Vid compilation credit: MMM)

And of course this is the All-Time-Classic:

“The Great Cornholio”

OK. I will stop ‘Shit-Posting’ (for now)

Sorry. I know I am sick in my head. I just want to make at least one person laugh with me.

Bonus Clip Below

Ponder this while you are savoring your next fast-food burger.

Good luck.

And of course: Customers SUCK

This Man (CERTAINLY) is a fucking genius.

Fun Fact: He was born in Guayaquil, Ecuador.

I did not know this, but now I know. And now so do you.

(If you’ve come this far.)

Added Stupid Value:

(Because I’m stupid)

Ask me how many fucks I give

This is MY BLOG

And I’m stuck to it

Oh, and once again:

“Fuck You WordPress!”

(I always like to throw that in)

Just for ‘grins.’

And while on this silly subject, some more stupid silliness: