Shonnie, The Biker’s Wife, Part Four Yeh I ‘ctully Write this Shite. Yeh, My Keybord Is Still Broke-Dick Dog

Shonnie Saga: Part Four

Parts One,   Two,   Three.

We spent that Friday afternoon and most of Saturday enjoying the Bluegrass festival while swilling beers and smoking lots of cigarettes. During the late evenings we would share burgers, listen to all sorts of music on my little boom box, drink whiskey and have great sex. We also talked of many things, but nothing too heavy. We were enjoying ourselves.

Sunday noon we checked out of the motel and sadly headed west back to San Dog. It had been a perfect weekend and I truly regretted the ending of it. Shonnie impressed me more and more with her worldly wisdom, and in spite of no formal higher education, she seemed to know a lot about a lot. Mostly about the important shit: Life. She had not one ounce of pretentiousness in her small body. (Small, very sexy body) Both of us were inventive and creative in bed. Did I mention the sex was fantastic? I am certain I did.

Knowing my duty schedule on the USS Frederick, I knew it would be three weeks until I had another weekend completely devoid of any responsibilities as a sailor. I had already formulated a plan to ‘kidnap’ her when that free weekend came about.

During the ensuing days we kept up our regular rendezvous schedule. More and more I looked forward to seeing her and getting to know her even better. She was reluctant to tell me very much about her life, but bits and pieces did come out between slow dancing, drinking, smoking, and fucking. Her father had left her and her mother when she was still quite young. ‘He was an abusive type’, was about all the detail I got from her, but I could occasionally catch a glimpse of sorrow and pain in her eyes. I refrained from broaching the subject of her husband-the-biker. In fact, the fact that she was married at all, slipped away from my mind like so much quick silver…

One Saturday night she had me drive us to a Mall.

“Okay, what are we doing here?” I asked her. Malls ain’t my thing, you see.”

“I wanna buy you something,” she replied.

“Oh no you don’t. I have everything I need.”

“No. You need this, c’mon.”

She led me to a record shop and began searching the bins.

“What’re you looking for?” I asked.

“Gimme a sec. Oh here it is,” she announced happily pulling a cassette from the bin.

“What’s that?”

“You’ll love it. Trust me.”

“I’m already in-love….with you, you crazy bitch.”

She purchased Nighthawks at the Diner by Tom Waits, an artist I had never heard of….

Until Shonnie.

 

We drove to Balboa Park,  and opening some beers to go with our whiskey we listened to the cassette. I loved it from the very first minute. My Girl had me all figured out. It was just a little disconcerting, how she had so easily pegged me and yet to me she was still mostly an enigma.

After the sun set we started our make out session, then she did something unexpected. She unbuckled my jeans and started giving me head. This had never happened before and to say I was quite pleased would be an understatement bordering on the felonious. Just as I was really getting into it, she stopped suddenly, looked up at me with those piercing blue eyes and said solemnly, “If you come in my mouth, I will kill you.”

Well, that kind of ruined ‘My’ moment, but actually in a good way. It struck me so funny that I just could not help bursting out laughing. It was priceless. Make out session temporarily put on hold and my fondness for her intensified.

The next weekend (my ‘freedom’ one), we met at our usual rendezvous point. She, on instructions from me given over a pay phone, had brought along a bag with extra clothes and whatever other tricks of her trade she needed for a two-and-a-half day ‘excursion’, along with a pass from her mom relieving her of motherly duties for the weekend.

“So Cowboy, where are we going?”

“Vegas,” I said. “My turn to ‘educate’ you My Love.”

 

 

“Woolworth  Rhinestone diamond earrings and a sideways glance”

Greatest line from any song.

To be continued…  FIVE HERE

 

******

How I recall my Wonderful, Magical Months Spent with Shonnie:

Cred: Chris Isaak

I Have Successfully Climbed Back Onboard My Wagon–Wish Me Luck–Gonna be A Bumpy Ride: Lots of Potholes To Avoid. I’d Better Strap In. Tight!–Fasten My Seat-Belt

Y’all Do Recall: The One I was Pushed OFF Of!

Gene Autry – Back in the Saddle Again

Quitting Booze is easy.

I’ve done it dozens of times.

The ‘quitting’ is easy.

The staying ‘quit’ is the challenge.

And then there is always DT Man to Deal With initially, and that’s a ‘visitation’ I wouldn’t wish even on my worst enemy.

(Not a pleasant fellow)

Anyway, here I am again.

“Once More Unto The Breach!”

***********

I have been battling booze all my life, ever since I was thirteen years old. Gain ground, lose ground. The war is always raging on. No end in sight. No way the boys will ever be home for Christmas. That’s the reality.

I have come to accept it.

Cred for Vid: Thru the Reel Films

*****

Street Cred: MasterBiblicalMemory &

Tom Waits-for-No-Man

***********

This May Be Part of My Problem.

NAW!

That’s Bullshit!

I Drink Alone – George Thorogood and the Destroyers

Vid Compilation Share Cred: Thergothon1

******

Demi Lovato – Sober

*****

******

Copperhead Road

Street Cred: Steve Earle

Bonus!

(On Us)

TV Dinners Are Keepin’ Me Alive! Sad Commentary, Eh? Left-Over Food. Left-Over Dreams. Fallin’ Apart At The Seams.

Ed. Note: I Find It Hysterically Funny (And Apropos) That I Posted This On April Fool’s Day!

That’s Just Me

Below:

Lance A. ‘Bubba’ Marcom

The Man

The Myth

The Legend

HaHaHa!

Pure-D White Trash

Lance-A-Lot O’Trash:

Charter Member In Good Standing Of The

NAAWT

“National Association For The Advancement Of White Trash”

Just A Big Kid Havin’ Fun.

Don’t Take It Personal Y’all

HaHaHa!

“White Trash” – Tom MacDonald & Madchild

“Happy And Broke”

*****

My Fridge:

Left On my Bed. Instead. No worries. I can sleep around it.

I’ve got enough left-over food (some weeks gone-by of age-Waste not. Want not!) in my fridge to ‘Feed Cox’s Army’

‘Feed Cox’s Army…’ An expression Janet (An EX) used to hurl at me upon often occasion.

Anyway… I got NO Room! No ROOM! For my Beer! But I don’t care!

I am sorta European in this regard.
I LOVE Warm Beer!

Yes! Yes! Yes! I know:

I am pure-dee Bona-Fide White Trash.

“Warm Beer & Cold Women; I Just Don’t Fit In”

Cred: Tom Waits For No Man

“Time to get down to drinkin’–

Tell the Band to Play The Blues.”

“I’m at the Last Ditch Attempt Saloon”

And I LOVE TV Dinners!

(If the sauce is not too blue)

Astute observers will note the

Ouija Board

in this video below

****

Added Value:

I Do LOVE Me Some Dixie Chicks

OOps!

Caint Say ‘Dixie’ No Mas

My Bad

“White Trash Weddin'”

Bye Fer Now

Y’all come back now, ya he’ah

Gonna Re-Drink this–Screw U Alcohol! You’re A Cruel Mistress. You Give And You Take—Mostly You Just Take: My Car, My Smokes, My life, All Four Of My Wives. My Mind… My Mind, Never Mind… I Rarely Use It Anyhow. Good Luck With It. Have A Blast!

But, G’Damn, She is One Sexy Bitch! I Go Willingly. And I Am In-Love With Elizabeth Shue. Who Coulda Knew? Me! That’s Who!

Most diseases have some chance for a cure.

There is NO Cure for Alcoholism.

None

Nada

It is just something one has to come to terms with.

Trust me Kids:

I have been battling with her ever since I was thirteen years old.

But I’m still standing!

And fighting the good fight!

Still Standin’!

The Piano Computer Has Been Drinking

Cred: MasterBiblicalMemory

*****

If I try to cast her out…

Well, this outcome is

WAY

Worse

It takes a long time to drink yourself to death.

The DT’s can kill you in a week, or even less.

Depending on the weather

“I came here to drink myself to death”


Damn! Damn! Damn! G’Damn! How I Do Still Miss Her! “Shonnie, The Biker’s Wife Part Four” “Night Hawks”

We spent the rest of that Friday and most of Saturday enjoying the Bluegrass Festival while swilling beers and smoking lots of cigarettes.

During the late evenings we shared burgers, listened to all sorts of music on my little boom box, drank whiskey and had great sex.

We also talked a lot about a lot of things, but nothing too heavy.

We were enjoying ourselves.

Sunday noon we checked out of the motel and slightly sorrowfully, headed west back to San Dog. It had been a truly perfect weekend and we both regretted the ending of it.

Shonnie impressed me more and more with her worldly wisdoms, and in spite of having no formal higher education, she seemed to know a lot about a lot. Mostly about the important shit: Life.

She had not one ounce of insincerity, pretentiousness, nor of ‘I’m a Sexy Diva wrapped in a small, concentrated package. Worship me’ in her small little body. (Small, very sexy, very energetic little body) Both of us were inventive and creative in bed, but she could’ve been some kind of ‘Concentrated Diva’ had she wanted to.

She didn’t want to.

She knew exactly Who She was and Who She wanted to be:

Just Shonnie.

Did I mention the sex with her was fantastic?

Fairly certain I did.

Knowing my duty schedule on the Callaghan, I knew it would be three weeks until I had another weekend completely devoid of any sailor related responsibilities.

I had already formulated a plan to ‘kidnap’ Her when that free weekend came to pass, and me with my ‘Weekend Pass’.

During the ensuing days we kept up our regular rendezvous schedule. More and more I looked forward to seeing her and getting to know her even better. In fact, time spent away from her was beginning to become more and more unbearable.

“This is not good Sailor,” I kept trying to remind myself, “You have allowed yourself to become vulnerable. If you lose this one, you’re gonna have a Very Bad Day-Week-Month-Year—Life.”

She was reluctant to tell me very much about her life, but bits and pieces did come out during slow dancing, drinking, smoking, and fucking, ‘making love’.

Her father had left her and her mother when she was still quite young. ‘He was an abusive drunk type’, was about all the detail I got from her, but I could occasionally catch a glimpse of sorrow and pain in her eyes whenever I asked about her ‘growing up years’.

So I quit asking.

We were living in-the-moment, Our Moment. Hers and My moment. So Fucking Happy Together.

Honestly Happy Every Moment We Were Together.

Un Happy Every Moment We Weren’t.

(Making a hopeful assumption here, regarding how ‘She’ was feeling during the times we were not together)

Happy Together – The Turtles (1967) Vid Share Cred: Cameron Posh

***

This is what we were all about: The in-the-moment-happy-together-existence. Carrying on as the slightly flawed, yet also slightly perfect, ‘couple’ and ‘match.’

I refrained completely from broaching the subject of her husband-the-biker. In fact, the mere fact that she was married at all had rapidly run away from my brain like so much spilt quicksilver…

One Saturday night she had me drive us to a Mall.

“Okay, what are we doing here?” I asked. “Malls ain’t my thing.”

“Mine neither, but I wanna buy you something.

“Oh Hell-no-you-don’t. I have everything I need.”

It’s Important to ME, damn it!” she replied. You gonna give me attitude now, Sailor-Boy?” You need this, c’mon.”

She led me by the hand to the mall and into a ‘musicland’ record shop.

None too delicately, she immediately attacked the cassette bins. When Shonnie is in pursuit of something, Any Something that is ‘important’ to Her, there is no holding her back, slowing her down, and don’t even foolishly consider trying to stop her.

“What’re you looking for?” I asked finally, as she kept up her ransacking efforts.

“Gimme a sec! Will ya? Oh here it is!” she announced a little too loudly, pulling a cassette from the bin and keeping it from my view.

“What’s that?”

“You’ll love it. Just trust me.”

“I’m already in-LOVE. With YOU, you crazy Bitch.” (I did NOT say this aloud; only in my head.)

She had in her clutches, Nighthawks at the Diner, she eventually allowed me to discover. It was an album by Tom Waits, an artist I had never heard of…

Until Shonnie…

She made me keep my distance once she had captured her quarry and headed toward the check-out.

“Go stand over there while I pay for this,” she commanded while pointing to the very front of the store.

I dutifully did as ordered while shaking my head. Thinking “Well, That’s My Gal.”

We drove to Balboa Park.

I found a nice, secluded place for the Toranado. Cracked open some beers to go with our whiskey while Shonnie dropped in the ‘Mystery Cassette’ and twisted the volume knob.

Up.

Way Up.

“Stand by for heavy rolls as the ship comes about Sailor-Boy,” she giggled.

(I sincerely wished she’d stop calling me that, but it seemed to make her happy to do so and what a small price for me to pay to see her wonderful smile and hear her wonderful laugh.)

I’d taught her that, my most favorite bona-fide ‘sailor-phrase’, although I could not remember when or even why—at least she remembered—and when used properly in context and in a suitable situation, it is a handy phrase to have in one’s repertoire.  

Twenty seconds into Waits’ ‘Opening Intro,’ I was a fan. Call it ‘love-at-first listen’, an extremely rare occurrence for me.

But My Girl had me all figured out.

It was just a little disconcerting, how she had so easily tagged, pegged, and captured me, and yet to me she was still mostly an enigma.

“OK. Show me the cassette case now please,”

“Here ya go Baby, she said, handing it to me.

“’Tom Waits’. Never heard of him, but this is some great shit Shonnie Darlin’.”

She smiled demurely at me and said, “Yeah, I know, and now so do you. You’re welcome.”

I grabbed her and kissed her for a long time. Finally she pulled away from my embrace.

“Time enough for that later. Listen to the music. The whole album is one story. Kinda like a thin book. Pay fuckin’ attention.”

“Okay. Okay. No need to get all testy.”

She softened her voice and cooed, “Pay fucking attention, please. How’s that?”

“Better,” I said, as I tried to kiss her again.

“For fuck’s sake. Listen to the Goddamn story.”

“I am. I love good stories and when folded into great music. Bam! I was just pushing your ‘Shonnie Button’. And I am paying attention.”

She sweetly glared at me.

(“Should I tell her now?” I was asking myself. “No.” was the answer I received. “Wait for Vegas. Then tell her. You will know when the time is right.”)

Then I hung up the phone in my head and hundred percent focused my attentions on Shonnie and Tom (And the Jim Beam I was enjoying.)

Warm Beer and Cold Women

***

After the sun set we started our make out session. Then she did something very much unexpected. She unbuckled my jeans and started giving me head.

This had never happened before and to say I was quite pleased would be an understatement bordering on the felonious.

Just as I was really getting into it, she stopped suddenly, looked up at me with those piercing blue eyes and said solemnly,

“If you come in my mouth, I will kill you.”

Well, that kind of ruined ‘My’ Moment, but actually in a good way. It struck me so funny that I just could not help bursting out laughing. It was priceless.

Make out session temporarily put on hold and my fondness for her greatly amplified.

The next weekend (my ‘freedom’ one), we met at our usual rendezvous point. She, on instructions from me given over a pay phone, had brought along a bag with extra clothing items and whatever else ‘tricks of her trade’ she needed for a sustained two-and-a-half day ‘excursion’.

She also had a signed ‘liberty pass’ from her mom relieving her of motherly duties for the weekend. (Ok, she did not have an actual ‘signed’ document—I made that up—but she did have verbal permission and even a blessing from her mother.)

Thanks ‘Mom.’

“So Cowboy, where are we going?”

“Vegas,” I said. “’Sin City’. Should be right up your alley. My turn to ‘educate’ you My Love.”

‘Love?’ How did that slip out?

Had I already told her that I loved her? While drunk perhaps? Pretty sure I had not at that point, but it was on my ‘To Do List’ and a weekend in Vegas would put me in the perfect environment to take such a gamble with my heart.

I just have to remember the old gamblers mantra in-case she did not love me back yet:

“Never throw good money after bad.” 

“Night Hawks”

Perfect Metaphor for Lance and Shonnie Together

“Woolworth  Rhinestone diamond earrings and a sideways glance”

–Greatest line from any song.

***

One Might Also Describe Our Relationship in Terms of “Opposites Attract.”

Shonnie and I had a very complex relationship.

Not on the Surface

But Deep

Deep Down Inside

It Was Forever Bubbling, Burning, Boiling

Deeply Inside Both of Us

Volatile and Dangerous

****

Previously:https://texantales.com/2023/04/02/shonnie-the-bikers-wife-chapter-three-desert-dreams-sex-and-music/

Look For This Very Soon:

Shonnie, The Biker’s Wife. Part V: Vegas

Update: Part Five Found Here:

****

Some Bonus ‘Added Value’ below for all you Waits Fans out there in ‘Radio Land.’

“Emotional Weather Report”

Putnam County

***

And Yet Even More ‘Added Value’ Below:

How I recall the Mystical Magic That Life Held for Me During My Time Spent with Shonnie:

“Wicket Games”

Chris Isaak

***

Commentary Below From The Original Post.

For Continuity, Please Start at the Bottom and Read Up

And Thank You if you have made it this far.

Best Regards,

Lance

LAMarcom June 20, 2014 at 18:31 Edit

Thank you Sadie 🙂

Yep, after all my years and all my wives, I still do not quite understand women. I guess if I did, some of the magic would go away. (No. That is not sexist–it is just that the female mind fascinates me)

😉

~ Sadie ~ June 20, 2014 at 17:44 Edit

Loving this story, Mr. Marcum 🙂 “It was just a little disconcerting, how she had so easily pegged me and yet to me she was still mostly an enigma.” — love the way you worded this & YES we women can be awfully good at that, at times 😉 Can’t wait to read more!!!

lauramacky June 20, 2014 at 09:16 Edit

you’re welcome!

LAMarcom June 20, 2014 at 09:12 Edit

Thanks for the kind words Mark. Movie eh? Writing it and remembering those days does run like a movie in my mind.

Cheers My Friend

LAMarcom June 20, 2014 at 09:10 Edit

Waits is definitely one of my favorites. I have Shonnie to thank for that!

Thanks Laura!

lauramacky June 20, 2014 at 09:05 Edit

I haven’t listened to Tom waits in ages! 🙂

markbialczak June 20, 2014 at 08:33 Edit

This is shaping up as a pretty interesting movie, Lance. Really. Especially if it keeps getting better, as I suspect. Write on!

LAMarcom June 20, 2014 at 08:11 Edit

And ‘Chocolate Jesus’ 😉

Thanks for your visit! And for your comment.

Cheers, -Lance

LAMarcom June 20, 2014 at 08:09 Edit

Hahaha!

I will! I will!

Cheers Mate!

happierheathen June 20, 2014 at 03:56 Edit

Dammit, man, get to writing! 🙂

Diana June 20, 2014 at 02:58 Edit

ohhh….”please call me baby” and “the heart of saturday night” – – my two favorite tom waits songs.

LAMarcom June 19, 2014 at 23:44 Edit

Thanks.

Means a lot coming from you.

Teela Hart June 19, 2014 at 23:42 Edit

I will most definitely stay tuned.

How could I not?

You tell a damn good story!

😀

T

LAMarcom June 19, 2014 at 23:38 Edit

I’ll give you a hint…

Naw.

You just gotta stay tuned.

Thanks for reading.

🙂

P.S. Next to Lenny, Tom Waits is my Hero.

Along with Janis, Jimi, Jimmy, Willie, Waylon, Kris, Jim M., …and on and on..

Teela Hart June 19, 2014 at 23:35 Edit

I knew nothing of Tom Waits until visiting.

I really love his sound.

I’m loving the saga, we never know what’s comin next.

🙂

LAMarcom June 19, 2014 at 23:01 Edit

I have left little pieces of me all over Las Vegas.

Hahahah

Thanks Friend for your visit and comment.

Cheers,

-Lance

quarksire June 19, 2014 at 22:59 Editeducate er loose 🙂 LoL 🙂 .ya neva know! 🙂

Yeah. Re-Shit Post: “Shonnie, The Biker’s Wife, Part Four” Shonnie Invades My Mind. I used to be a writer. Now I am just a bull-shit artist. Alas.

Shonnie Saga: Part Four

Parts One,   Two,   Three.

We spent that Friday afternoon and most of Saturday enjoying the Bluegrass festival while swilling beers and smoking lots of cigarettes. During the late evenings we would share burgers, listen to all sorts of music on my little boom box, drink whiskey and have great sex. We also talked of many things, but nothing too heavy. We were enjoying ourselves.

Sunday noon we checked out of the motel and sadly headed west back to San Dog. It had been a perfect weekend and I truly regretted the ending of it. Shonnie impressed me more and more with her worldly wisdom, and in spite of no formal higher education, she seemed to know a lot about a lot. Mostly about the important shit: Life. She had not one ounce of pretentiousness in her small body. (Small, very sexy body) Both of us were inventive and creative in bed. Did I mention the sex was fantastic? I am certain I did.

Knowing my duty schedule on the USS Frederick, I knew it would be three weeks until I had another weekend completely devoid of any responsibilities as a sailor. I had already formulated a plan to ‘kidnap’ her when that free weekend came about.

During the ensuing days we kept up our regular rendezvous schedule. More and more I looked forward to seeing her and getting to know her even better. She was reluctant to tell me very much about her life, but bits and pieces did come out between slow dancing, drinking, smoking, and fucking. Her father had left her and her mother when she was still quite young. ‘He was an abusive type’, was about all the detail I got from her, but I could occasionally catch a glimpse of sorrow and pain in her eyes. I refrained from broaching the subject of her husband-the-biker. In fact, the fact that she was married at all, slipped away from my mind like so much quick silver…

One Saturday night she had me drive us to a Mall.

“Okay, what are we doing here?” I asked her. Malls ain’t my thing, you see.”

“I wanna buy you something,” she replied.

“Oh no you don’t. I have everything I need.”

“No. You need this, c’mon.”

She led me to a record shop and began searching the bins.

“What’re you looking for?” I asked.

“Gimme a sec. Oh here it is,” she announced happily pulling a cassette from the bin.

“What’s that?”

“You’ll love it. Trust me.”

“I’m already in-love….with you, you crazy bitch.”

She purchased Nighthawks at the Diner by Tom Waits, an artist I had never heard of….

Until Shonnie.

We drove to Balboa Park,  and opening some beers to go with our whiskey we listened to the cassette. I loved it from the very first minute. My Girl had me all figured out. It was just a little disconcerting, how she had so easily pegged me and yet to me she was still mostly an enigma.

After the sun set we started our make out session, then she did something unexpected. She unbuckled my jeans and started giving me head. This had never happened before and to say I was quite pleased would be an understatement bordering on the felonious. Just as I was really getting into it, she stopped suddenly, looked up at me with those piercing blue eyes and said solemnly, “If you come in my mouth, I will kill you.”

Well, that kind of ruined ‘My’ moment, but actually in a good way. It struck me so funny that I just could not help bursting out laughing. It was priceless. Make out session temporarily put on hold and my fondness for her intensified.

The next weekend (my ‘freedom’ one), we met at our usual rendezvous point. She, on instructions from me given over a pay phone, had brought along a bag with extra clothes and whatever other tricks of her trade she needed for a two-and-a-half day ‘excursion’, along with a pass from her mom relieving her of motherly duties for the weekend.

“So Cowboy, where are we going?”

“Vegas,” I said. “My turn to ‘educate’ you My Love.”

 

“Woolworth  Rhinestone diamond earrings and a sideways glance”

Greatest line from any song.

To be continued…  FIVE HERE

 

******

How I recall my Wonderful, Magical Months Spent with Shonnie: