Monkey World. We’re Livin’ In. Contact Yer Next ‘O Kin! (Or Your Best Mes-I-can) No Borders! No Fear Dear! Fuk You Fauci & CDC!

Salt Man On Monkeys:

Fuk U CDC!

I’m Livin’ My Life!

Take Your Quarantine

And

Shove it

Up Yer Azz!

****

WuFlu Without Borders!

HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

LMFAO!!

*****

P.S., If any one of my readers has lost a loved one to this virus, I am so sorry. This is just a frivolous, smart-ass’d tongue-in-cheek post. Constructed for Humor–That’s All. Mocking the hysteria

Love,

Lance

UPDATED / Expanded! Turned Into A Bit Of A Mini-Rant, But Y’all Know How I Tend To Roll… “Should I Continue This Series? Fishin’ for Encouragement Here. or Maybe I am Just Lonely… Who knows? No One, I suppose … “Rent – A – Sailor: Part One”

P.S. This Post Has Become A Long-Ass-Long-Winded–Verbosity-Laden–Monstrosity– –If You Manage To Slog Through It, Send Me A Bill. I Promise To Reimburse Your Purse For Lost Time.

Hahaha!

“The Line Forms To The Right”

Credit: Bobby Darin

Just Take A Number & Have A Seat.

I’ll Get To You. By And Bye

*****

Aussie Wu-Flu Photo Below:

Really Upsets Me, Because Last Time I Visited There,

The Mates & the Shelia’s Had NO Fear!

Not A Care

In This World

(Unless The Foster’s Ran Dry)

My Kind-Of-People:

Mostly Perpetually Happy & Up-Beat

Or…

In The Aussie Vernacular:

“No Worries Mate.”

Pretty Sure This “Aussie-Attitude”

Still Rings True–

At Least I Hopes It Do

Its Just

Their Fukk’Up Government.

But We Americans Cannot ‘Honestly’ Throw Stones

Can We?

*****

Aussie Gals Are FEARLESS

This Has Been My Experience

(Much Like Texan Gals)

Just For Ref:

***********

You Know You Are Dating an Australian Woman When…

Cred: Dating Beyond Borders

Aussie Sheilas:

****

I No Longer Wish to Return To Australia

I’m Stayin’ In Texas Where

The Government Ain’t Insane!

Nor

Gone Bat-Shit Crazy!

***

Aussie Covid-19:

Cred: WION

I Used To Love Australia

(Still Do Actually)

Crocodile Dundee:
“That’s not a knife: this is a Knife.”

Cred For Vid Share: Tomas Tree

*****
I love Australia
As I Want To remember Her
And All
The Shelia’s:

25 Great Crocodile Dundee Quotes:

Cred For Vid Compilation: PonAdidas

But Until They Get Over Their

Stupid WuFlu Panic,

I Ain’t Gonna Go Back

Australia Geography/Australia Country Song:

Cred: Kids Learning Tube

Land Down Yonder

Vid/Music Cred: Men at Work

*****

Olivia Neutron Bomb

“Magical”

Easy-Greasy. Got A Long Way to Slide:

*****

Screw It!

****

If My Wander-Lust Evah Return’eth,

I’m Goin’ To Ireland!

Irish Rovers-Drunken Sailor:

^^^^

Related:

“Rescue Mission”

–Kris:

Perhaps I’ll Run Into Erin Burnett While There.

Or Mayhaps

Even Ygritte.

As She(s) Is Passing Through Oh Her Way Back To Scotland

Yeah, Right.

I Could NEVER Get THAT Lucky!

Cred For Vid: Sara Cardoso

But Stranger Things Have Been Known To Happen… In My Life

Back in ’89 halfway into my last WestPAC (Western Pacific Deployment) bobbing about in the Pacific, onboard the USS Frederick LST 1184, we had already spent much time in Subic Bay, Hong Kong, Guam, Korea, Fuk-Ya-Mama Japan, and possible some other ‘Ornamental’ ports I do not recall.

USS Fred: LST 1184:

Well, we were steaming along in the South Pacific one day when word came down the pike that we had new orders to sail to Sydney.

What?

What?!

Hell Yes!

“But why?” I asked the first ‘Old-Salty-Squiddy’ I could find.

“Some idiots from a tin can (destroyer) dropped a pallet of high explosives on top of the Great Barrier Reef. We have to go retrieve it before shit jumps off. That reef is some kind of fuckin’ national park or something.”

“Why us?”

“Who the fuck knows? Who the fuck cares? We get to go to Australia! Australia! In Australia, they still LOVE us. There is this thing they do. It’s called ‘Rent-A-Sailor’ and you’ll see.”

“Hell you talking about? ‘Rent-A-Sailor’?”

“When we dock, there will be tons of women on the pier to greet us. They will all have paid real money to ‘host’ us while we are there. They love us. Maybe ‘cause we saved them from the Japs back in doubya doubya two.”

Hostesses for the Most of Us

“I see your point. Sounds great!”

“Just wait. You’ll see,” he said again breathlessly. I must admit, his excitement was contagious.

***

Now, do not get me wong (wrong). I love Southern Pacific Eastern ‘Ornamental’ Women and this is well-documented, but I, we, all of us, were in the mood for a female change of scenery. We wanted to see some ‘Round-Eyes.’ And before anyone accuses me of being ‘racist’ you may want to do some research on my blog—this one—and then get back to me.

All that shit spake…

We turned the Freddy Southbound-and-Down toward Sydney. Estimated steaming time to Australia: three days.

We were all very excited.

I Went looking for the ship’s barber to get me gussied up…

To be continued… Here. Y’all hear??

The Brilliance & Sagaciousness & Just Pure D Funniness That is Julie Nolke! I love her more than CASH Money!

I have not the words to quantify nor describe how much value this wonderfully talented, brilliant woman has added to my life.

And she is Canadian!

NOT Texican!

Go Figger!

I LOVE her in spite of that!

Hahahaha!

***

Must Must Must Watch if Nothing Else!

Fucking Brilliance in a Box

Pandora’s Box!

***

You will have to ‘rewind’ this one because YouBoob is fucking stupid.

Sorry.

I cannot fix it.

And the file is 355 fucking megabytes to download.

Fuck Fuck Fuck!

***

***

Julie Nolke began her career as a YouTuber in 2011. She joined the video-sharing site on October 3 while she was still a university student. She began posting comedy videos on the channel which slowly began attracting more and more views over time. She currently posts movie sketches and recipe tutorials and writes her script. Her videos have been viewed for more than 37 million times and her channel currently has more than 450 thousand subscribers. The number seems to be growing day by day as her videos are very funny and entertaining a lot of people all over the world.

Source:  Wiki Bio Worth

More Julie may be discovered here:

https://www.youtube.com/c/FeelingPeckish

More Shit That is Pissing Me Off Regarding: ‘Broken America’, Or… More ‘CNN Bashing’ & Still Laughing!

Watching Day Two of the Senate Hearings on Afghanistan.

The Gloves have come off today from the Republicans.

They are tearing these ‘Generals’ some new assholes.

They (and Sleepy Uncle Joe) really ‘screwed-the-pooch’ on this one

I am enjoying myself in the watching of them squirm while tryin’ to ‘spin’ the ‘un-spinable’

THESE ASSHOLES LEFT AMERICANS BEHIND!

They Should Be Drawn & Quartered. And Then Set on FIRE!

***

On a Slightly Lighter Note:

Monsieur Le Mark Dice Skewering CNN!

(And a few other of God’s Monumental Creation Fuck Ups)

P.S., I am still in a ‘heated battle’ with The WuFlu. Could go either way…

This may help to explain some of my ‘foul demeanor’–but I doubt it.

“The Future’s Uncertain and The End is Always Near”

–Jim Morrison

“Roadhouse Blues”

Vid Share Cred: JimJohnRayRobby

Have a Happy Day Y’all!

Just for Clarification:

I am an ‘Old-School’ Liberal

But…

These Lib-Assholes Today

WEAR ME THE FUCK OUT!

Woody: One of the Best Ever Amongst Us

If Herman Melville were trying to write ‘Moby Dick’ in 2021

“Chapter One: ‘Call me Bubba.'”

*scratches out*

“Chapter One: Call me ‘Fred’.”

*scratches out*

“Chapter One: Call Me ‘Gomer'”

*sends to social media*

“What y’all think?”

“Go kill yerself”

“Thanks. Now call me Ismael. Okay?”

“Post some fucking cute whale Tic Toks. Then we’ll talk. And next time, wear your fucking mask.”

“Okay, let me just put down this bowl and find my whale-oil lighter. BRB.”

Fucking Writers!

To Mask or Not to Mask (That is The Question)

Vid Cred: Shirley Șerban

Vid Cred: Shirley Șerban

Above Would Be Me!

If I were lost in Idiocracy

******

To live or not to Live

Zat is the Ques-ze-ion!
Personally, I do not mask.
(Nor do I Ask )

And I do not live in Fear!

Not My Style!

I have no Fear!

My Dear!

******

I Continue to live MY Life

(Such as it is)

Vid Cred: Shirley Șerban:

Brilliantly Done!
Bravo! Bravo! Bravo!

******


I do not mask my emotions.
I do not mask my current state (of poverty)
I do not mask my mind.

I do not mask my kind.

Why then, Oh Why?
Would I mask my face?

Not gonna Get the WuFlu

And even if I do… So What?

I do not have the WuFlu!

Fuck You if You do!

Stay Home!

Get Better!

Good Luck!

Cred: Buddy Brown

******

Take Your Masks Off!

Take your fucking masks off!

You are not fooling anyone!

With your False/Fake Make-Shift Bullshit!

Ride into Hell astride a great galloping White Pony!

Or sit upon a Fucking Rainbow Unicorn!

Your Option!

And try to hang on!