Category Archives: Music

I am only re-posting this because I am DRUNK! “Tennis Anyone?” –Didn’t Think So… Perhaps Dinner & A Movie Then?

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A Sumptuous Feast. Fit For Any Beast:

OK: Ready, Set, GO!

(Or is it, “Game. Set. Match?”)

I am easily befuddled…

Got my evening all mapped out:

Dinner and a movie—then perhaps a little ‘hanky-panky.’

Alcohol may come into play!

Char-dun-Yay!

All The Way!

&

Sade. Sade. Sade.

Pronounced

‘Shar-Day!’

How many times must I re-mind?

Sade insisted we invite Tom Over!

“Sure,” I said. “Wanna invite your Mother too?”

My Dreams of Wooing, Wedding, and Bedding

Sade

Became as a Schooner, Sinking Slowly in The West.

(See somewhat below)

“And It hurts like brand new shoes”
—Sade
(Beautiful, sad, sad song…)

(See Below for Some Kris Sailor Fun)

(Sade’s Momma)

Tennis Never Really Was My Game—Just Sayin’

*********

Tom arrived–already Four Sheets into the wind:

Game ON!

Let’s Get this Party Started!

It was at about this time that

MS Muse showed up,

carrying a can of Whoop– Ass.

We all kinda settled down a little at this point….

I un-corked the wine and put in the movie.

***************

Any and all laughs / jokes are on me,

But the Booze Ain’t Free

(Hit The Tip Jar on Your Way Out)

Merci!

(And Cheers!)

********

POST-SCRIPT FOR THIS UN-SCRIPTED POST:

In Case This Minor Detail Escaped Your Comprehension:

I LOVE SADE!!

POST-POST-POST – SCRIPT:

I’m NOT REALLY AN ASSHOLE:

(I just play one on WORD-DEPRESSED)

**********

POST-POST-POST-POST-POST – SCRIPT:

Watching Sade running down the filthy streets of (NYC?)

And past the ship docks…

Reminded me of yet another Strong, Determined, Beautiful

“I Will Not Be Denied”

Woman.

Whom I love, Respect, and Admire:

Barbra!

Best Line From The Song:

“At least I didn’t fake it.”

POST-POST-POST-POST-POST – POST-SCRIPT:

I love My Life.

And All My Ex-‘Wife’s

And All My Ex-Girl-Friends

And all the women I have had the honour to have known.

(Especially The Ones I got to Know in that ‘Biblical Sense’)

The very small and faint link below (Underneath Maddy) works… But WordPress IS STUPID! AND REFUSES TO EVEN ALLOW A THUMB-NAIL!

***************

As Promised Above:

Kris is Mentally Ill–This is why I love His Texican Dumb-Ass.

(Did that sound Gay?

Fuck it!

I don’t care!)

************

One last ‘Fun Fact’

And then I’m Done:

If it had not been for My Second,

Lisa-The-Shakespearean-Marlowe Prof,

(No! Lisa was my ‘Third.’—My Memory is somewhat flawed at times; and math has never been ‘my strong suit’

(I don’t even own a suit)

–Rhonda was ‘My Second’–But who’s counting, right?)

But 3rd time’s Le charme, n’est-ce-pas?

I would never have grown to truly, properly appreciate Sade, if not for ‘Mrs. Marcom The Third.’

Lisa had ALL of her CD/s

And for some many months…

She is all we listened to…

(Over and over, and over—again–she made us Happy)

Coast-to-Coast

***************

OH! Almost Forgot!

Lisa had one More Secret ‘Secret’ To Share

(I was Not Prepared—

for this One!)

She loved Madonna.

Had ALL Her CD’s as well.

Oh well!

Had no choice:

I fell in-love with Madonna too

********

“Happiness lies in your own hands.”

Ponder that.

How I live my life!

Only YOU are responsible for YOUR Own Happiness–

You are sole proprietor, caretaker, keeper of your own happiness.

No one, save you, can ‘make’ you ‘Happy.‘

It’s all on you.

Nobody else.

Women (I Know) I KNOW

******************

“Here’s to My Old Friend,” He said.

“And kissed his ass Goodbye.”

–Kris

Famous Texan

****

Ed. note 2021: My Third Wife, the Shakespeare one, once told me: Sade’s song is bullshit. “Hurts like brand-new shoes” as lyric does not work. Women in Somalia, never have brand-new shoes.”

I said back,

“Lisa, you really missed the point, didn’t you? I have been to Somalia. Have you?”

“Take That MaryPoppins UMbrella and Shove it UP ure Ass!” My Gawd! How Much How I MISS HER! UBH Post Continuation Teaser

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My GAWD!

I met a young broken woman while at Rehab.

(Hell! We were all ‘broken.’ Otherwise how the fuck did WE ALL END UP IN THIS PLACE??)

Let us call her name, “Kelsey” (Because that was probably her name)

Once while KNEE deep in some dark philosophical discussion she looked me dead in my eye and said,

“You can take that Marry Poppins umbrella and fly the fuck outta town.”

Instant Love and Instant Karma.

“Ethel, (The Cambodian) Pirate’s Daughter” seated next to me was not amused by my most recent love lust and infatuation.

But that is how things ‘work’ while in Rehab. Relationships are fleeting and ten-a-penny and not worth a cup of warm spit once one escapes…

Rehab.

Borrowed Karma

The payback and the interest is a mother-fucker.

(Please trust me on this; I know from where I speak)

Now, please, if you please, quietly fuck the fuck off.

“The line forms to the right.”

Internal Lance Voice chimes in:

“Who on Earth do you think you are? A Superstar?”

(“Well Wrong You Are!”)

YES! THIS IS A RANT! pLEASE! PLEASE! dO NOT READ, UNLESS YOU WANNA BE DIS-PLEASED! THEN, BY ALL MEANS, BE MY MOTHER-FUCKIN’ GUEST! BUT WATCH YER STEP! THIS SLOPE IS SKIPPERY & SLIPPY-ERY!!! motherFUCK YOU WordPress! I am Cryin’ Over Madelyn. wanted to think about her some more! add some shit to a recent post! But Oh No! Caint bE havin’ that FUCK YOU WP! THERE IS AWWAZE A FUK-U WORK-AROUND! WHO THE FUK YOU THINK U BE FUKKIN’ WID?! HUH???!!! IDIOTs! MORONS! “How Do You Hold A Moonbeam In Your Hand?” FUK YOU WP! IF YOU DID NOT HOLD ALL MY SHIT HOSTAGE I WOULD FUCKING JUST FUJJING KILL YOU AND THEN SPIT ON YER GRAVE!!!!!!!!!!!! AND LMFAO!!!!!!!!!! AS I MADE MY WAY TO AN IRISH PUB TO NOT DRINK A TOAST TO YU! FUCK YOU! YOU ASH=HOLES! HOPE YOU TURN TO ASH ‘FORE I DO! I WON’T GIVE A SINGLE SHIT! ‘THRUST’ ME! (BUT YOU’RE TOO FUKKIN’ STUPID TO REALIZE TH’ JOKE IS ON YOU!!!!!!!! YU MORONS! GO AHEAD! TRY ME! I ALMOST GRA-D-E-ATED FROM ‘TRAINED, LICENZE TO KILL MORON SCREW=YOU SCHOOL! FUKKIN’ TIMES TWO. I HAVE SEEN IT ALL! DO NOT PISS ME OFF ONCE MORE! TRUST ME! I’M FUKKING NUTS! HEY! HEY! NSA! BRING IT! I AM ‘BOUT TO B’COME A DOMESTCATED TERROR MOTHER-FUCKER!–IST! JUST-IST! YEAH! FUCKIN’ JUSTICE! GO AHEAD! PUSH THE RED BUTTON! SEE WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENS! YOU MAY NOT LIKE IT, BUT WHO KNOWS? YOUR MILEAGE AND BLOOD SPILLAGE… MAY TARRY OR VARY! ASK ME HOW MANY FUCKS I’M GONNA GIVE! I GOTS ME NOTHIN’ LEFT TO LOSE. THIS MAKES ME A VERY DANGEROUS SUMBITCH! DO NOT FUK WID ME! WORD TO ANYONE WHO MAY STILL BE WISE IN YER FUKKIN’ LAME=ASS ORI-FIZE! WHICH I AM QUITE CERTAIN IS OVER-SIZED (AND BLOATED BEYOND REPAIR!)

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I still miss her.

“Maria” (And some guy)

Madelyn & Me!

Me & Madelyn!

On-The-Stage!

Stars!

She & Me!

Me & She!

We had to share The Spotlight, but

“The Play”

Was always about

HER

Not Me

As it should be.

*******

She ‘Maria’ to My ‘Cap’n Von Trapp’

“Sound of Music” HS Play: Circa 1975

(Every so often, Script demanded we ‘kiss’—We never did during rehearsals.)

During one rehearsal, when the script DEMANDED a kiss, and RIGHT NOW!

We didn’t. We did not kiss.

Some fellow ‘actor’ shouted, “Hey! Y’all didn’t do the kiss! How are Y’all gonna do a believable kiss on stage if you don’t rehearse?

Madelyn didn’t miss a beat and coolly replied,

“We rehearse our kisses every night.

When we are at home.

Alone.

So don’t worry.”

Opening night, we kissed, not unlike two horny teens. It was painful. (For her. Not for me! I had been waiting for years to kiss her!)

And right before we kissed, live on stage, in front of about three hundred audience, she whispered to me,

“You better not slip me no tongue.”

So… guess what I did?

Yep.

“C’est Française, n’est-ce-pas?“

She was NOT Amused, but she pulled it off, non·plussed

As if nothing untoward had just happened.

*********

OK. I am sober now. Slept off my drunk.

Easy.

I have Slept Off thousands of drunks in my day.

Got that routine down pat.

Could not sleep off my sorrow over losing my

MY

My Dear Madelyn:

New unchartered waters for me.

Never have I lost a sister.

My heart is broke, but this is not gonna be about me.

Lord knows I write too much about me and my narcissism.

This is about My Sister, My Madelyn.

My intent is to write and write and write about her for the next few days until I run out of virtual ink in my virtual pen.

Some of you out there in ‘Radio Land’ knew her.

If you have any memories to share, now would be the time.

This may come across as ‘sick’ to you, read in the harsh light of present day:

But, if I am being honest with my feelings, I must write them.

Since Madelyn and I were not actually ‘blood relations’ there were more than a few times when we were tempted.

Tempted to be much more than step-brother and step-sister.

There for damn sure was a mutual physical and cerebral attraction.

But… we were ‘mature’ enough, even back then, mature enough to understand that we could not go there, however much we, at times, desperately wanted to.

We wanted to ‘go there.’

Oh My God!

How we wanted to ‘Go There’!

But We didn’t.

It would have been so easy.

We had the entire third floor of Marcom Manor to ourselves.

The parents were often gone for days at a time.

Leaving us to ‘fend’ for ourselves.

For the sake of ‘The Family’… we didn’t.

Go there.

We didn’t go there.

Some small part of me wishes we had.

But if we had, this would be quite a different post than the one I am writing right now.

Over all the years there were so many things I wanted to say to Madelyn, but shit always seemed to get in the way.

Now, my mind is racing with all those words left unsaid.

Never to be said, at least not in this place, this alone place I find me in.

I suppose I can just cast this one out into the ether:

“Madelyn, I love/loved you!”

But she cannot hear me now, can she?

“How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?”

********

This Song very well, and very accurately, describes Madelyn.

She was always a ‘Problem.’

But!

She was SO Fucking charming!

Could NEVER be angry at her.

Never!

Not for a moment!

She could melt / play you with a smile.

(And she knew this power she had)

And trust me Folks,

She wielded it.

With reckless abandon.

(Much to my chagrin at times)

I could never get away with shit.

Madelyn did.

Every day!

Every-Fucking-Time!

**********

I cannot continue this.

At this moment.

But I will come back.

And sooner than later

Twisted Duet (Just One More Madelyn Memory…)
He’s not Really Heavy: He is my Brother; I Can Manage.

***********

Gretchen:

“Madelyn had a horse once: a cross between a Shetland pony and a Welsh mare. Now, I really don’t know much about horses and during that time I knew even less, but I really did want to play cowboy, so I decided to make friends with the local “real cowboy” and have him teach me how to ride this animal. I was about twelve going on thirteen at the time.

The problem with this horse was that it was a pet. Madelyn had talked my father into buying it for her not long after she and her mom moved in (I was not yet on the scene; was still living with my grandparents.

I suppose I arrived some months after the horse). Anyway, she soon lost interest in Gretchen (is that a proper horse name?) hence, she (Gretchen) never ever got ridden; (I cannot speak for Madelyn.) This will become important later in my story.”

***

Leroy:

First he was taken by Kim. Kim got bored with him and gave him to my step-sister Madelyn. She thought he was just the coolest thing ever!

For about three days…

His coolness factor having for her it seems, a very short half-life, I made her an offer she couldn’t refuse for her coon: Cash Money. Money’s coolness factor has no half-life. She was only too happy to surrender Leroy to my care for the tidy sum of thirty-five bucks. Quite tidy indeed to an unemployed High School girl in 1974.

********

My heart is broken.

I miss you Madelyn!

You were so much more than my sister.

I was so forever in love

With

You

With You

OK. Now I am Drunk again.

Seems I have come ‘Full-Circle.’

I am gonna stop fucking around with this post and just wallow in my grief.

I miss My Sis

I’m Still Searchin’ For My Rainbow “Happy Place!” Oh Wait! Found IT! Madonna! Brings Me Happiness! Endless Happy! I LOVE HER! She Has Enriched My Life! Immensely! Immeasurably! Fore-ev’r-ably! (I spent a few little minutes building this one) I do hope you enjoy my “Work”!)

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MTB!

Not an old post, but, on my mind of late.

(I put a lot of ‘work’ and ‘effort’ into this one…. some beers ago…)

WOKE Folk?

Go fuck yourselves.

To be quite honest, I had never been a big fan,

Until… My Third, Lisa-the-Professor, sat me down in front of the TV one night and put on “Truth or Dare.”

(The Blond Ambition Tour)

By the end of the film, I was IN-Love.

And In-Awe.

And In-Respect.

“The Girl, she works hard for the money.”

(Sorry Donna)

Madonna Keeping It Real:

From that night forward, I could never get enough Madonna in my life.

Still true today.

***

When I was working at Latson’s Printing & Office Supply I kept a framed photo of Madonna on my desk.

One day a customer asked me, while pointing at the photo,

“Is that your daughter?”

“Naw” I said, “That’s my Mom.”

***

I discovered a little black pin left on the cork board June (My landlady and sometime lover) had on the wall of the kitchen.

Guess it had lost its magic for her. NOT for Me though.

Such a Treasure!

It read, “More Madonna, Less Jesus.”

Naturally, I had to pin it on my shirt and wear it to work, much to the distress of Dick Latson, Owner and Boss-Man.

Baptists and Church-of-Christers made up a large portion of our clientele. Oh, and Methodists too.

To his credit, Dick did not tell / order me to remove the pin.

But since I could see that my wearing it caused him not a little anguish, I only wore it that one day. Just wanted to see how many people’s buttons I could push.

Actually I (disappointedly) only got one comment the entire day:

A slightly fortyish attractive lady remarked as I was ringing up her purchases,

“I think your pin should say ‘More Jesus, Less Madonna’”

I replied, “I originally ordered that one, but was told those were on back-order, so I had to settle for this one instead”

(Yeah, I was somewhat of a smartass back then)

But she laughed. At least she had a sense of humor.

Of course, I always kept my Madonna Photo prominently displayed upon my desk.

***

Now I am cognizant of the fact that there are myriad ‘Madonna Haters’ out there in ‘Radio Land.’

Here is My Philosophy, (Well-Documented in some of my posts) and some advice:

You don’t have to love the ‘artist-person’ to love the art. There are lots of performers I detest because of their off-stage persona or antics, or just piss-poor personality in general.

But… That does not stop me from enjoying and appreciating their art.

I do not give two shits about their politics, arrogance, religion, sexual preferences, et cetera. If their art entertains and enriches my life, I am good with them.

On the other hand, they can be as wonderful and charming as all get out, but if they have no true performance talent, I move on.

Here is the advice part for anyone out there who may need it:

Do not be so narrow and small-minded, and full of your own morality that you prevent yourself from enjoying good art.

That loss is yours.

And yours alone.

Believe me, the artists, the great ones especially, don’t give a shit if you boycott them or not.

****

Try to remember:

“Life is a Cabaret”

Enjoy it while it lasts. Don’t deny yourself value and enjoyment in your life just because some great performer pisses you off due to their persona while off-stage.

You most assuredly have conquered My World Baby!

***

***

Of Course when “Evita” Premiered in Dallas Lisa and I were First in-Line at the Box-Office.

Good Thing Too, as The Movie Sold Out Quickly

***

Beaucoup More Madonna Below.

Feel Free to Cherry-Pick.

Or Watch Them All!

Another Entry In My “Cock-Eyeyed Optimisty-You Know….”Now Pay Attention Kids. Things Are Gonna Get Easier; Things Are Gonna Get Brighter”

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So, Buck Up Lil Campers!

*****

Most of Below Originally Posted on FaceBook.

(Sorta)

****

“Now pay attention Kids.

I am Not sayin’ I love this version more than the other I recently Posted.

But Damn it’s Great! More Healthy Optimism,

Less Dread!


And Y’all know Beautiful Redheads make me weak-in-the-knees

No, not the dude with the red Ragnar Lodbrok Beard & wearin’ the Pork Pie Hat. LOL!

The Women! FFS!”

Artists Cred: An international Musical Collective.

Vid share credit: bikfoot

“Life and art & music finds a way.” (Yeah, I added that part) Screw You WuFlu!

Sue me

**********

OK, so I was trying to sleep yet another one off.
Was having this dream:
Someone was placing their hands on me.
I woke up.


MS Muse had placed some headphones over my ears and whispered softly to me,


“Hear Baby; Listen to this:
Things are gonna grow better, brighter.
I promise.”

(Since WhorrPress is SO STUPID. try to find one of My Abusive Muse Links Below. Approach it as an Easter Egg Hunt.)

Un-Requited Love! (Abusive, Callous Muse)

Artists Credit: Five Stairsteps
Vid Share Credit: danschutz

***

I guess she really does love me after all…

I love her more.

Just sayin’

***

Have A Great Good Friday Y’all!

***

Bonus ‘Added Value’ Tracks
Just To ‘ACCENTUATE THE POSITIVE’ :

The GREAT Bob Marley

The GREAT Johnny Mercer

Accentuate the Positive!

Bing Baby!

And My Be’Loved Andrews Sisters!

Happy Cockeyed Optimist. I’m Stuck Like a Dope With a Thing called ‘Hope’–C’est Moi!

Come On YA’LL! READ THIS ONE! I spent at Least Five Minute(s) Writing IT! yA! I mis-Spiel for The Effect! Hahahahahaa! “I am Re-Re Posting This Expanded Version Because I am Wallowing in Self-Pity For not ‘Making’ A Daughter. Don’t Bother Reading. It is Just For The Record of My Self-Pity. “Every (Rare) Once In A While I See Something On TV That ‘Moves’ Me. This Commercial Moved Me–Gave Me Hope–Made Me Misty-Eyed. Almost Cried.” That’s a Lie. I did cry.”

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I have been re-watching “Mad Men”–Most are familiar with the show.

For those who have been living under a rock for the past two decades:

The series is all about Madison Avenue.

Advertising in The Sixties.

Anyway,

This ‘commercial’

is

Brilliant!

It actually brought a tear to my eye

(See below about how sorry I feel for myself for not taking the time to have a daughter)

Credit: Vanguard

***

One More “Daughter-Related” Brilliantly done Commercial

“Roots and Wings”

Vid Cred: Entertainment Marketing

Longer Version (Audio Only—Full Vid has been flushed down the memory hole. Shit!)

Artist:  Miranda Lambert

***

Rosanne

Vid Cred: I don’t Know, (I am too drunk to be bothered to look but thak you!

Whoever the fuck you are!)

***

More of Rosanne!

“You know that life don’t hold no glamour anymore”

Let’s break this down, shall we?

It all hinges on the word ‘that’

And how you intrepret the usage of it

“You know ‘that life’ don’t hold no glamor anymore.”

Could mean potential sucicide

or…

You know ‘that’ life, could mean “I am fucking tired of being a performing artist and I want a ‘real life’

What do Y’all think?

Which is it?

Could be both

This is the genius of the song

I think the “answer” lies in the last Line:

“Maybe I’ll just go away to stay”

Now that that mystery is solved I can move on

Hey Johnny!

Best “Thing” You Ever “Created!”

I am so Fuckin’ Jealous!

You Asshole!

You Lucky Asshole!

“Guess I Could Never Do Nothin’ Right!”

Orig Song Cred: Jerry Jeff Walker

***

An aside:

Damnit! I wish I had a daughter!

(Fuckin’ ‘DUH!)

What is WRONG With Me? I Cannot Get This Out of my Head. It is well-documented in These Pages How Much I Wish I’d had a Daughter, but… I Cannot Even Begin to Imagine… What I Would Do If I had one and then some asshole…

***

The Commercial Copywriters were obviously inspired by this classic Ben E. King:

Spanish Harlem

And Yes It is Not Lost On Me That

“Rose” is Metaphor for a Woman

Just like “The Yellow Rose of Texas”

I have a little left of my brain

Y’all

Cred for Vid: John1948OneD

***

I should have worked in advertising.

Pretty sure I would have been good / great at it.

I understand how it ‘works’

***

P. T. Barnum:

“There’s a Sucker Born Every Minute”:

Content Creator Cred: Professor Buzzkill

***

Lance in an alternate life/universe:

***

Bonus Material For Reference:

Yellow Rose of Texas

(Originally Written Circa 1850)

(Which was actually about a very beautiful half-black slave girl–put that in yer pipe)

Smoke it!

Vid Cred: Lane Brody

Artists: Johnny Lee & Lane Brody