(And Normally I would NOT Want To.)
But This Is TEXAS INDEPENDENCE DAY!
So I had to attempt a work-around.
Recently in TEXAS:
WHAT A MISERY!
Richardson,
Texas
Commerce, Texas–short time ago (Where I am Hangin’ MY Hat)
Home of TAMU-Commerce
**************
I am curious to Discover if ‘THIS’ Works.
I give it FIFTY-FIFTY.
*************
Below is The Expanded,
Better Version.
‘J’espère.’
(I hope)
Merely Distractions.
How did I get so drunk so fast?
I only had sixteen glasses of wine in twelve minutes!
‘Scuze for a moment.
Bill Gates is on CNN.
I have to remove a shoe, so that I might puke into it.
BRB!
OK.
I tried and tried and I tried!
To get through this CNN interview with
Bill Gates.
Could not take any more!
Picked up my TV and threw it out the window.
(It, the window, was not open)
It is open now…
I hear sirens in the distance.
Growing louder, and louder!
Ooops!
“And you can’t find your waitress with a Geiger Counter.”
Been there.
Too many times…
The computer has been Drinking.
Not me!
Vid Credit: MasterBiblicalMemory
Genius!
**********
I only Drop This In Because I like It!
This Would Not Be A Proper TT&H Post W/O Some Joni!
(And I Love Joni!)
Y’all Know That!
.
–Rose Castorini (Olympia Dukakis)
In This Vid Clip, You Will Discover Lance.
Video Cred: Ted Reinert
Lance loves women;
He just cannot help Himself.
He does not understand them.
Therein lies that magic…
“Moonlight in a Martini.”
(Volumn is fukked. Crank it up!)
Lance Romance.
Added Value:
“Breaks Your Heart Just Lookin’ At Her.”
Snakes and Ladders
–Joni
(If you do not listen carefully to the song… I dropped it in For A Really, Really, Really Good Reason)
(Figure it out–If You Can)
I am flying SOLO NOW!
WISH ME LUCK!
“He Gave up Happy Hour For Her.”
Joni/Muse!
I don’t like spiders and snakes.
But I do love Karen,
Karen Carpenter.
Video Credit: “Carpenters” Carpenters
Duh!
Karen?
Why? Oh why?
Why did you leave us?
Karen!
Karen Carpenter!
You killed you!
And robbed us of You.
Why???
Why Oh Why?
I suppose you were broken
As am I
But I am still Alive!
Why?
Why did you cop out?
I miss you!
Marvelous Much!
And I shall always love you.
You!
You!
You!
Karen Carpenter!
I am in perpetual love with you.
With your broken wing and your broken mind.
Facebook Post:
Good morning!
I am feeling somewhat “normal” today.
Trying to stay two steps ahead of the neck pain.
Taking lots of Ibuprofen and booze.
Put MS Muse Out of my Misery.
But I miss her already.
I just may have a life after all.
Or not.
“O, that way madness lies; let me shun that;
No more of that.”
—King Lear, Act 3, Scene 4
Too heavy?
Fuck with me?
You’ll get what you fucking deserve.
Love,
Lance…
The NSA Are on Their Way!
“Hey! Hey! NSA! On The Way!
(Ditto the Local Cops!)
“Surround the House!”
“Madman Inside!”
“Be careful Boys!”
“Let’s Take Him Down…”
“But Quietly.”
“No Muss. No Fuss.”
*****
Do not Fuck with Me!
I will not Hesitate to Empty a Clip Into Your Dome.
MS Muse– Miss Misery:
Feel Free To Conduct A Search
For ‘Abusive Muse.’
There you may find happiness.
******
BONUS MATERIAL BELOW
Crit-After-My-Own-Heart-Drinker-Man!
If you do not watch this, or appreciate this…
Your Loss
Farewell To My Best Friend:
The Abusive Muse
This pains me to write.
“Kate, We were only Yesterday.
Now we are…”
Today, and Yesterday, and Tomorrow.
“I love you, and I Thank You.”
Karen
Karen Carpenter!
You killed you!
And robbed us of You.
Why???
Why Oh Why?
Some of you good and loyal readers have been with me all the way on this Odyssey.
Others of you… not so much.
But if Y’all read-between-the-lines, you will discover how my sanity is a very fragile entity.
I ‘Created’ Katherine/MS Muse out of a ‘need’ I had.
To Fill A Hollow Vacant Void in my Heart.
I was lonely.
I needed her.
To kick my ass and make me a better writer.
I created her. Then I, Pygmalion-Like, fell in Love with Her. (Yeah, I kinda carried it too far)
She was always there. (‘Cept for the Snowpocalypse, when she invited me to fuck off)
I loved her.
I still love her.
*************
Last real conversation I had with her:
“Lance, Baby, you understand I am not a real girl. You created me. I live in your mind and at your leisure.”
“Yes. I am a figment of your mind. Does not mean I don’t love you. I will always be here for you. And if you choose, I will love you. I will ‘write’ you, as far as you may write yourself. But ‘marry’?
I cannot.
You must write for YOU, and only for YOU.”
**************
After sitting in front of my computer and trying to write, I looked over at her, sitting on The Nasty Couch with her NY Times, Pinot, Virginia Slims…
Walked over to her.
Offered my hand
She looked me in my eyes, took my hand.
Then she melted.
Turned into a pile of sand.
I screamed!
“What just happened!?”
A soft, familiar voice came at me from the ceiling:
“Lance, My Love, we are done. You are done. You are ready. I must leave you now.”
“NOOOOO!”
“Yes,” she said and that was it.
I fell to my knees and wept like a little pup/bitch.
Then I spied a note on the floor:
Picked it up.
It read:
“Lance, you were the best. I loved you. Write on!”
–Kate
P.S., “JUST WRITE ASSHOLE!“
Or Else!
–K
*****
I took that to the bank.
