Exclusively Here on TT & Hiero-Glyph!
That means you won’t hear it anywhere else! (Because we made it up)
The Results are finally in from yesterday’s,
recent, last week’s election!
Okay was not last week; just seems that way.
Here are the tallies:
Jim Morrison: 20, 000
He is an Accident Going Somewhere to Happen: 20, 001
Walk of Shame: 20,010
The Kind and Good and the Ugly Moral Folks: 20,005
Puddles in My Beer: 0
Now, after some contentiousness, and some hanging chaffs, and some fourteen pissed off, and some sixteen or so pissed on, and some countless bored, and some dead armadillos, and some more hanging chaff, it was decided that the vote went unanimously to:
PUDDLES IN MY BEER!!
(And the crowd went nuts)
“But, but, but, how is that unanimous?” One pollster inquired.
“Because Son,” The State said, “Because theirs was the only un-contested, not so much molested, unambiguous result.”
Now before we exposé the PUDDLES IN MY BEER platform (gangplank), we must survive the Inauguration Ball.
And here to help us along with that, May I present to Y’all, our most ardent (and redundant) supporters!
Willie And The William’s Boys!
Take it away Boys!
Thanks to Willie an’ Them For that Rather Upbeat Rendition of …what was it again? *taps Willie on the shoulder* “Uh Willie, ya fucked the lyric: it is “Puddles In My Beer”; not ‘bubbles’, get it right fer fuck sake… Goin’ to Austin…I mean DC. Aw shit. Never mind! Just get the damn song right, OK?”
And Thank You Both Hanks for that rather unifying ditty in honor of the forgotten, vanquished.
But now, to prove we are not all that…uh… sanctimonious.
We give some equal / air time to the
losers, er, Honorable Opposition:
Take it away Jimmy!
But don’t take it too far or too long. We are watching you. Loser!
“Uh… Thank you…uh what was your name again? Oh yeah, Jimmy.
Well, Hey! Let’s give a big round of applause for…uh Jimmy and his comedy!”
“Thank you Johnny!”
Tomorrow (Or Next Beer) we will tell you the plan forward.
Hang tight in the meantime.
We love our Country!