mORE tEx-I-CAN bULL-sHITe! “The Raven”

The Greatest Texan Of Them All! 

Sam Houston!!

Who was a Tennessean (Virginian by birth) through no fault of his own

“The secession leaders tell us if war comes that the superior courage of our people with their experience of the use of firearms will enable us to triumph in battle over ten times our number of Northern forces. Never was a more false or absurd statement ever made by designing demagogues. I declare that Civil War is inevitable and near at hand”

Raven

The Raven

When it comes the descendants of the heroes of Lexington and Bunker Hill will be found equal in patriotism, courage, and heroic endurance with the descendents of Cowpens and Yorktown … When the tug of war comes, it will be Greek meeting Greek. Then, oh my fellow countrymen, the fearful conflict will fill our fair land with untold suffering, misfortune, and disaster.”
— Sam Houston with some prescient words on the eve of the Civil War in February, 1861

https://www.facebook.com/TracesofTexas?fref=nf

California on my Mind (mIND? MiNd? No I Don’t Mind! I No Longer Have The TIME! NOr The DiMe) I No Longer Have ONe! But Texas Always in my Heart???? Huh??? And OnCE a=GIN” fUK u word-de-Pressed! i CANnOT eDIit This!!!! Why Not???? Why The Fuk NOT???? Fuk U Word-Disstressed!

CaliI have spilled’d way too

Much Ink on California Yeah! I spent

Fuk California

Yeah! I spent one Night in The Hotel Del…

Back When, Way BaCk When!

When I was in SEAL Train’in’

So What????

The Hotel Del Did NOT

Impress Me!

Mother-fuck California!

Jes Kidd’n

I LoVe Her!

Almost hALF as Much as I Love TEXAS!

Aerosmith – Crazy 

GTT

More Texas

Less California

Loved it. Hated it. Few decades ago I could truthfully say, “Hey! I’ve spent half my life in California.” (See This Or This)

Now I can say, “Hey! I’ve spent most of my life in Dangerous Desolate Places.” (Middle East &  East Texas) That worm did turn some. (Go Here or There)

As a Native Texan, I am supposed to always hate California and yes, Yes to all you Texans out there: I know this. I get it. Put the rope down.

Yet I more love than hate California.

In California I learned to appreciate music, art, science, literature, hippies, beaches and blondes. My first kiss was not in California, but I didn’t miss that milestone by much–In California.

In Texas I learned to appreciate drankin’ whiskey and beer , smokin’ dope, playin’ football, chasin’ cheerleaders, and Raisin’ Hell.

Arriving home to Texas late 1968 folks made fun of my ‘California Accent’ if there even is such a thing. (There were no Valley Girls in the Sixties as far as I know). My ‘accent’ was ‘just the way normal people talked’ as far as I was concerned. Texans sounded funny to me (Blasphemy!)

My Attitude Adjustment didn’t take long to take.

In California I was a Little League Baseball Star. In Texas no one gave two shits about baseball. I had to learn football. Not that that was necessarily a bad thing, but I had all those baseball skills which were not worth a cup of spit in Texas.

I love Texas and don’t get me wrong. But once in a while, when I see a photo or a news bit showing San Francisco, or San Diego, or a beach, or a blonde… I hear this guy singing:

Sometimes I even hear this blonde singing:

And I tear up. (Just a little bit) but then I throw on some Bob Wills and Remember Who I am.

Bob Wills

And thus remembering, I go out and buy a case of Lone Star Long Necks and listen to this guy:

And I Thank The Spirit of Sam Houston I Am A Texan.

WIP: Work In Continual Die-Gress! I Guess. Hahahaha! “I LOVE MY TEXAS (And Once Agin, Gin and WP Fucked My Edit–I Forgave The Gin, Not The W’d-Press) But I always find a way to out-nerd the nerds. Lance (and life) Always Finds A Way”

*****

Molly!

(Lubbock Gal Born & Bred–Never Wed)

******

Mac (Not The Knife)

Also Lubbock!

“Too Much Gin and Not Enuff Vermouth”

Been There

*******

Willie Nelson – Beautiful Texas

Cred for Vid: ItsWaldo (Walter Brinkman)

****

And Jackie From Austin

How Much Do I love her?!

‘Hep’ Me Count The Ways

Break out Your Texas Instruments Calculator!

Yer Gonna Need It

Lost In Time

Lose Your Mind

Already There, Wonderful, Beautiful Texan

LADY

Got The T-Shirt & Ever’ Thang!

*****

Mysterious

From Jackie Venson

Live in Texas

****

I miss Peanut so much

1

*******************

And of Course,

Glen

(Although He was ‘From’ Arkansas)

Texas Forgave Him that Miss’d-Judgment On His Part

Cred for Vid: melvinrobb

******

Armadillo By Mornin

Cred: George Strait

*****

Just thought I needed to make

That perfectly clear. Reiterate for the stupid who don’t read the title of MY Blog

Mucho mas to come on this subject

******

Little Texas – God Blessed Texas:

Lyle & His Large Band:

“That’s Right; You’re NOT From TEXAS”

Tanya! You Texan Slut!

I LOVE

You!

SO

MUCH!!

Fuck it! I’ll Drop This In

Just for Grins

No One gonna read it anyway

(Updated Old Post–Added Some Bull-Shite) All Texan Lives Matter. I Have, Of Late, Lost All My Mirth and Have Become A Lonely, Sent… uh… Mental Old Fool. Some One Please Come And Put Me Down! “California on my Mind But Texas Always In My Heart” (And Word-Dee-Pressed is Still FUCKED UP! I Cannot Properly EDIT This Post!)

GTT

More Texas

Less California

Loved it. Hated it. Few decades ago I could truthfully say, “Hey! I’ve spent half my life in California.” (See This Or This)

Now I can say, “Hey! I’ve spent most of my life in Dangerous Desolate Places.” (Middle East &  East Texas) That worm did turn some. (Go Here or There)

As a Native Texan, I am supposed to always hate California and yes, Yes to all you Texans out there: I know this. I get it. Put the rope down.

Yet I more love than hate California.

In California I learned to appreciate music, art, science, literature, hippies, beaches and blondes. My first kiss was not in California, but I didn’t miss that milestone by much–In California.

In Texas I learned to appreciate drankin’ whiskey and beer , smokin’ dope, playin’ football, chasin’ cheerleaders, and Raisin’ Hell.

Arriving home to Texas late 1968 folks made fun of my ‘California Accent’ if there even is such a thing. (There were no Valley Girls in the Sixties as far as I know). My ‘accent’ was ‘just the way normal people talked’ as far as I was concerned. Texans sounded funny to me (Blasphemy!)

My Attitude Adjustment didn’t take long to take.

In California I was a Little League Baseball Star. In Texas no one gave two shits about baseball. I had to learn football. Not that that was necessarily a bad thing, but I had all those baseball skills which were not worth a cup of spit in Texas.

I love Texas and don’t get me wrong. But once in a while, when I see a photo or a news bit showing San Francisco, or San Diego, or a beach, or a blonde… I hear this guy singing (See below)

(Funny Madelyn Aside: She caught me playin’ … and listenin’ to this on our beat up old record player. Both speakers wrapped over my head, She pulled them off and shouted,

“Fuck are you doin’ Lance?”

“I miss San Francisco.”

“Go  fuck yourself! We are Texans! And after you finish fucking yourself, go downstairs and set the table for supper,”

Sometimes I even hear this blonde singing:

And I tear up. (Just a little bit) but then I throw on some Bob Wills and Remember Who I am.

Bob Wills

And thus remembering, I go out and buy a case of Lone Star Long Necks and listen to this guy:

And I Thank The Spirit of Sam Houston I Am A Texan.

Mother Fuckin’ Fuck You WordPress!

Why Do You Insist On Making My Life More Difficult!

I Have Enuff Already Difficulties on My Own!

I do NOT Need Your Contribution!

AS MY ERSTWHILE Moroccan Lover once

(twice-thrice–many times)

Told me:

“Go to Fuck You!”

Texas Inferiority (Betcha Never Heard That One) From Me. If you have no cents of humor… You do not belong here. her. here. her. fuck it. I think you caught my drift

TEXAS GODDAMN IT!

Texas has (a little bit of) an inferiority complex

Here is why:

220px-Sam_Houston_by_Mathew_Brady

The Father of Texas

Texas really was never a part of the ‘Old Plantation’ South. We were, for the most part, dirt farmers, miscreants, outlaws, and such. Most of us did not own slaves. We just worked. We were poor. When secession issues came to town, we were too busy fightin’ Comanche’s to give a shit.

“Take yer sea-session somewhar else. We doan cotton to tha’.

But after the election of Lincoln we came around and our Johnny Rebs made us proud. Fought like Comanches, we did.

The very first acronym was GTT: Gone To Texas. (You can look it up) Translated into “This asshole has left his family, his debt, and his crimes. He has GTT. Good riddance.”

Sam Houston was governor of Tennessee. He went GTT. And thank God he did. Sam (The Raven) was adamant in his opposition to secession. He had a Cherokee wife…

I love Texas.

We are far from Perfect. (Well not that far)

And we know it.

That matters: the knowing of it.

But do not fuck with us.

You will regret that.

The Raven

My Favorite Texan (For Today Anyway)

Goddamn! I love Texas women!

TEXAS WOMEN

Tanya!

What can I say?

Tanya (famous for ‘Tanya Moments’–dancin’ on tables an’ stuff–Gotta love Tanya!)

She ain’t no Kris Kristofferson, no poet,  but Damn! She embodies all that is Texas: Vain, rough, loud and proud!

Texas! A whole nuther country!